Women By Design

A Real, Risen, Reigning, Returning King

2010-09-02T06:08:00.000-04:00

If he's real but not reigning, he can't help me. If he's risen but not real, he's just a good story. If he's not risen, he can't return. But if he returns, then he proves that he is Real, he is Risen, and he Reigns. By faith we trust that he is real, risen, and reigning, and we look for his final return as the end of the age.

I used to work with an amazingly sweet lady who believed that Jesus saved her from herself and from messes, but that any further salvation was unnecessary. She did not live in the fear of the Lord, but brought great shame to the name she claimed to bear. Jesus is not a fake-savior or wishful thinking or an inspiring story. He is not merely a threat to make bad people live in fear or a sweet story to make good people not fear. He is the Creator of the universe. He is the author of our salvation.

Hebrews 2 says, "we do not yet see everything in subjection to him." But we DO see that the other things spoken about him all came to pass, guaranteeing the completion of his work. He has not lied to us--every past deed is proof of his future deeds. When the time was right, he came as a man. When the next time is right, he will come again to judge the living and the dead. His word is good and cannot fail, and so we trust in our blessed hope.

How often we live like he is not real, or not risen, or not reigning, or not returning. We talk a lot about him, about his resurrection and reign. But how many of our conversations dwell on his return? How does his glorious, triumphant return define and change our lives?

Drawing Near with Boldness

2010-08-26T12:16:00.000-04:00

Pastor Tim's message on Sunday held up the early Christians before us as an example of true, fervent worshipers. Jerome, a believer in the 4th century, looked back at those early believers and said, "The blood of Christ was yet warm in their veins."

The need for passionate reverence (or reverent passion) is an interesting one. Most of the time when we see passionate people, they aren't reverent (picture football fans). And many times reverence comes without passion--I distinctly remember being 4 or 5 years old at my great-aunt Peg's funeral. I was terrified into reverence by the open casket, but I had never even met my great-aunt and felt no emotion toward her at all.

The seraphim in the throneroom of heaven have need to cover their faces, even as they cry, "Holy, holy, holy!" That is how great God is. As C.S. Lewis put it and Pastor Tim quoted, "He's not a tame lion, you know." He's not safe. He's not under our thumbs. He is the sovereign Lord who created the universe. So why should we sing and dance and clap before such a fearsome being?

Because of Christ, we have the forgiveness of sins. That is why we can not only dare to approach him--Hebrews 4 says that we can confidently and boldly draw near. The Spirit is the seal of our adoption, and we can now call God our Father. This is no longer a mere creature-Creator relationship wherein our proper response is fear and reverence. We are now daughters of God, people called by his name. That inspires joy and glee in his presence. How can we not forget ourselves and love on him?

The Gospel is not just for now--whatever fears or insecurities or inhibitions we have that would keep us from dancing before the Lord will all be removed when we enter eternity. There we will not be hindered by anything, but our love for him will finally be what it ought. For now, because of Jesus, let us boldly draw near to the throne, where we can ask him for the grace to become true, impassioned worshipers.

What would an unbeliever think about your relationship with God if she saw you worshiping? What is the fear that would keep you from worshiping as you want to, and what can you do to overcome it?

Pole Sitting

2010-08-19T06:05:00.000-04:00

There was a very holy man in the 5th century, remembered in the church as Saint Simeon Stylites. He gained extensive fame as a holy man by spending thirty-three years living on top of a ten-foot pole. He was up there by himself until the day he died. He had a few other kooky ideas, too.

People flocked to see him, seeking a few words of wisdom from the man so holy he would live on a pole. I'm not sure I make the connection. Chances are, you're smiling at the idea, which just proves Pastor Steve's message on Sunday: fellowship is what Christians do.

Remember: True devotion to Christ must be evidenced by consistent devotion to Christians!. It's a supernatural fellowship, drawing its source from the Gospel. Fellowship with God is the fuel for fellowship with one another.

The Gospel defines our fellowship--it's sharing with our fellow-believers the things that God has made known to us about himself. In fellowship we are dependent on Jesus and on the grace that comes to us through one another. Fellowship is giving and receiving, the way that the eye serves the hand and the hand serves the eye.

The Gospel determines fellowship's goals: obedience, sanctification, and unity. Our first goal is obedience to the commands of God, which includes the 'one anothering' commands. In sanctification God uses other people to conform us into the image of Christ. We need to be unified the way that individual stones come together and fit to form one building.

So what do you think about these points? Are we as women committed to this kind of fellowship? Or do we have our own personal poles that we're sitting on, separating ourselves from each other in a pretense of holiness? Or perhaps we are the ones at the bottom of the pole, looking up in admiration at the holy one sitting up there, not daring to approach, not hoping to measure up. Let's not be so silly.

The Hiding Place (3)

2010-08-13T10:20:00.000-04:00

One of my favorite lessons in the Hiding Place is when Betsie determines to thank God in obedience to 1 Thessalonians 5:18 - give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you..

They have just arrived at a concentration camp in the heart of Germany. Conditions are brutal. If it were me, I might choose to forget that 1 Thess. 5:18 existed and go with an impreccatory Psalm, calling down divine fire on my enemies. But they offer thanksgiving, and at first they really do find legitimate things to be grateful for--they are together and they have a Bible. Under the circumstances, those things are miraculous.

Then Betsie thanks God for the fleas in the dorm. Can you imagine? Fleas were no more appealing then than they are today. And for months they suffer because of the fleas, until Betsie discovers that those disgusting fleas are the sole reason why she can hold a Bible study undisturbed. No guard would set foot in the dorm because of the fleas. Suddenly Corrie finds that she too, with a whole heart, can thank God for the fleas. God didn't change the fleas; he changed her heart to see the fleas as God's servants divinely placed to bring about Gospel-good.

God is sovereign over the big things. He's also sovereign over the tiny little things. In any situation, his word remains unchanged: rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

God the Sovereign Potter

2010-08-12T06:25:00.002-04:00

Pastor Scott in his message on Sunday urged that if we take any one nugget away from his message, it would be the understanding that God is the Potter, free to do whatever he desires with whatever he created, which includes you and me. We are not ruled by chance, whim, or circumstance, but by the God who is so powerful that he created the universe. Since he is the creator of all, he has the right to do with any part of his creation whatever he desires.

We read on Sunday from Jeremiah 18 that God does not just reserve the right to intervene when he chooses, but that he is in total and complete control over all creation at all times. He is good and glorious, and the reverence that we owe him is not what an mere earthly tyrant demands. If we were not so blinded by sin and depraved in heart, mankind would find him irresistibly delightful. It is for our good that he reveals himself to us as Sovereign Lord.

Saturday night I finished reading a book by Philip Ryken called Courage to Stand (P&R, 2009). It is a walk through Jeremiah, and there are two passages from it that came to my mind when Pastor Scott preached on God the Potter. The first is a warning about the Potter, and the second is the comfort found in the Potter.

Jeremiah's message is about judgment. The picture of the pot on the potter's wheel is not meant to be comforting. Like much modern art, it is meant to be disturbing. Jeremiah's message is about clay in the hands of an agry Potter. If God can do whatever he wants, then he has the right to destroy you for your sins. God is the one who brought you into this world, and he can take you out of it. Until you recognize this, you have not fully reckoned with the sovereignty of God. (p. 101)

"No one has ever been able to make a clay pot that is just a clay pot. Every pot is also an art form. Pottery is always changing its shape as potters find new proportions, different ways to shape the pot in pleasing combinations of curves. There is no pottery that besides being useful does not also show evidence of beauty.... It is one of the most functional items in life; it is also one of the most beautiful." It takes a patient artist to make a pot that is beautiful as well as useful. It takes the kind of potter Jeremiah watched, one who refuses to give up on his work. When there was a flaw in the clay, he did not throw it away; he worked it into something else. (p. 107)

God's sovereignty cannot be treated lightly. Are you willing to submit to his complete control? Do you trust him to do his work well?

This question is rhetorical: who has the better point of view when looking at your life--you or God? Who therefore, of the two of you, is the only one qualified to direct your path?

The Hiding Place (2)

2010-08-06T07:42:00.001-04:00

It's quite possible I'm the only person who's never read The Hiding Place.

I heard about it enough to figure that I pretty much knew the story already, but even a few pages in I realized I had no idea.

For some reason it was my understanding that the war took place while Corrie Ten Boom was a girl. I always thought that made for a pretty amazing story--a young girl being willing to risk her life when she had so much ahead of her. And then I found out that Corrie was actually around 50 when she first got involved with the Dutch underground. And I actually think that makes it even more compelling.

It's often said that when we're young, there's not a care in the world. As we age, we tend to get more stuck in our ways, more comfortable with how things are right now, and sometimes even really wrapped up in ourselves. Life isn't so much about play dates and friends and sleepovers and birthday parties anymore. So I feel like it's pretty commendable that in her older years, when it would have been easy for her to make the excuse that she needed to tend to her family, keep up with her father's watch business, etc., instead she stuck her neck out.

But I think Corrie might have been the first to say that her story didn't really reveal anything remarkable about her. Rather, it served to reveal the character of our remarkable God.

In the midst of at least twice giving her a vision of her fate (a cart carrying her and her family being drawn by four black horses), God also gave her the ingenuity, the strength, the perseverance, the will, and the selflessness to essentially run Haarlem's underground operation, and most importantly the faith to trust Him in all things.

May we not shrink back from the things we are called to do, whatever and whenever they might be, but instead embrace them under the covering of our loving, sovereign God.

The Hiding Place

2010-07-29T20:42:00.004-04:00

If you've never read this book, you need to. This book is about two believing sisters who hide Jews from the Nazis. It is about their arrest and their imprisonment in a concentration camp. It is about God's call upon these lives to do the unthinkable. It's about God giving incredible amounts of courage, strength, ingenuity, love and divine protection.

It is also about their father. I love reading about Corrie and Betsy but after reading through this book a second time, I was especially drawn to "Father." This was a gentle watch salesman and repairman. He was a widower living with daughters. He was a godly man who was willing to risk everything (and he did) for God. His influence on the lives of his daughters is felt on every page.

Here's one example of the kind of wisdom he had in answering a difficult question from his little girl Corrie:

He turned to look at me, as he always did when answering a question, but to my surprise he said nothing. At last he stood up, lifted his traveling case from the rack over our heads, and set it on the floor.

'Will you carry it off the train, Corrie?" he said.

I stood up and tugged at it. It was crammed with the watches and spare parts he had purchased that morning.

"It's too heavy," I said.

"Yes," he said. "And it would be a pretty poor father who would ask his little girl to carry such a load. It's the same way, Corrie, with knowledge. Some knowledge is too heavy for children. When you are older and stronger you can bear it. For now you must trust me to carry it for you."

And I was satisfied. More than satisfied - wonderfully at peace. There were answers to this and all my hard questions - for now I was content to leave them in my father's keeping.

Wise words indeed. Oh that we would have wise words for our children that would equip them for the many dangers, toils and snares that await them in this world.

Quote

2010-07-26T07:20:00.003-04:00

I don't have time to write a post this morning so I thought I'd share this quote taken from girltalk. The girltalk blog is definitely worth checking out these days as they are drawing from their archives to give us some simple but profound truths about marriage. Here's one:

[Feminism] is mixed up with a muddled idea that women are free when they serve their employers but slaves when they help their husbands. -- G.K. Chesterton, The Collected Works of G.K. Chesterton, vol. 4, p. 440

Are you a soldier?

2010-07-21T13:00:00.000-04:00

An adorable little Chinese girl came up to me last night at work and asked me, "Are you a soldier?"

"I'm a soldier in God's army," I told her.

"Do you have weapons?"

I chatted with her for a few minutes about what kinds of weapons God gives us. Then she exhausted both her boldness and her questions and ran back to her friends.

What she didn't know is that I have been reading William Gurnall's classic The Christian in Complete Armour, a book based on Ephesians 6:10-18. It was a sweet reminder that this book, which is not easy on my flesh, is applicable to me. I am not wandering aimlessly through life, living by chance, but I am a soldier in the service of the conquering King. Here's just an excerpt from Gurnall that will hopefully encourage all of us.

The strength of an earthly general lies in his troops -- he flies upon their wings. If their feathers get clipped or their necks broken, he is helpless. But in the army of saints, the strength of the whole host lies in the Lord of hosts. God can overcome His enemies without help from anyone, but His saints cannot so much as defend the smallest outpost without His strong arm.

Even in acts of worship our strength is in the Lord. Consider prayer. Would we pray? Where will we find topics for our prayers? Alas, 'We know not what we should pray for as we ought' (Rom. 8:26). Let us alone, and we will soon pray ourselves into some temptation or other, and beg for the very thing God knows we should not have. To protect us, then, God puts words in our mouths (Hos. 14:2).

The same is true in hearing the Word. We have been instructed to hear the Word preached, but what will it profit unless God opens the ears of our understanding.

First the Spirit of God moves upon our spirit; then we know for a surety that our strength is in the Lord.

William Gurnall The Christian in Complete Armour, vol. 1, abridged by Ruthanne Garlock, et al. (Carlisle, PA: Banner of Truth, 2009) 34-36.

Tubby's

2010-07-18T15:33:00.010-04:00

We just got home from Maine Saturday morning, 3:00 AM. Thank you all for your prayers for us while we were away. We missed you. We really did. But we did have a wonderful time. It was a time that was very complete.

Between camp ministry and spending time with my family our days were full but Tim and I sacredly guarded 3 days to ourselves to roam the mountains and coastline of Maine.

Now I am home and aware that I need to whip my body back into submission. Our van made a few too many stops at ice cream shops. Mainers have a love for ice cream. They have ice cream stands like we have WAWA.

Maybe it's because I was born in Maine that I enjoy ice cream so much. I'm not referring to store bought cartons of ice cream. I mean real homemade ice cream stand ice cream. Thankfully I have a husband who was only too eager to satisfy my craving.

One ice cream stand we discovered, stands above the rest. It is called, Tubby's. It was clean, attractive, creative and provided seating by a lake. Their ice cream was incredibly good, with both typical and unique flavors. And..... they offered free samples for as many flavors as one wanted!!! These samples were served in cute little 1" wafer cones (I got very excited about those).

Our first day there, after sampling some flavors and settling on my choice of Java Moreo I debated on whether to have a baby bear cone, or a Mama bear cone. Thankfully God gave me enough sense to know a Papa bear or a Tubby bear cone was out of the question. At first I chose a Mama bear, but then thought I'd downsize to a baby bear. Before my last bite I was regretting that decision. So the next day (that's right - the very next day), I went straight for the Mama bear size only this time I had Holy Moly (a combination of peanut butter and molasses - sounds weird but it is a sweet smooth peanut butter flavor).

Isn't God good to give us days of rest and days of feasting? And though I'm aware there were times when I ate more ice cream than I should have (next year I am determined to stick with the baby bear size), I'm thankful for daily grace to eat and drink with a thankful heart.

Safely Home (4)

2010-07-16T19:00:00.003-04:00

In this last post about our first summer novel, Safely Home, I thought I'd share a few sections that really stuck out to me.

In this first passage, the martyrs in heaven are speaking to each other about the suffering of the church:

"Day and night the watchers cry out to our King, but still he has not moved his hand."

"He has moved his hand every moment of every day and in the darkest passes of night," Li Manchu said. "But not as we always wish, nor in ways clearly visible to us--and certainly not visible to them."

"But his is a throne of justice. How can justice be so long postponed?"

"His is also a throne of grace. The grace is not only to the persecuted, but to the persecutors. If the postponement of justice for one more day brings more image-bearers--whether persecuted or persecutors--to grace, so be it."

"You are right, of course. Even here, the waiting is not easy. But it is far harder for those still trapped in the Shadowlands."

"Yes. But with the King a thousand years is as a day. Ask the earth-dwellers a million years from now if their momentary suffering was an acceptable exchange for eternal glory." (248)

In this section, the King is having a conversation with the archangel Michael about the continued suffering of the church and withholding of judgment:

"The moment I bring justice and relieve all suffering is the moment earth's inhabitants' eternal destiny is sealed. Not one more shall be joined to me then. To 'end it all,' as you say, will also mean to end the offer of grace--a grace I delight to offer, a violent grace that cost me dearly."

"We do not want the wicked to go unpunished."

"They will not."

"We do not want the righteous to go unrewarded."

"They will not." ....

"We want your servants to be comforted."

"I comfort them every hour. And the day of eternal comfort will surely come, enfolding them like a warm blanket."

"Your servants wish also to take away the cause of your grief. for we see how you suffer the pains inflicted on your bride."

The King nodded. "Their passions are right and pure. I have borne my heartache as a choice. It too shall be relieved when the last of my suffering children is delivered." ....

"They cry out to you, day and night. They plead for your intervention, for your return. I hear many ask, 'Where is he? Does he not care? Why does he allow us to suffer?'"

The King sighed. "Too quickly do they summon providence to the court of reason. The night will last only so long before it is swallowed whole by the morning. The longer their night lasts, the more they dream of the dawn.... They don't understand that I am not only at work here, preparing a place for them, but I am at work there, preparing them for that place." (314-315)

And finally, just one quote from a conversation between Li Quan and his friend Ben Fielding:

"Temporary suffering is a small price to pay for eternal happiness." (318)

It may be a novel, but I will say that I learned a lot about the realities of the persecuted church, grace, forgiveness, and even God himself. We'd love to hear about what you've taken away from the book.

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We'll start our next summer novel, The Hiding Place, by Corrie Ten Boom, on Monday, July 26. Ask Bruce if he can get it, check it out at your local library, or pick it up from Amazon.

Motherhood

2010-07-14T16:25:00.003-04:00

Please take a moment to check out this video from a somewhat new site called Deidox, which produces cinematic stories of the modern day Christian journey. This one goes out to all the moms.

http://deidox.com/films/dawn/

Walking with the Wise

2010-07-10T10:00:00.000-04:00

Hey moms - looking for some new Bible-centered, gospel-saturated, truth-full tunes to add to your kids music library? Look no further than Sovereign Grace Music's newest kids album, Walking with the Wise. As the SGM music site says, "Walking with the Wise contains thirteen songs all inspired by Proverbs, and all meant to encourage kids to joyfully follow God’s commands." Sounds good to me!

We just downloaded the CD this weekend and let me tell you, I already think it's great. Here's a little sampling:

1. W-I-S-D-O-M

W-I-S-D-O-M spells wisdom, I need it
W-I-S-D-O-M in Your Word, I find it

2. Where It All Begins

Here's the key to every door
It is when we know the fear of the Lord

3. Nuggets of Gold

Your Word's got nuggets of gold
A treasure for my soul

4. Trust in the Lord

Trust in the Lord with all your heart
And do not lean on your own understanding

5. Make Me Wise

Lord, I want to bring You glory
So I'm asking You to make me wise

6. A Good Friend

A friend will always think of others
A friend will overlook a wrong

7. I Don’t Have to Hide

Jesus died so I don't have to hide anymore

8. To Tell the Truth

You never break a promise
We can trust all You say

9. Lazy Bones

When we work to please the Lord
God will make our plans secure
And He'll be glorified in all we do

10. A Cheerful Heart

Oh Jesus fill me with Your joy
And I will sing Your praise

11. All Ears

When my mouth is jumping at something to say
I'll be all ears

12. A Generous Heart

God has shown us how to give
He offered up His Son so we might live

13. Who Can Say

No one's blameless in God's holy eyes
That's why the Savior came

Hmm... are they sure this is a kids CD? This music not only lays a solid foundation for my son, but encourages and lifts me up in the truths I've already experienced!

Do your kids and yourself a favor and get the CD today.

This Really Cute Story...

2010-07-07T07:00:00.003-04:00

"There's this really cute story in the Bible. It's about this woman named Woman at the Well."

I saw a woman on TV say that last night, and I've had a stomachache ever since. The mental image I got (and some of you worldly people my age will catch this reference--let's repent together) was of Jessica Simpson and her mom shopping and saying "this is cute" about every single thing they liked, which was a lot.

Flip through the pages of Scripture. This is cute. Don't like that. This is cute. This is cute. Look at this--this is cute. No, I don't like that one--it makes me look like a sinner.

The Bible is not cute. Ever see a cute razor-sharp sword? The Word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword. It pierces like a surgeon's scalpel, slicing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow. I've had surgery. It's not cute--it's bloody and painful and you don't just walk away from it, even if your surgeon is the best in the world. It discerns the thoughts and intentions of the heart. That's not cute. That's in the realm of can-I-please-find-a-mountain-to-fall-on-me-terrifying. We have nowhere to run and nowhere to hide from him to whom we must give account. We are completely exposed before God. God knows the depths of my sin. Cute?

Girls. Sisters. I'm so thankful that we are members of a church where we are exhorted to be skilled in the word. We can't let up. There is no excuse that can trump God's command to be skilled in the word of righteousness. It's easy to be sweet Christian girls and women, but sweet personalities will not lead us to the living Christ. We need to search the Scriptures for Christ, or we will lose touch with the real reality.

The Gospel is not a cute story. We are so wicked that it took the death of a perfect Messiah to atone for us. We need to guard our hearts and our minds, lest our understanding become trivial and commonplace. Babies are cute. The Lord Jesus Christ is unspeakably majestic. Summer dresses and sandals are cute. The Bible is a weapon of war. We are in a trench, not a department store. We are soldiers, not shoppers. We need ammunition, not another outfit. May God help us to be wise women, students of his word, believers of every word he has said!

Update on Ava

2010-07-06T14:26:00.005-04:00

I've been keeping tabs on Ava's story since I first posted about it.

I love love love how the Hunter family is handling the situation. Just the other day, they put out a plea on their blog for a research team--basically anyone who could find any kind of GBM cancer treatment that had been done with any kind of success. The word from Josh (Ava's dad) is that they've received all of the resources they can handle and are officially shutting down the research team! They'll be combing over the details while they await a final diagnosis from the doctors and will be praying for wisdom in deciding upon the best course of action for Ava.

I wanted to share just a couple of excerpts from Josh's blog:

Many of you have asked us how Noah is doing. He is doing well. He is fully aware of the challenges ahead and is fired-up about being part of "Team Ava" as we readjust our lives to get her better. He is a great kid and loves his sister. He knows that "Hunters don't quit and Hunter's don't whine". Those two things have been built into him since he was born (just like they were in me)...they will serve him well. He's as ready as any 11 year old can be to join in the battle.

The Onc Doc came in today and said "It may be a few days before we have confirmation of the diagnosis." I said, "No problem, we aren't anxious or worried. It is what it is and we are gonna do what we have to do." He looked perplexed that I wasn't more concerned and then he left the room. What he doesn't know is that I trust God for Ava's health, not whatever plan he and his cohorts put together. God is the healer...the docs just help the body do what God created it to do. I think he forgot that today. All the best docs in the world can't heal a body that isn't supposed to be. They are mere men with an opinion. Granted, they went to school for a million years to form that opinion, but at the end of the day...it's all a best guess.

That's why leaning on God makes most sense. I don't mean sitting idle. I mean trusting Him to lead us on the right path for Ava. I care little who tells me I'm nuts if I am following what God has told me. I don't ever hear an audible voice, but I expect Him to open the doors that need to be open and close the ones that should be closed. My promise is to walk through the open ones with Lisa as we pursue healing for Ava.

Please keep praying for Josh, Lisa, Noah, especially Ava, and the entire Hunter family.

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UPDATE: Ava is home!

We reached milestone 1. Ava is well enough from her surgery to be on her own. We packed up the uhaul and left the hospital at about 1pm today. That was great to get out of there. Ava doesn't miss it one bit. That victory was enough to get us to this moment...the real work begins now.

The second part of the mission is to get Ava well and rid of cancer. Honestly, it's hard to even type that. We know the journey ahead is long and arduous. We pray that we will have the strength to lean on God each day and look for only what He wants from us for that day. I'm not very good at that. Fortunately, Lisa is. So, at least I have someone to look up to.

Safely Home (3)

2010-07-02T15:06:00.004-04:00

How's the reading going?

I'll admit to falling into a similar trap as Gayline did - I have finished the book. An engaging book with long plane rides with long layovers will do that to you.

One thing I'm curious to know is what you've been learning about the persecuted church in China. I will admit to being totally unaware of the history behind the Boxers (mentioned in the book) and so I did a little bit of internet research while we were out in California last week. Tim and I had a great discussion about it.

If you don't know about the Boxers either, I suggest you look it up. Just google "Boxer Rebellion" or "Boxer Uprising." Surprisingly, wikipedia has quite a bit of good information.

So, what has reading Safely Home taught you about the persecuted church in China?

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We'd like to start our next book, The Hiding Place sometime in mid-July. Make sure to place your order with Bruce at the bookstore, or check it out an Amazon.

A Theology of Cherry Pie

2010-07-01T12:11:00.000-04:00

Robbie and I went sour cherry picking on Monday, and last night I turned unappetizingly sour fruits into the most delicious pie filling. You would never want to sit down with a bowl full of sour cherries. They are so sour and tart. Even the most perfect-looking sour cherry is not tempting when you know what's on the inside.

But I took out their hard little hearts, those stony pits, and I washed them clean of the dust that clung to them. I added sugar to them, and after a little while on the stove, they were starting to smell pretty good. I added a cornstarch slurry, which isn't there because it tastes good but because without it, the cherries would just be a runny mess. A little cinnamon, a little almond extract, and these sour cherries are ready to be baked in a delicious, sweet pie.

I can't take much credit--God made the cherry and the sugar cane and the water I used for rinsing and the elements I used for cooking and the taste buds I use for tasting and the mind I used to follow the recipe. I can't make a cherry pie without his enabling. He is a creative, diverse, ordered, good God.

But what's even better is that God is doing to me what I did to the cherries.

Pray for Ava

2010-06-30T15:37:00.004-04:00

I can't help but draw a connection between Psalm 4 and a recent development in the life of an acquaintance of mine.

My friend Joel's 5-year-old niece was diagnosed with a rare form of brain cancer just this week. I went to middle/high school with Joel, and his dad was my pastor for almost all of the years my family lived in Florida. They went in with her complaining of headaches and within 24 hours or so after a CAT scan she was in surgery to remove a tangerine sized tumor. The initial pathology shows that it is not only rare, but especially rare in children, and resistant to traditional methods of cancer treatment.

All that to say, even in the last 4 or 5 days it's been... encouraging? I don't even know what word to use... to see how each member of the family has responded to the crisis (I've been following Josh's blog--the father--and his brothers, Joel's and Isaac's blogs since I got home). They are admitting to deep despair and confusion but also deep trust and confidence in the love of God. As the notes in the ESV Study Bible state, Psalm 4 is a "perfect example of expressing trust amid troubling circumstances." David makes two urgent requests, but sandwiched between them is this recall of his past experience with God: "you have given me relief when I was in distress." The notes continue: "Past experience emboldens the faithful to confident prayer."

As I read on the father's blog today, they are praying and praying. Praying for healing here, but also knowing that there is perfect healing for her in another place, they are confident in a God who heals. Whether that same God chooses to heal in the here and now or in the world to come, one thing is for sure: He will comfort and strengthen them. And they rest in that as much as they can. They are godly people, like those mentioned in verse 3. The Hebrew used there for "godly" is the adjective form of "steadfast love." It means that they are people who trust in God's steadfast love.

Today in my reading from Beside Still Waters, Spurgeon says "God's thoughts are toward you. He is refining you, and He desires your highest good." God loves with a perfect love all those who are His.

Everything He does in our lives, even allowing cancer in our young child, is for our highest good.

Please pray for Ava, her parents Josh and Lisa, and the entire Hunter family.

Safely Home (2)

2010-06-25T11:03:00.001-04:00

Our summer lineup of books has books that aren't so much discourses as they are stories. The beauty about them is that they are chock-full of theology, most of which we pick up without fully realizing. This month we are reading Randy Alcorn's Safely Home. Story? yes. Pure fiction? no.

Moms, have you considered taking advantage of "story" books by reading them out loud to your kids? My mom read books to us when we were kids. The book I most clearly remember is our book for next month, The Hiding Place, which gripped me and still hasn't left me alone. As a youngster I learned a lot more about God from listening to that book than from any "children's" book or video. The exposure to a non-Disney story is a good thing.

I encourage you to make reading a family event. Have someone in charge of the dictionary to look up words you don't know. Be prepared to pause frequently to explain or to talk through themes. Don't wait for them to ask you questions. Ask them the hard questions first. If you have an older child, have him do some of the reading. I think that when the summer has ended, you will look back on your family reading time and see it as a great blessing.

"Hope does not disappoint"

2010-06-23T22:14:00.005-04:00

As Jenn blogged yesterday, every year when June 24th draws near, we both find ourselves thinking about and talking about our mom more than usual.

This June 24th, I find myself thinking about another woman who is facing breast cancer. Joni Eareckson Tada is undergoing surgery on Monday, June 28th to determine the severity of her cancer. Joni, a quadriplegic for more than forty years, is no stranger to suffering.

Many people will ask, 'Hasn't this woman suffered enough?!?!'

Still more will wonder, 'How can a loving God treat His faithful servant in such a way?'

This is what Joni says:
“I’ve often said that our afflictions come from the hand of our all-wise and sovereign God, who loves us and wants what is best for us. So, although cancer is something new, I am content to receive from God whatever He deems fit for me,” she said.

“Yes, it’s alarming, but rest assured that Ken and I are utterly convinced that God is going to use this to stretch our faith, brighten our hope and strengthen our witness to others.”

I'm sure Joni has shed tears over the past few weeks. She has probably had moments full of fear and anxiety. But she is doing what our own pastors at TFC have been exhorting us to do: she is beholding God--the self-revealed God of Scripture.

Her God is bigger than cancer cells. In fact, Joni's God is making cancer cells serve her. She is more than a conqueror of cancer----in Christ!

Let's pray for our sister in the Lord, that she persevere in the faith and triumph through grace.

"Whatever affliction we bear shall be for our soul's gain." --Thomas Case

What Chance?

2010-06-23T07:05:00.006-04:00

This is conjecture and based completely on guesswork with no experience involved--but I would imagine that being a parent can be really, really scary. Just babysitting, to me, has the potential to be frightening. Driving a car with someone else's baby in the backseat is one of the bravest things I've ever done. I can't imagine being the one permanently responsible.

I would think that being a Christian parent in the midst of a ragingly ungodly culture--correct me if I'm wrong--would have to be pretty scary. You do your best to train, to shape, to nurture, but you know that slavering outside your door is a horde of enemies just waiting to snatch your little one up. Even scarier would be to know that you are going to be separated. The world is going to break down your door and snatch your child away, and you can't stop it.Your time of influence is over. Do you then give up hope?

In order for her baby to even live, Jochabed had to give him to a pagan princess, who would train him to serve a pantheon of gods. What chance did Moses have to hear God's voice?

Hannah prayed for his birth, and then she had to give him up and hand him over to a notoriously wicked pair of surrogate brothers and their selfish, foolish father. What chance did Samuel have to learn righteousness?

He was carried away into exile, a slave in the court of the most barbaric, ungodly ruler the world knew of. His parents might have been killed in the invasion, or they might have been carried away themselves, never to see their boy again. What chance did Daniel have to serve Jehovah?

Parents are a wonderful gift, and you are so important in the life of your child. But isn't it good to know that God is greater, that you can trust him to take care of your son or daughter, no matter what happens to you? You might live until you're ninety and have years and years to be a godly and wise influence on your child, and I hope you do.

My mom wasn't planning on dying when I was eleven. We had planned out our future together. I was going to be her housekeeper when I grew up. God's mercy in giving her cancer gave us time to prepare, and she never once seemed to be frightened about my future. She trusted God and knew that He is good.

I think about it a lot this time of year, because Thursday marks the twelfth anniversary of her heavenly birthday. I'm so thankful that God is greater than my mom. She is dead--He is alive. She could control my behavior--He can change my heart. She did not make me become a Christian. Jesus saved me by substituting Himself in my place, bearing my sin, paying my debt, giving me the gift of salvation, and entering heaven in my behalf. He's going to bring me there someday, and I'll stand next to my mom and we'll praise Him for what HE has done. Not only could Mom not save me--she did not have to.

I love this final stanza from John Newton's hymn "The Lord Will Provide." It reminds me of twelve years ago around this time

When life sinks apace and death is in view,
This word of his grace shall comfort us through:
No fearing or doubting with Christ on our side,
We hope to die shouting the Lord will provide

Possessions

2010-06-22T15:37:00.007-04:00

I read yesterday that if I am a believer, Christ is mine, and I must take hold of all that is mine in him. "Why are we so dispirited by infirmities? We know that Jehovah is our strength and our song, but we do not possess our possessions" (Beside Still Waters, by Charles Spurgeon).

I'm in the midst of getting everything in order for our vacation that starts tomorrow. Tim and I are headed to Sequoia National Park, CA and the little guy will be staying at the Grandaddy and Granmommy's house.

On top of packing for us (which I have to fit into two carry-ons since we don't want to deal with checking luggage at a busy LA airport), I'm trying to organize everything for the little guy, including clothes, food, diapers, schedules, etc. etc. I'm also trying to fit into our luggage a few things my mom asked me to bring to them, and burning CDs of sermons for them since internet is spotty on the road and streaming doesn't work so well. And making numerous lists, triple and quadruple checking them, and then double-checking my triple and quadruple checking.

Whew!

Am I bringing this up for your sympathy? By no means! As I was sitting here writing the titles of all TFC's Behold Your God series on the CDs for my parents, I was reminded of all that we've heard about God, especially these last two weeks on God as creator and sustainer and the God who never sleeps.

I am bordering on overwhelmed with my pre-vacation to-do list. And I'm tired--no one in this house slept well last night. God is never overwhelmed by his to-do list. He could take care of it with a twitch of the tip of his pinkie finger. And he is never tired! Especially for us moms, that seems like such a foreign idea!

But you know what else is cool about all that? That is the God who sustains us. I am so grateful that I do not have to rely on my own strength to accomplish anything, including getting through each moment.

Today I am trying to possess these three truths instead of just knowing them. What truths about God do you need to possess?

Changes

2010-06-21T07:13:00.005-04:00

A woman is never quite the same after pregnancy, and birthing a baby. Her life (physically and in every other way) is forever changed.

So it is with trials.

I could go on for weeks on this topic but this will be my last post. Many excellent theological books, hymns and biographies have been written to equip believers to be spiritually prepared to face trials and to comfort believers who are presently living in trial. I want to encourage everyone to get hold of books like: Knowing God, by J.I. Packer; Be Still My Soul - 25 Classic and Contemporary Reading on the Problem of Pain, edited by Nancy Guthrie); The God I Love - a memoir, by Joni Eareckson Tada; and Beside Still Waters - devotional readings on comfort, by Charles Spurgeon. These are just a few of the many book written that will strengthen a heart that is hurting with the solid truths of God's word.

But these are the best words which help bring into perpective the changes God has in mind for the believer facing trials:

Therefore, since we have been justified (free from God's wrath), we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us (Romans 5:1-5).

What have you been reading that God has used to help change you (for good) in your trial? How is God preparing you for future trial? I'd love to know.

Safely Home

2010-06-17T19:36:00.007-04:00

Time for true confessions. I just finished reading this book. I couldn't help myself. It was calling my name every night. It pulled me in and I could not resist. I let it happen.

I started reading back in May, rather innocently. I thought to myself, "let me see what this book is like. I'll just read a little. I just want a little introduction. I don't want to get ahead of the book club. I'll just read a few pages."

That's how it happened. I finished it this week. Do I feel guilty? No. Not at all. I'm just trying to decide if I should read it again with everyone else. Why not, you can never get too much of a good thing.

Despite what I said about getting pulled into the book, I will say that I thought it started a tad slow. I also thought the writing seemed a bit awkward. But either the writing got better, or I was so pulled into the storyline I didn't notice it after a few chapters. I was hooked.

The thing about this book is its believability. Though a novel, it is based on real characters.

The city I've called Pushan is fictitious. As far as I know, there is no Pushan in the area I've described. If there is, I've never been there and have no knowledge of it. While many things in this book have actually happened in one way or another, I have made up the story. Still, I have attempted to keep it authentic and true to life in as many details as possible. Nearly all my characters are fictitious. Some are composites of several real people. Whenever I was thinking of someone in particular I changed his name and life details so it would be impossible to identify him.

(Notes from the Author pg. xi)

This book is a novel. It is fictitious but it is true. This book tells the story of the persecuted church in China and it tells us of heaven. It is soul stirring, challenging and comforting.

I hope you enjoy your reading.

I'll be waiting for you when you are finished and we'll start the next book together.

He Will Heal (Hosea 6:1)

2010-06-15T16:48:00.005-04:00

I read this yesterday and thought it fitting for Tim's sermon from Sunday. God made the stars, He knows everything about them, and he provides all they need. If them, then surely you. God cares for you.

I believe that God, who has appointed it, has also measured your trouble, set its bounds, and will bring it to an end. His gracious design is in all your difficulties. Do not think that God deals roughly with His children and gives them needless pain. "He does not afflict willingly, nor grieve the children of men" (Lam. 3:33). "He has torn, but He will heal."

Has not God helped you out of one trouble after another? Do you suppose that He will leave you in this trouble? "He shall deliver you in six troubles, yes, in seven no evil shall touch you" (Job 5:19).

This particular water, in which you are now struggling, is intended and included in this promise, "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you" (Is. 43:2).

It is, I must confess, sometimes difficult to apply the promises to a particular case. Sometimes unbelief fights hard. But remember, unless the promise is applied it is like medicine that is not taken. It may be powerful, but it is worthless unless applied.

Ask for grace, that you may believe while you are still under the cloud. Regardless of how dark the cloud, it contains blessings. "If the clouds are full of rain, they empty themselves upon the earth" (Eccl. 11:3).

(Beside Still Waters, C.H. Spurgeon, page 166)

Temptations in trials (more lessons from labor)

2010-06-14T10:25:00.000-04:00

We've all seen or heard stories of laboring women yelling at their husbands. Words like: "Get out of here! I never want to see your face again... I'll never forgive you for this... this is all your fault" make us laugh. Often when a husband tries to serve his laboring wife nothing he does or says is the right thing. We laugh when we hear these stories because we know (or hope) the wife doesn't really mean what she is saying.

During those moments the wife's verbal lashing is her way of taking the focus off her own pain by placing pain on another person.

No one likes pain. No one likes going through trials. When we do find ourselves in a trial, we are often tempted to become angry, impatient, jealous, and hyper-critical of others. Can you relate to this?

Think with me for a moment will you?

When people have tried to offer you encouragement, an understanding word, an offer for help or prayer, has your perception been skewed so rather than being thankful for the care that the person was extending (however imperfectly) you focus on a word, or a tone, or an "implied" meaning and turn that act of love into a reason to be angry with the person?

Or, have you ever been tempted to become angry, bitter, withdrawn because people didn't do, call, write, or pray enough?

What is going on in our hearts when this happens? We are becoming self-focused; full of self-pity and pride that insists what was spoken or given or offered was not good enough. We think we deserve better.

In our trial we have a desire to control the pain and suffering so in an effort to shift our focus off our pain we find fault in others. Rather than "looking unto Jesus" for our help, and rather than looking into our own hearts for what we need to learn in our trial, we place our attention on others to find some kind of sinful satisfaction that all isn't well in their world either (after all how could they be so thoughtless?).

There are times when people do fail to love and care. But it would be far better for us to extend grace to them and trust that they were not being intentionally hurtful. It would be far better for our soul and theirs if we would pray like Stephen, "forgive them for they know not what they do." So often people do not know how to care in the way we think they should, or they do not know what we want them to say. If they do not know, then even the sincerest attempts to be kind will most likely disappoint you.

Have you ever done or said something wrong to a person in trial? Have you ever missed an opportunity to extend love to a suffering sister? Did you do it intentionally? Probably not. How did the person respond? Did she draw near to you in love and grace, or did she distance herself from you and keep herself in a cocoon of self-pity and bitterness? If you've lived the Christian life for even a short while you've probably experienced both. How did you feel in either case?

Have you ever been the one sinfully judging the intentions of the "caring" person? Like the woman in labor yelling at her husband, have you been the sister inwardly rebelling against the imperfect gesture of love and care? Did you find your soul drying up from unconfessed resentment? Or did you cover it all with love and grace and find your soul expanding in the midst of your trial?

Where do we go with all of this? As always, we run to the cross. There we find forgiveness for the sin of self-pity, anger, and pride.

At the cross we find our perfect example to follow.

For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps. He committed no sin, neither was deceit found in his mouth. When he was reviled, he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly. He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed (1 Peter 2:21-24).

If Christ was betrayed by a friend, and forsaken by the hundreds who had once loved him when the miracles were flowing, if he was beaten nigh unto death and then hung on a tree to die, all without a word of complaint, then we can call on Him to help us walk through our trials without lashing out at others.

Dear sisters, let us love and care for others in their trials as we would want them to love and care for us in our trials.

And may we forbear and forgive others who we think have failed us in our trials as we would want them to forbear and forgive us when we fail them in their trials.

As with anything we cannot do this on our own. Our sinful hearts will always lead us away from love and grace. But by His grace let us keep "drawing near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need" (Hebrews 4:16).

Uprooting Anger (5)

2010-06-11T10:52:00.004-04:00

Uprooting Anger has proven to be an edifying read. As Brooke put it----everyone needs to read this book!

I guarantee that you will see yourself on the pages of this book even if you don't think that you have an 'anger problem.' Anger reveals itself in sooooo many ways.

One of the outlets of anger that Jones reveals is concealed anger. I think that women are particularly good at concealing their anger. Yep, we just let it come to a steady boil right under the surface, but we look fine on the outside.

How many times has your friend, coworker, spouse, child, pastor upset you and then asked, "What's wrong?"

"I'm fine!" Meanwhile, you're outraged that they don't know what has upset you. You fall into the trap of telling lies to yourself ('they don't even care about me...can't they see I'm upset?!?!').

It is all self-preserving behavior. You want to protect yourself from being hurt more than you want to reconcile with a fellow sinner. I am G-U-I-L-T-Y!

We need the cross. When we cling to Christ and follow His word, we can be free to humble ourselves and dare I say, become vulnerable for the sake of the gospel. The Lord will be there to comfort you when you feel ravaged by the world (and sometimes the church)--it will happen.

Living the gospel-centered life is at once full of joy and full of pain. You will feel deeply about people and that will result in excruciating pain at times.

Do you remember how Gayline used the imagery of pregnancy and labor as a metaphor for life? It is a perfect metaphor.

When someone hurts you think of it as a birth pang, a contraction. You will experience countless injuries from loved ones and strangers throughout your life.

You cannot do anything to change that. Only God is sovereign.

What you can do is monitor your own heart. Anger concealed turns into bitterness which poisons the soul.

Don't worry about 'them.' Worry about 'you.' Think of the day that you will stand before the Lord and give an account for your thoughts. Do your thoughts reflect Christ? Examine yourself.

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Please note we'll be starting our summer reading on Monday, June 14. We've chosen three novels for easy and fun but faith-grounded beach or poolside reading. Be sure to stop by the bookstore this Sunday to pick up a copy. Or click on the link in the right hand column to order from Amazon. I've heard good things and can't wait to get started!

Pure Joy

2010-06-09T13:48:00.001-04:00

Fill in the blank:

"Consider it PURE JOY whenever you ___________________."

This is one of those bizarre paradoxes that the Bible throws at us. It's the kind where it sounds fine just reading it, but then one day it stands out to you that this makes no sense at all. James 1:2 says to consider it pure JOY, the kind of thing we get excited about and that makes it easy to do whatever it is you have to do because you’re so soul-delighted that laughter giggles up from the bottom of your belly whenever ...

... you face trials? Of many kinds?

Left by itself, it makes no sense. It's kind of macho-tough, laughing in the face of difficulty for no particular stated reason at all. Just be happy, keh? You're a Christian and Christians are happy, so be happy, keh?

Isn't God good to give us reasons, facts, indicatives upon which to base His instructions, commands, imperatives? Even in nature, He gives us illustrations. You don't tell a woman in labor to just enjoy herself in her pain, but you remind her that soon she's going to have a baby in her arms. You don't tell a person gasping halfway up a mountain to just relax and enjoy themselves—you remind them that if they keep going, they're going to reach a spectacular summit.

Similarly through James, God says, "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

And then, "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him."

Pure joy. May He give us that joy today and in the rest of our lives until the day when He gives us the crown of life.

Summer days...

2010-06-08T15:04:00.004-04:00

As we move into summer (hasn't the weather been fantastic these last couple of days?!), I've been thinking about memories made and created. There seem to be so many more opportunities during the summer because there's no school, the weather's great, and for the most part, people are ready to DO something after being cooped up all winter.

Last summer's memories with the little guy included a trip to Denver to see my family, splashing in the blow-up pool in the backyard (not to mention the countless trips up and down the little slide attached to it!), and his first birthday party.

We're already on a roll this summer: the little guy's uncle came to visit over Memorial Day weekend, a drum set, the church yard sale, and this Saturday, his first trip to the beach.

What are your summer memories as a child? What summer memories have you made with your own family? What memories do you hope to make this summer? We'd love to hear from you!

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Please note we'll be starting our summer reading on Monday, June 14. We've chosen three novels for easy and fun but faith-grounded beach or poolside reading. Be sure to email Bruce to have him order your copy of Randy Alcorn's Safely Home, and stop by the bookstore this Sunday to pick it up. Or click on the link in the right hand column to order from Amazon. I've heard good things and can't wait to get started!

Falling in Love Again (Guest Post)

2010-06-07T11:36:00.002-04:00

This morning I was awakened early after only a few hours of sleep. I felt the need to pray for someone I know who I love to pieces, but who is floundering in her faith. What the Lord prompted me to pray is that He would become the "pearl of great price" in her life. That she would fall in love with her Savior.

I pray that for myself and for all of us. Anything this world has to offer is worthless compared to what we have in and from our Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Why I cling to anyone or anything else is insanity and yet I do. Father forgive me.

Since I was up I drove to Seaside Park and watched the sunrise. It was gorgeous. And as an added bonus I found lots of sea glass and small pretty shells. He loves us so very much.

Today I read 1 Timothy 3 and 4. The verse that spoke to my heart was 4:14-16..."Do not neglect the gift that is in you, which was given to you by prophecy with the laying on of the hands of the eldership. Meditate on these things: give yourself entirely to them, that your progress may be evident to all. Take heed to yourself and to the doctrine. Continue in them, for in doing this you will save both yourself and those who hear you."

How many times have I become complacent/compromised my "living out" what I believe. Someone is always watching or listening to us. I MUST give more and more of my time to prayer and reading and meditating on His Word so I can make a positive impact, no matter how small, in the sphere of influence He has placed me in.

Sharon Misiak

Uprooting Anger (4)

2010-06-04T14:04:00.004-04:00

How's the reading going? I know the book's been helpful to me, so I've got a few quick questions for you today to see how it's helping you.

Do you (like me) often find yourself struggling with "legitimate" anger? Maybe your husband isn't the spiritual leader you hoped he'd be, or your kids misbehave more than they listen. Or maybe there's someone at church who's said unkind things to you. You feel like you have the "right" to be angry. How has the definition of anger in chapter one and the discussion on real righteous anger in chapter two helped you?

When it comes to how you handle your anger, are you a venter or a bottler? What did you find helpful in the explanations of sinful revealing in chapter five and sinful concealing in chapter six?

Do you struggle with anger against God? Maybe you do and you're not aware of it. What insights were you able to pull from chapter seven? What about anger against yourself? Are you a self-condemner; judge and jury to your own sin as if it were all about you? What encouragements were you able to draw from chapter eight?

Do you live with an angry person? Or maybe someone has come to you asking for help with their anger. What did you find most helpful in chapter nine?

Have you, like so many, bought into the idea that anger is a normal thing? That because it's so commonplace even in Christian circles it's really not that big of a deal? How did chapter ten challenge that perspective?

A question in there for everyone... so what's your anger issue?

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Please note we'll be starting our summer reading on Monday, June 14. We've chosen three novels for easy and fun but faith-grounded beach or poolside reading. Be sure to stop by the bookstore this Sunday and pick up or order a copy of Randy Alcorn's Safely Home. I've heard good things and can't wait to get started!

Learning how to listen

2010-06-02T13:45:00.001-04:00

My grandpa got a new hearing aid recently. This one actually works really well, but he still can't hear any of our conversations. Although he can physically hear the sounds, he has forgotten how to listen. He asks you to repeat things that he clearly heard (but he didn't hear a word of it). In his own admission, he has to learn how to hear all over again.

We have all been guilty at one time or another of hearing without listening. On my drive to work, I try to listen to sermons or lectures, but I often find myself just hearing it while my mind is ten miles away. Listening can be really hard. Listening is active, while hearing is merely passive. I see it all over: kids not listening to parents, parents not listening to kids, husbands and wives, employers and employees, customers and workers, friends, television and viewer, computer and user--information is exchanged and lives are shared, but a lot of it goes right past us.

Here is my practical question - how do I really listen to others, actively participating in the exchange even though my mouth is shut? I have a few ideas. What are your suggestions?

Spiritually, my soul is sobered by Hebrews 4:2 - "For good news came to us just as to them, but the message they heard did not benefit them, because they were not united by faith with those who listened."

Future Grace (Guest Post)

2010-05-31T07:00:00.004-04:00

(A few weeks ago Brooke asked Pat if she would fill in for me when I was preoccupied with many things. Here is her post. Thank you Pat!)

This past week our ladies' Bible study at Colette's finished for the summer months. We have completed the book of Acts. As I was preparing the final lesson having looked back at the obvious providential hand of God, I was reminded that none of the Apostles or Paul and his companions knew what the next 30 years would be like. We have the benefit of seeing the whole story but they didn't. We also live in a story that is part of a bigger story and we don't know what the next chapter will be.

As I prepared my study I became aware of a sense of being "downcast" in my soul. What was it that was tugging at me? I realized that I had over the last several days been allowing some anxieties to roll around in my head. Not over anything I was dealing with today but some things I might deal with... perhaps in the next 30 years. Am I confident in God's sovereignty? Absolutely! So what was happening?

The Spirit directed me to an essay by John Piper about future grace. That was where I was getting tripped up. Like the Israelites in the account of the Exodus, I was trying to gather tomorrow's manna today and it was becoming maggot infested. The lesson I still needed to be reminded of through the narrative of Acts is that living by faith means I believe the grace I need for tomorrow will be there. That is the hope that will sustain me all the remaining days of my life. When Paul was at some of his lowest times grace showed up in an angel or the Lord himself. The grace I need tomorrow may not come in such dramatic forms but it will come nonetheless.

"Why so downcast, O my soul? Put your trust in the Lord" (and in future grace).

by Pat Bowditch

Contractions of the soul

2010-05-30T16:28:00.013-04:00

Last week I wrote about keeping Christ as our focal point during trials, just as a woman in labor uses a focal point to keep her mind off the pain of her contractions. This week I want to write about those contractions and the good that those contractions produce.

Whether you're a mom or not; whether you've birthed your children or adopted them, who doesn't love the sight of a newborn baby? Who doesn't get emotional watching a movie with a birthing scene, especially the part when that baby is placed in the mother's arms? Apart from becoming born again is there any greater miracle?

We all know this miracle comes at great cost. It is literally through blood, sweat and tears that a baby is brought into the world.

I remember eight hours into the 16 hour laboring process wondering if I could go any longer. I remember feeling like I had to give up. There was just no way I could go on, I thought. But there was no going back. If I wanted this baby (and even if I didn't) there was no way I could change my mind. That baby had to come out, and I had to endure the contractions to get it out.

I also remember when I was expecting David, at age 38 (5 1/2 years after my previous pregnancy), wondering if I'd remember how to do labor and delivery. I remember waking up at night with the irrational fear that I wouldn't be able to do it again.

But all those fears had to be laid aside and I had to remember I had a job to do. I had been called to carry and birth this life. I had to remember if God had called me to this, He would provide me with all that I would need to fulfill this calling.

Spiritual contractions are the same way.

"Life is pain, your highness. Anyone who tells you otherwise is trying to sell you something." (the man in black)

We live in a fallen world. Until Christ returns or we go to heaven we will face "many dangers, toils and snares" that bring great pain. Sometimes we cry: "how long oh Lord?" sometimes we inaudibly groan: "I can't do it any longer." Sometimes we plead in prayer for the pain to stop. But the pain doesn't stop. It may subside for a while but when it returns we wonder if we can endure it again, or remember how to get through it.

But God gives us all that we need for our spiritual contractions. Here are the verses that I have had to remember during these painful times:

"So we do not lose heart. Though our outer nature is wasting away, our inner nature is being renewed day by day. For this slight momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, so we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient but the things that are unseen are eternal" (2 Cor. 4:17).

"Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good for those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son in order that he might be the firstborn among many brothers. And those whom he predestined he also called, and those whom he called he also justified, and those whom he justified he also glorified." (Romans 8:27-30),

"Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning." (Psalm 30:5).

In these verses there is something we can hang on to. When the contractions of life that squeeze our hearts are over, when trials have completed God's intended purposes, there is an eternal glory, and a joy that awaits us in heaven. And even now there is good that is being accomplished through our trials. When the contractions are over, we will weep with joy for what God has done.

How have you found these promises (or others) to help you through your trials?

When Momma Ain't Happy (Uprooting Anger 4)

2010-05-27T09:12:00.009-04:00

Do you have a happy home? By this I mean do the members of your family generally interact with each other with love, and respectful communication? Do you realize what an important part you as the woman of the house have in this? I'm sure you've heard the phrase, "When Momma ain't happy ain't nobody happy." It's true.

How would your husband and children describe you? As an angry woman or a woman who communicates with truth and grace?

Do you build your house up with kind words or do you tear down your house with your temper?

How do you handle unmet expectations? Do you give it over to God and have all necessary conversations with the individuals involved or do you yell, rant and rave?

When you are disappointed by someone do you draw near to them with humility and grace or do you quietly stew and withdraw? Our family members feel very keenly our negative (sinful) emotions. I remember as a child feeling the distance from my mother when she was upset about something. I usually never knew what was bothering her but I always thought it was about me. Children don't like to feel emotionally separated from their mother. But if they feel it often enough, or long enough, children will eventually distance themselves from their mother. This is one of the sad consequences of sinful anger.

In his book, Uprooting Anger, Robert Jones gives us a lot of biblical help for addressing anger. Though most of the examples in the book are taken from the marriage relationship there is good news for us all. This is in no way a book on marriage. It is a book on anger - a temptation we all face. Robert D. Jones tells us there is a way to process the sins in our hearts, the sins committed against us by people and the trials that come our way that tempt us to be angry with God.

Because I am a woman and I know the temptation women (including myself) have towards anger I cannot say it strongly enough: women need to read this book!! This book is founded on biblical truth and not pop psychology. This book provides many practical helps (for example, after forty-five minutes of working on this post, I lost all my work. Having just been reminded by Mr. Jones about responding to unmet expectations in a godly way, I was helped to let it go and find comfort in God's sovereign rule over lost time.)

If you are not sure if you are an angry person, here's a challenging assignment (one which I did several years ago): Ask your husband, children, father, or roommate if they are ever afraid to tell you something for fear of your response. And if they are afraid, what are they afraid of? It could be revealing.

Whatever the answer I hope you keep reading Uprooting Anger. It may make all the difference between an angry momma and a happy momma, or a happy home and an angry home.

Know Your Enemy

2010-05-26T23:57:00.007-04:00

Common war strategy says to know your enemy in order to be able to counter his attacks and gain victory--know his strategies, his strengths, his weaknesses. The Apostle Paul seems to assume that Christians become very familiar with their enemy--Satan (2 Corinthians 2:11)--and his methods.

We've been looking at our current RMMR verses--Ephesians 6:10-20--which give us our instructions for battle, so to speak.

There are countless ways in which Satan attacks the church, some of them are obvious, while others are more subtle. One of my college professors, Dr. Jerry Hullinger, has studied much on the topic of spiritual warfare and has listed five (of the many) ways in which Satan shoots 'fiery darts' in our direction. The following are notes taken from Dr. Hullinger's chapel message called "The Five Schemes of Satan."

Scheme 1: the lie which distorts the nature of the Christian life--no more battles, struggles, storms; thinking it abnormal to struggle with sin, go through hardships

Scheme 2: the lie of sensationalism--looking for a 'quick-fix' instead of consistently applying the first principles of spiritual health; can't seem to 'defeat' sin

Scheme 3: a series of lies which will get us, as God's children, to belittle the cross; tries to persuade us that we have committed a sin that God won't forgive (willful sin, repeated sin...); think we have to do something to merit God's forgiveness

Scheme 4: the lie that tries to persuade us that we are being short-changed in the Christian life; the original lie; exchanging the glory of God for the 'broken cisterns' of this world (Jer. 3)

Scheme 5: the slow approach (multi-year plan); Satan is content to plant seeds all throughout our lives and wait for them to germinate and grow; 'one sin doesn't matter,' 'I'm strong enough to be exposed to certain things'; nibble around the edges, develop a taste for sin

Have you ever been taken as a 'prisoner of war' by any of these schemes??? (I have--all five!)

It has proven an immense help to study Satan's strategies. I am more consistently able to recognize them when confronted by them. Satan never tires of developing new strategies so we must persevere in our battle against the wiles of the devil. And we know, we do it through Christ.

"May God help us to be ever vigilant, walking in the victory that Christ has already provided for us!" --Dr. Hullinger

No Reason to Shrink

2010-05-26T07:00:00.001-04:00

Our RMMR memory verses for May: Ephesians 6:10-11
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.

I love these verses, particularly verse 10. Finally, be strong... Before I even have time to protest that I can't or become frustrated because I can't, it says "in the Lord and in the strength of His might." This is such a benevolent command. Who but a loving Father would tell us to stand--and then knowing that we can't, gives us His own indefatigable, unassailable strength.

In the strength of the Lord's might, bedecked with the armor He has given us, we can stand firm. As John Calvin noted, "If the Lord aids us by his mighty power, we have no reason to shrink from the combat." (Commentary on Ephesians)

How has memorizing these verses blessed you this month?

The belt of truth

2010-05-25T08:00:00.004-04:00

This month we've been looking spiritual warfare in Ephesians 6:10-20 as part of TFC's RMMR reading plan.

A couple of weekends ago, TFC's pastoral staff and wives went into New York City to see Max McLean perform Screwtape Letters. If you're not familiar with Screwtape Letters, it's a short novel written by C.S. Lewis that's sort of a sneak peak into the activities of demons via letters exchanged between one demon and his "mentor" demon.

I'd say it was good timing.

We'd been in Ephesians 6 for a couple of weeks, and here was an opportunity to take a kind of real-life dramatic look at what Paul is talking about.

The biggest thing I came away with was Paul's appropriate use of the word "schemes" in verse 11. What is clear in Screwtape Letters is that Satan is the father of lies, and his demons seek to twist and distort every thought beholden to man.

Feeling disappointed with your husband as of late? If only he would be more like those men in the soap operas or in your favorite romantic comedy, then you'd be happy.

Things been going well in your spiritual walk lately? Well, shouldn't they? Look at all the reading you've been doing, and all the times you've been to care group, and how well you pay attention on Sunday mornings.

Struggling with anger because your children haven't been on their best behavior? Of course you should be angry! You're the parent and they show you no respect, and, well, they're just gonna get it. That'll show them.

He'll use anything, even the good stuff.

So what do we do about it? Well the first weapon mentioned in Ephesians 6:14 is the belt of truth, and there's no better defense for lies than the truth. 1 Peter 1:13 says, "Therefore, preparing your minds for action, and being sober-minded, set your hope fully on the grace that will be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ." Focusing on the truth prepares your mind to fight against the lies of the devil, whether they come from the world outside or from your inward thoughts. And, if you remember from Gayline's post on sober-mindedness,

Sober-mindedness is processing all of life through the truth of God's word. It is being able to process a response, or an answer, or an attitude, a crisis or a counseling situation with a mind ready for action. It is a mind that is poised to speak and act wisely.

Luke 12:35 and Hebrews 5:14 remind us that we must persevere in our focus on God's truth. We must "stay dressed for action" and train our powers of discernment "by constant practice to distinguish good from evil."

When we check our outward clothing in the mirror every morning, may we remember to check for our spiritual clothing, especially the belt of truth.

Looking unto Jesus

2010-05-23T17:08:00.004-04:00

It has been a few weeks since I've posted. I've needed a break for the purpose of looking unto Jesus. I'll share more of that with you, but first I'll state that you may not at first glance see the connection of this post (and possibly a few more) to the Titus 2 passage.

I left off in Titus 2:2 where Paul tells Titus that older men and women are to be "sound in faith, in love and in steadfastness." In other words (my words) our theology and our teaching is given credence by how our faith and love are lived out when the rubber meets the road. Can those younger in years and younger in faith see that our faith passes the tests of time? Can they see us love the unlovely with Gospel love? Can they see an unshakeable devotion to God and His Truth that doesn't crumble in the storms of life?

This is what we are called upon to do and be. It isn't easy. In fact, it is impossible - in ourselves. But, God is the one who gives the gift of faith, love and steadfastness. It is God who gives us such a deep appreciation for what Christ did for us on the cross, we actually can be sound (unmoveable) in faith, love and steadfastness - even in our trials. But we must keep our eyes fixed on Christ at all times. He must be our focal point.

I'm going to try to illustrate.

For over a month I've been severely tested with a particular trial. A week ago it occurred to me how much like labor this test has felt like. I've given birth to six children, so I have a keen appreciation what laboring feels like. Though I am sure my labor experiences were not as painful or complicated as many women experience, I did experience pain!!! But here is how Tim and I labored together for the birth of our children:

Tim is 6'4" tall. I am 4' 11 3/4" short. When Tim sits in a chair and I stand in front of him we can see eye to eye. As I was laboring for the birth of our baby, I freely walked about the room but when a contraction came I would lean on Tim's shoulders, letting the weight of my womb drop in front of me, off my back and hips. Tim and I would then lock eyes and breathe our way through the pain. Tim's eyes were my focal point to get me one contraction closer to seeing our baby.

Funny thing is, we didn't plan it that way. It wasn't something we learned in childbirth classes. It just was natural for me to lean on him and to look into his eyes for my help and strength for he had proven himself to be strong, trustworthy and full of compassion.

I'll share more next week. But I'll leave you with this scripture passage. Please read it over carefully and let the richness of the truth bless your soul. And if you find yourself laboring through a trial, I pray that you, along with me, will look unto Jesus for He has in all ways proven Himself to be a strong, trustworthy, and compassionate Savior:

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. In your struggle against sin you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood (Hebrews 12:1-4).

Uprooting Anger (3)

2010-05-21T07:00:00.001-04:00

One of my favorite passages from this book so far:

The Bible portrays us as active moral agents--made in God's image--responsible for our own behavior. We must not blame our family members, our friends, our genes, our parents, our church leaders, society, our hormones, or the devil for our anger.

Instead, as we humble ourselves before God and confess that our anger is our own, arising from idolatrous lies and lusts, we find God's forgiving, enabling grace. We must meet God, draw near to God, have dealings with God, submit to God, and bring our anger to God. We must shift our functioning faith from worthless heart-idols to God's Son. (p. 71)

What has stood out to you?

When Christ Withdraws Himself

2010-05-20T00:08:00.006-04:00

This week Brooke blogged about the grace of God being administered to us in and through our sufferings and trials. Jenn blogged on the grace of God that enables us to look to the future with hope and expectation.

Everyone who is born of the Spirit of God experiences grace--every moment of every day for the rest of their lives (and on into eternity!).

What about when God seems farther away than the farthest star in the sky? How about when the Scriptures seem boring and the last thing on the planet you want to do is to discipline yourself in prayer--where's the grace?

A child of God feels no greater unrest or fear than when they wake up to find Christ so far away they doubt whether they ever really knew Him at all! Intimate fellowship with Christ seems such a thing of the past, the Christian questions whether he truly had such a relationship with Christ or if he just imagined it all to fill some void in his life. I've been there.

Why would the Chief Shepherd distance Himself from His precious flock if He shows only love and grace toward it?

John Owen offers insight:

Whilst we are in this life, the Lord Christ is pleased, in his sovereign wisdom, sometimes to withdraw, and, as it were, to hide himself from us. Then do our minds fall into clouds and darkness; faith is at a loss; we cannot behold his glory; yea, we may seek him, but cannot find him.

...Why does the Lord Christ, at any time, thus hide himself in his glory from the faith of believers, that they cannot behold him?

...He does it to stir us up in an eminent manner to a diligent search and inquiry after him. Woeful sloth and negligence are apt to prevail in us in our meditation on heavenly things. Though our hearts wake in a valuation of Christ, his love, and his grace, yet we sleep as to the due exercise of faith and love towards him.

...Now, he knows that those with whom he has been graciously present, who have had views of his glory, although they have not valued the mercy and privilege of it as they ought, yet can they not bear a sense of his absence and his hiding himself from them. By this, therefore, will he awake them to a diligent inquiry after him.

...Christ commits himself to us, and we ought carefully to keep his presence...But whilst we are busy here and there, while our minds are overfilled with other things, he withdraws himself, we cannot find him. But even this rebuke is a sanctified ordinance for our recovery, and his return to us. *

Christ's temporary withdrawal from a believer is a means of grace, in that it draws us closer to Him by awakening our desire and love for Him. Let us draw comfort and encouragement from this. Should you find that Christ is far away, respond in the manner His distance is intended to produce: run to Him and find solace in His presence. You will find Him rejoicing over you.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation. Psalm 51:12a

Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. James 4:8

*John Owen, The Glory of Christ, Christian Focus Publications (2004), pp. 194-196.

Longing for Eternity?

2010-05-19T09:24:00.001-04:00

If experiences in life were wells of water, then it would be safe to say that every well has a source of pollution in it. I used to think that if I just didn’t work at Wawa, everything in my life would be in order. Well, I don’t work at Wawa anymore—and I’m exceedingly thankful for that—but—don’t be too surprised—I’ve still got problems. I’ve got an entirely new set of circumstances at which I look and say something like, “If only ______, then I would be content.”

I’ve heard a rumor that other people have this problem, too. That sometimes mothers would just wish for a night of uninterrupted sleep. Or for a clean house, or a more attentive husband. We wish for a dog and then we wish we didn’t have a dog. We wish for children. We wish for relationships. We wish for success, health, and a lifelong vacation from the pain and toil of work.

It kinda sounds like we’re longing for eternity. Discontent, in one way, serves a purpose in keeping our hearts and minds focused on eternal things. Every day when we experience the futility of life, we are reminded that life is a vapor and this world is passing away. We’re not supposed to be perfectly happy in this fallen world! It is by the discontent that we feel almost constantly that we see, as the Preacher put it, that God has put eternity in the hearts of man.

On the other hand, discontent can become a stumbling block to our joy, blocking our view of the gracious gifts that God has given us. And honestly, if God were to take away everything that we have, as He did with Job, still we could say with perfect truthfulness,

“Whom have I in heaven but you?
And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”
Ps. 73:25-26

Grace

2010-05-18T11:31:00.004-04:00

"Beloved, our God has blessed and continues to bless, not by fits and starts but by a constant grace."
(Beside Still Waters, Charles H. Spurgeon, p. 138)

When you're going through hard times (a rebellious child, an angry husband, sickness, fatigue, spiritual dryness, etc.), do you ever get the feeling that maybe God has withdrawn His grace from you for some reason?

I would like to suggest that the better thought is that God has not withdrawn His grace; rather He is pouring out His grace upon you.

It may not feel like grace, but remember this: "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose" (Romans 8:28), and "he gives more grace" (James 4:6).

I can't get enough of it. And I'm never without it.

If you are His, you are always under His grace.

Uprooting Anger (2)

2010-05-14T09:39:00.004-04:00

First off, let us apologize for a blank week on the blog. With Gayline out of town, Brooke overnight at the hospital with the little guy on Monday, and a lot of busyness on the part of the Lawrence sisters, we just couldn't get a post out.

As for the book, just another question for you today--and hopefully this time someone will respond :-)

Where are you in the book and what have you found helpful so far?

p.s. Would you take a moment to go back and answer last week's question? We really would love to hear from you.

Uprooting Anger (1)

2010-05-07T08:28:00.003-04:00

Just a quick question today since we're only getting started on the book this week.

What made you decide to join in on our 4th book, Uprooting Anger? We'd love to hear from you.

Didn't make it to the conference?

2010-05-05T07:30:00.002-04:00

I had the privilege of going to the Philadelphia Conference on Reformed Theology this weekend with almost a dozen folks from Trinity. We heard some great teaching by some incredibly gifted pastors and teachers.

The conference began with this thesis statement:
We are here to see Jesus, to learn that all things are set under His feet, and that one day His victory shall be visible--and one day every tongue shall confess He is Lord.

But the weather was a little hot, and my parking garage was a little far away from my hotel. One of two tiny elevators was broken. My room keys, on the other hand, worked just fine after the first two failures and replacements. Eight flights up stairs--up, down, up, down, up. My sister got sick, my friend was sick, and the entire city of Philadelphia didn't sleep, but chose to set off sirens outside my window all night.

But that doesn't change the facts: All things are about Jesus. All things--elevators, sickness, theology, me--are set under His feet.

Which answer is truer, DA Carson asked, did God cause my sister to get sick or did germs? Both are true. Which is more fundamental?

Phil Ryken said, "One of the most cursed things we suffer is the constant underlying discontent. While things seem to get better, people feel worse. The fundamental problem is a fallen world cannot satisfy."

A great theology conference in a fallen world cannot satisfy. A cool drink on a hot day cannot satisfy. A peaceful rest, a strengthening meal, a friendly conversation--all cannot satisfy intimately and infinitely. Only God can.

The moral of the story is not to guard your heart, DA Carson concluded. The point is to choose your treasure, because where your treasure is, there will your heart be also. Don't plan for the next thirty years--plan for the next fifty billion years. But all of that with a spirit of hope, not of curmudgeonly slavery to duty: "We cannot be properly mature if we are not hope-oriented."

Some things to hope for: God hears and answers prayer. Jesus will return in great glory. There is a resurrection from the dead, far greater than we can imagine. We will not be capable of sin in glory. God is at work in us every day. Those who trust in Him will not be put to shame.

Spirit given self-control

2010-05-03T13:32:00.000-04:00

Here are two children's songs. Their message is for us all. If you do not know the tunes, I'd suggest you download them from Sovereign Grace Music.

These are songs we all need to have tattooed on our minds and hearts. Notice how in the first song we confess we cannot have self-control unless the Holy Spirit gives it. How does the Holy Spirit give it? In response to our crying out to God for it.

The second song reminds us of the Gospel, our only hope (for self-control or any good thing). He, who was tempted in every way like us, never sinned. Because He didn't sin, He became a perfect sacrifice acceptable to God. Because He was acceptable to God, He now sits at the Father's right hand making intercession for us. Sitting at the Father's right hand means He has become our Great High Priest and as such He receives our prayers. When we pray for self-control, Jesus takes our prayer to the Father and the Father quickly responds with the Holy Spirit filling us with power to exercise self-control. And when we fail and go to God in genuine repentance, Jesus, through the merits of His Blood, pleads to the Father for our forgiveness. Once again, I say, "Amazing Grace."

Give Me Self-Control

Your Word tells me I have a need
To watch out for my soul
And every day it's clear to me
I need Your self-control
My hands and feet are quick to move
Before I even know
So Jesus make me more like You
And give me self-control

Lord, I'm needy
So I'm pleading
Come and fill me
Help me to be self-controlled
Help me to be self-controlled

When I say words I shouldn't speak
And hurt the ones I know
On mornings when I'd rather sleep
I need Your self-control
When I am told to sit for hours
And time goes by so slow
I need the Holy Spirit's power
To give me self-control

Lord, I'm needy
So I'm pleading
Come and fill me
Help me to be self-controlled
Help me to be self-controlled

Jesus, You're My Hope

Jesus, You were tempted
In every way like I am
But You never gave in - no!
You looked to Your Father
And the Spirit's power
For Your strength and self-control

Jesus, You're my hope
You will help me grow
I don't want to sin
I don't want to give in- no!
Jesus, give me self-control

Right at the beginning
When I feel like sinning
Help me look to You alone
Help me to obey, Lord
Follow in Your way, Lord
Jesus, give me self-control

New Book Tomorrow

2010-05-02T13:34:00.002-04:00

Just a reminder that we start a new book tomorrow: Uprooting Anger by Robert D. Jones.

If you're married, you need this book.
If you're single, you need this book.
If you have kids, you need this book.
If you have parents, you need this book.
If you have a job, you need this book.
If you interact with other people at all, you need this book.

We hope that you'll join us.

What Are You Reading? (4)

2010-04-29T22:07:00.004-04:00

Well, we're wrapping up our book of the month: What's The Difference? by John Piper.

How did it impact you?

It gave me a clearer picture of what it means to be biblically feminine and what submission is and is not.

If this book has left you with more questions and a desire to go into greater depth on the subject, check out Recovering Manhood and Womanhood (Crossway, 1990). This larger volume provides in-depth exegesis of relevant Scriptural passages and also more practical guidance on how to live as a biblical female.

I'll end with this statement that really encouraged me--it's the last paragraph of the book, taken from the Danvers Statement (charter statement of the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood).

With half the world's population outside the reach of indigenous evangelism; with countless other lost people in those societies that have heard the gospel; with the stresses and miseries of sickness, malnutrition, homelessness, illiteracy, ignorance, aging, addiction, crime, incarceration, neuroses, and loneliness, no man or woman who feels a passion from God to make His grace known in word and deed need ever live without a fulfilling ministry for the glory of Christ and the good of this fallen world.

We might struggle, as women, with the way God has made us and the role He has given us, but that is the fault of our fallen sinful flesh, not His perfect design. God help us all to grow in grace and to become the 'Titus 2 Woman' Gayline has been blogging about.

Next book on the list: Uprooting Anger by Robert D. Jones. Reading starts this Monday and we'd love for you to join us!

Subject-verb-object

2010-04-29T07:30:00.000-04:00

it is the same God who empowers them
To each is given
who apportions to each one individually as he wills
God arranged the members
each one of them, as he chose
But God has so composed the body
And God has appointed in the church

Have you noticed the subjects, verbs, and objects in this entire passage? God is the Subject, the Doer, the Actor performing the verbs. We are the objects, the ones benefiting by the Actor's actions.

We receive spiritual gifts because God gave them to us. We don't have them naturally, and we don't go out and shop for them, and we don't develop them through striving. The Creator-God knows perfectly what he is about, and he is so ordering the church and composing the body that he gives spiritual gifts precisely as he deems best.

Where does that leave us with our myriad of reactions to spiritual gifts?

Insignificant Spiritual Gift? Go Stub Your Toe!

2010-04-28T00:07:00.003-04:00

21The eye cannot say to the hand, "I have no need of you," nor again the head to the feet, "I have no need of you." 22On the contrary, the parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, 23and on those parts of the body that we think less honorable we bestow the greater honor, and our unpresentable parts are treated with greater modesty, 24which our more presentable parts do not require. But God has so composed the body, giving greater honor to the part that lacked it, 25that there may be no division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. 26If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together. 1 Corinthians 12:21-26

Earlier today I was talking with a sales vendor at work about his broken pinky toe. He looked pretty pathetic limping all over the store. I likened his toe to 'that thing that you never think about until you hurt it.'

Maybe you see yourself as possessing the 'pinky toe' of spiritual gifts. Maybe no one really notices you or thanks you for serving the church or even knows exactly what spiritual gift you possess.

Do not belittle your God-given gifts or envy others' gifts. The Spirit gave you the perfect gifts to serve your church body in the exact way they need to be served. That is amazing!

The body works best when all of its' organs and limbs and parts are working correctly and cohesively. A broken pinky toe causes pain, loss of balance, and over-compensation. Surely the body suffers when the toe is not functioning the way it should; just as it thrives when the toe serves the body in its' intended ways.

Embrace and cultivate your spiritual gifts for the glory of God and for the good of His church. No matter how insignificant you think your gifting is, it is not insignificant to the body/church. There is room neither for pride nor for discontentment in your spiritual gift--each receives what the Spirit of God wisely bestows. We can trust Him.

Gifts vs. Envy

2010-04-27T14:22:00.007-04:00

It's interesting to me the whole time we've been reading through 1 Corinthians 12, Girl Talk has been doing a series on envy. (I would have put up a direct link but at the time of posting, none of their blog pages were loading. The series started March 15 and has been going on almost every day since then.)

What is is about women in particular that causes us to be compare-mongers? We're (almost) always putting ourselves up against the haves and have nots of other women. She has better clothes. I have better kids. She has a better husband. I have a bigger house.

Are you like that with your gifts? Do you think of yourself as better off or more spiritual or more blessed because you have a particular set of "important" giftings while most other women around you have "far less important" gifts? Or is it the opposite? In other words, do you feel that you are worth less or can have less of an impact for God because you don't have as "great" a set of giftings as other women around you do?

Both of these positions are a terrible trap. Paul reminds us in 1 Corinthians 12:4-6 that all the gifts--ALL the gifts (even the ones we view as insignificant)--are provided and empowered by the same Spirit, Lord, and God.

How can we get out of the trap? I think one of the best things to do is to reflect on our memory verse for this month, 1 Corinthians 12:7.

First of all, our gifts are not our own: "To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit..." They aren't something that we've earned, or something that's been given to us because we deserved them. They are God's, and they are His to give out as He sees fit. Do you think too highly of your gifts? Remember that they have been given to you. Do you think too low of your gifts? Remember that the God of the universe gave them to you. Does He do anything insignificant?

Second of all, the gifts are not for us: "...for the common good." We are to use them to build others up. God is in the business of bringing us together so that we can encourage each other. Do you think too highly of your gifts? Do you puff up and put yourself above others as the Corinthians were doing, losing sight of their ultimate purpose? Remember that they are for the common good. It's not about you. Do you think too low of your gifts? Are you reluctant to exercise them because they don't mean much, or because you don't think they're important? Remember that they are for the common good. God gives good gifts to His children. If you are one of them, what He has given you is good, and you should put it to good use.

My thoughts for the month's meditation. We'd love to hear yours.

Dignified

2010-04-24T21:12:00.010-04:00

Continuing in our series on Titus 2, we learn about another characteristic of godly older women. We read if you want to be an older woman who wants to speak into the lives of younger women, you first need to be dignified.

How does that settle with you? Does it make you shudder? Does it conjure up images of ladies wearing their hair in tight buns, with long noses and serious faces?

During my senior year of high school our class voted on class superlatives. Best looking, funniest, smartest, etc. Guess what I was chosen for? Yup. Most dignified. I'm not sure why. Was I really the best they could choose for this? Couldn't they have chosen me for something else, like "most likely to succeed"? I'm convinced they didn't fully understand the meaning of the term. My picture in the yearbook is back to back with the "most dignified" boy with our noses up in the air, acting all hoity-toity. Did my classmates think I was stuck up? I don't think so. At least I hope not!! I'm guessing that was just a pose they thought best captured the concept.

I was not dignified in much of my behavior back then. I am still embarrassed to think of the things I did, or thought were funny. I was a pretty typical teen and sadly some of my immaturity followed me into my early years of marriage. I can easily relate to the Apostle Paul when he said, "When I was a child I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child." (I Corinthians 13:11)

To be sober-minded has to do with our thought life. To be dignified has to do with our character. It has to do with carrying ourselves with a seriousness and deliberation that is consistent with our age and our calling.

Just as the President must conduct himself in a dignified manner that befits the office, so must older men and women in Christ. They have a reputation to uphold. Dignified men and women who are Christians know that life and faith is a serious business and their behavior and conversations should convey that.

That's not to say they do not have joy!! Part of the serious business of faith is to be seriously joy-filled!! There is no place for long faces in dignified women.

So, here's the question for the OWC (the Older Women Club) this week:

Are there ways in which you need to grow up a bit? Are you dignified in your speech, your humor, your mannerisms, your dress? If you want young women to listen to your message, these are things you must consider.

But remember, a dignified woman enjoys life, her God and her calling. A dignified woman even does cartwheels every now and then!

What's the Difference? (3)

2010-04-23T07:00:00.001-04:00

Chapter four of What's the Difference is not a list of do's and don'ts, but rather is a guide toward living wisely and godly as a woman. Dr. Piper gives us a great definition of what mature femininity means and walks us through that definition step-by-step.

One of the most significant conclusions that he reaches is his statement on how praying women exert influence.

Praying women exert far more power in this world than all political leaders put together. This kind of powerful influence is compounded immensely when one considers the degree to which the world is shaped and guided by the effects of how men and women are formed by their mothers. This influence is perhaps more effective than all the leadership of men put together. (p. 61)

Biblical femininity is not an excuse to sit back and let someone else do all the work. Instead, we get the exciting and high privilege of praying to the Lord of all the earth. We don't need take up arms either in the home or in the literal battle. The Lord directs the paths of all people, and He listens to our prayers.

Watch this video. Go to the seminar.

2010-04-20T07:51:00.000-04:00

What's the Difference? (2)

2010-04-16T08:00:00.001-04:00

So we come to chapter 2 in our current book What's the Difference?, and it's about masculinity. What can we draw from a chapter on masculinity for a women's blog?

We take away a few tips on how to let men be men as designed by God.

First up: "At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead..."

When a Christian man benevolently (i.e. for the good of the woman) takes up the responsibility to lead, regardless of our perception of the quality of his leading (i.e. saying "well I wouldn't do it that way"), we have the feminine responsibility to follow.

- When was the last time you asked your husband "how am I doing in my following?"
- Do you allow him to initiate prayer at meal times, gather the family for devotions, set down the moral standards for your children, decide on financial priorities, etc.?
- How do you respond if your husband has appropriately sought your input for an upcoming decision and has chosen a path different from the one you would have chosen?
- Do you maintain a femininity that allows your husband to "[remain] alert to [your] deeper personal needs [as a] woman and [mingle] strength and tenderness to make [your] joy complete"?
- Do you allow and encourage (not command) your husband to take care of discipline issues when he is home?
- Do you together seek "to cultivate and communicate a healthy pattern of complementarity" in who drives the car, who opens the door, who walks on the street side, etc.?

Second: "At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to... provide for..."

Hear this: Piper is sure and careful to clarify that he does not mean women should not work outside the home. There are times when that is necessary. What he is saying is that "...when there is no bread on the table it is the man who should feel the main pressure to do something to get it there." So my question here would be:

Are you letting your desire to work outside the home supersede your husband's natural inclination and responsibility to provide for your family?

Third: "At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to... protect..."

In the world today we often see women scorning the protection of men because they feel it brands them as weak and incapable. However, as Piper points out, "It belongs to masculinity to accept danger to protect women." And not because in dangerous situations man's first thought is that the woman at his side is weak; rather, because he is the man and she is the woman. This does not mean the woman is not able to join in the fight, or that she will not be the one to deliver the decisive blow. But it does mean that the man accepts the primary responsibility to protect the woman when confronted with danger.

Do you allow your husband to protect you and fight for you when you are threatened?

In closing, it needs to be said that we do understand that there are some women reading this blog whose husbands are not Christians, or who are single moms. How can you encourage a proper view of mature masculinity in such situations? Let me remind you of one passage from the book:

[A man's] sense of responsibility will find expression in the ways he... gives moral and spiritual leadership for his family, and takes the initiative to provide them with the bread of life, and protect them from the greatest enemies of all, Satan and sin.

...So is a woman masculine if she is a single parent and provides these things for her children? Are these only for men to do?... A woman is not unduly masculine in performing these things for her children if she has the sense that this would be properly done by her husband if she had one, and if she performs them with a uniquely feminine demeanor.

....If the husband is there but neglects his responsibility and does not provide leadership for the children, then the mature, feminine mother will make every effort to do so, yet in a way that says to the husband, "I do not defy you, I love you and long with all my heart that you were with me in this spiritual and moral commitment, leading me and the family to God."

May the knowledge of true masculinity gained from this book help us all as we allow and encourage the men in our life to be men.

neither hot nor cold

2010-04-14T07:30:00.001-04:00

"I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth." [1]

So begins Jesus' words to the famously lukewarm church of Laodicia. But Don Carson points out that these verses are terribly misapplied [2]. No first-century Laodician would interpret it as simply an objection to the temperature of water. The real problem was that Laodicia had no fresh water. Neighboring valleys had clear hot springs for bathing and cold springs of good water for drinking. But Laodicia had no clean, usable water.

We're not reading about indifference, but impurity.

"For you say, I am rich, I have prospered, and I need nothing, not realizing that you are wretched, pitiable, poor, blind, and naked. I counsel you to buy from me gold refined by fire, so that you may be rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself and the shame of your nakedness may not be seen, and salve to anoint your eyes, so that you may see."

Jesus saw them as wretched, blind, naked, covered in shame. They didn't realize there was a problem. We don't realize there's a problem.

"Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent."

We heard on Sunday that God speaks to us through our pastors. Let us take the reproof they offer and repent with great zeal. The imPURE seminar is on Saturday, April 24 from 9-3. This is too important to skip.

[1] Rev. 3:15-19
[2] Don Carson, "Revelation part 5"

imPURE

2010-04-13T14:07:00.005-04:00

Purity isn't just a male issue. It's a human issue. We all struggle with impurity at one level or another, whether we're young, old, married, single, male, or female.

As you may know, TFC is holding a purity seminar on Saturday, April 24, from 9-3. We wanted to take the next couple of weeks to speak to purity, and to encourage you to attend the seminar. Topics include:

1. bePURE: Inward grace, outward honor - where our hearts should lead if our lives are to follow (Tim Shorey)

2. nowPURE: Old sin, new grace - how to turn things around (Steve Cassarino)

3. imPURE: In the world but not of the world - making sex small and God big in our media habits (Tim Bowditch)

4. Breakout sessions
a) PURE (married couples): Sex is a good - questions and answers about sex, marriage, and the world (pastoral staff)
b) stayPURE (singles): Don't waste your singleness - encouragement and practical advise for singles (adults w/ TW Shorey; teens Q & A w/ Brian Solik)

5. i'mPURE: Sex, Hope, and the Gospel - Grace that is greater than all our sins

Our RMMR reading plan brought us to Romans 8 today. Consider this from the ESV Study Bible footnotes regarding Romans 8:13:

God and believers each have a role in sanctification: it must be by the Spirit and His power, but you put to death shows that one must take an active role in battling sinful habits.

As you can see from the topics list, we're planning to cover both of these aspects.

Trust me, you don't want to miss this.

Join us.

Under the Influence

2010-04-11T06:51:00.007-04:00

There is so much that weighs heavily on a woman's mind. Not only is she occupied with the needs of her family but she is processing all of life at the speed of light. These days we are bombarded with news, texts, emails, twitters, and blogs. The information that comes to us in any given day far exceeds what a woman would have had to process in New Testament days. The distractions that come with managing a household are similar to those experienced by our NT sisters, but add to that the precious minutes of life that are lost being left on hold while contacting customer service for a malfunctioning appliance, or tech-support to handle a computer glitch, or managing files for insurance, banking, DMV, etc and your head spins out of control.

Today's older Christian woman faces these challenges all the while being called to teach and train younger women. And so, like the NT older women are called to sober-mindedness, we are as well!!

The women in Titus 2 needed to be taught how their thought life was critical for their Christian witness and ministry. One might think it is not difficult for an older woman to be sober minded, but I'm here to tell you it is. For, after all the physical duties of a day are completed, the older woman facing the challenges of aging, is tempted to indulge in mindless activity. Believe me. I know. There comes a point in a day when a woman says, "enough!". And the temptation is strong to indulge the mind in habitual mindless television viewing, oversleeping, popping a few pills or drinking too much alcohol. Quite possibly an older woman may even find a mental and emotional escape in overeating. There comes a point in every day when an older woman is tempted to rationalize selfish behavior for the momentary mental relief from responsibilities.

Sober-mindedness has to do with temperance: showing moderation or restraint. To be sober-minded is to not be under the influence of anything that would not allow for clear minded thoughts about life, faith and service to God and others.

Sober-mindedness isn't something we tack on to the end of our day. It isn't something we fit into the schedule. Sober-mindedness is processing all of life through the truth of God's word. It is being able to process a response, or an answer, or an attitude, a crisis or a counseling situation with a mind ready for action. It is a mind that is poised to speak and act wisely. It is not mindlessness. It is not a mind dulled by substances or slothfulness.

All Christians are called to be sober-minded (I Peter 1:13; 4:7; 5:8). But pastors, deacons, older men and older women are specifically called to sober-mindedness. This is because they (we) bear a greater responsibility to teach and to set an example for those that are learning from us.

So, this the challenge: What is there in my life that is keeping me from thinking soberly?

What patterns of behavior are dulling my mind?

Am I truly:
"[setting] my mind on the things of the Spirit" (Romans 8:5)
"[setting] my mind on things above" (Colossians 3:2)
"[preparing] my mind for action" (I Peter 1:13)
"mature in my thinking" (I Cor. 14:20)
"taking every thought captive to obey Christ" (2 Cor. 10:5)

If I am, then I am living "under the influence" of something very powerful and very good.

On the Lighter Side

2010-04-10T07:30:00.001-04:00

This desperately cute video is made bitter-sweet by the knowledge that almost three years ago, this family suffered the stillbirth of their baby girl. A great deal of sorrow preceded this joy.

Molly Piper

Beautiful Truth

2010-04-08T07:55:00.009-04:00

Many years ago Tim and I, along with 2 other couples, signed up for introductory ballroom dance classes in preparation for a formal event where it would have been nice to know some basic dance steps. It was an enlightening experience to say the least. Let's just say, Tim and I now have a greater appreciation for those couples who can glide effortlessly across a dance floor, moving in fluid motion as one. We also have a better understanding of the need for one of the dance partners to lead. Without the strong, confident guidance of the leader, the couple ends up with four left feet (not a pretty sight). When the leader does his part, and the partner follows it is a beautiful thing to behold.

In the first chapter of What's the Difference? Dr. John Piper gives us his reasons for writing it. He says:

Over the years I have come to see from Scripture and from life that manhood and womanhood are the beautiful handiwork of a good and loving God. He designed our differences and they are profound. They are not mere physiological prerequisites for sexual union. They go to the root of our personhood. This essay is an attempt to define some of those differences as God wills them to be according to the Bible.

And so, in this book Piper is attempting to convince his readers of the reasonableness of man and woman's differences and purposes. He begins by building his case, "according to the Bible." Evangelical Christians should want to know what the Bible teaches on manhood and womanhood. Piper helps us by presenting in this short book a clear and concise argument for this truth.

But Piper also recognizes there is another convincing way for the truth of Biblical manhood and womanhood to become attractive to us. He answers the question:

Is the vision beautiful and satisfying and fulfilling? Can I live with it? ....Not only must there be thorough exegesis [the study of words and context], there must also be a portrayal of the vision that satisfies the heart as well as the head. Or to put it another way: we must commend the beauty as well as the truth of the vision. We must show that something is not only right but also good. It is not only valid but also valuable, not only accurate but also admirable.

Are you reading along? If you are, how are you learning more of the beauty and truth of God's design for the "dance" of biblical manhood and womanhood?

Time for a Food Revolution?

2010-04-08T07:30:00.000-04:00

I try not to watch too much television, probably primarily because it puts me straight to sleep. But there is a show I've been watching lately. It's called Jamie Oliver's Food Revolution. The plot is this--Jamie Oliver, a English chef who "revolutionized" the food in the British public schools, has come to the most unhealthy town in America to try to change the way an entire town eats.

I love the idea. I confess to being an organic consuming, whole-grain chewing food snob. I plan on preserving my health by consuming as few preservatives as possible.

On the show, the local radio host shows his adamant disgust with the idea of "healthy eating" by protesting that he doesn't want to eat only salad. Jamie Oliver's protests that healthy food is a lot more than just salad fell on completely deaf ears.

Spiritually, we need to eat. But do you remember the cartoon that Josh Harris drew in Dug Down Deep? We feed ourselves every day. The question is, are we feeding our flesh or our spirit? Are we taking in wholesome foods or fast food?

Some signs that your food might not be the healthiest:
1. it takes little to no thought
2. convenience is the top priority
3. it's all one color or texture

Does that describe our private worship? Does that describe how we pray or meditate or study Scripture? Does that describe the doctrine we adhere to or the leaders we follow?

If so, what is stopping us from revolutionizing our food?

Comfort--Lies vs. Reality

2010-04-06T23:19:00.006-04:00

I was so convicted by Brooke's post yesterday. So often, I go to something other than God for comfort.

Idols lie and entice us with false promises and we, weak sinners that we are, are often guilty of tasting the bitter fruit of idols rather than feasting on the sweet, nourishing promises of God.

Like eating Hershey kisses instead of fine Belgian chocolate (to borrow Pastor Tim's analogy). Think of how foolish it would be, once having tasted Belgian chocolate, to keep going back to your bag of Hershey kisses thinking, 'Maybe this one will taste like the Belgian...maybe this one will taste like the Belgian...maybe this one.........'

And your Belgian chocolate is sitting there untouched because you are beguiled by the pretty silver wrappers and the advertising ploys of Hershey that promote their little chocolate's as 'The Best!' One taste and you will know that one lives up to its' claims and one...well, falls short.

The following is taken from the February twenty-ninth entry in Voices From the Past. (excerpt written by Richard Sibbes, edited by Richard Rushing)

All of God's ways are merciful and true though we might feel much forsaken at the present. The Holy Spirit teaches us to see that God is our best friend, and he will never forsake us...He is always present in power and providence by his Spirit in supporting, comforting, and strengthening the hearts of his children.
God alone can fill every corner of the soul of man. God is a fountain that will never run dry. If it is good to be near God, then the nearer we are to him, makes it even better...Labour to be near to him. God is near to all that call upon him.

Amen.

"But for me it is good to be near God." Psalm 73:28a

Comfort

2010-04-06T13:17:00.004-04:00

If you're friends with me on facebook or you follow me on twitter, you saw this excerpt in my status this morning:

It is as ordinary for the righteous to be comforted as it is for the day to dawn. Wait for the light; it will surely come.

It's from Beside Still Waters, a collection of writings from Charles Spurgeon, edited and put into updated language by Roy Clarke.

As I've been thinking on this during the day, I've been reminded of the first couple of sermons from the current preaching series at TFC, Behold Your God.

How does God comfort his people in Isaiah 40? He basically awes them with himself. He says, "Look at me! Look at who I am! This will comfort you!"

Have you been needing comfort lately? Maybe your husband has been out of work for months. Or your own job is in jeopardy. Maybe you have a child who has wandered from you, or you've recently lost a close family member. Maybe you're dealing with health issues or a strained relationship. Maybe you are lonely.

We women--especially those of us with families--have lots of places to look for comfort. Are you looking to your husband for comfort? Your kids? Are you looking to your friends or coworkers? Or maybe your boyfriend? Is it food? Or television, or movies, or games, or books, or going out?

There is only one who will bring you true and lasting comfort. It is God. And that is why it is "ordinary" for a righteous person to be comforted. A righteous person has one gaze: the gaze at God.

It is the gaze that brings comfort.

"Light dawns in the darkness for the upright; he is gracious, merciful, and righteous" (Psalm 112:4).

p.s. Don't forget we started reading What's the Difference? yesterday. Join us.

Likewise

2010-04-05T11:47:00.008-04:00

We will be spending some time thinking about the godly character of members of the OWC. It isn't enough to simply be a certain age. A member of the "older woman club" must have godly character that is consistent with her profession of faith. Before a woman opens her mouth with teaching, she must first humbly examine her life and character closely.

This isn't to say an older woman has to be perfect (we all know too well, that isn't possible this side of heaven). But her deepest desire and the direction of her life is to be as "godly as a redeemed sinner can possibly be."

In Titus 2, Paul doesn't give vague generalities. I find this interesting. Throughout the New Testament, Christ and the apostles are not hesitant to give us clear guidelines for how to live the christian life. We are not at liberty to pick and choose which of God's clear commands we will obey. We must, with dependence on the grace of God and the power of the Holy Spirit who lives within us live, do as Peter says: "as obedient children do not be conformed to the passions of your former ignorance, but as he who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, since it is written, 'You shall be holy, for I am holy'" (1 Peter 1:14,15).

Membership in the OWC carries with it certain responsibilities.

First we read women are to be like the older men. Verse 3 reads: "Older women likewise..." Like what? Verse 2 tells us: "Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love and in steadfastness."

So are we.

In the next six weeks we will dig into each of these, to find their meaning and hopefully learn together how we can be pursuing a mature and godly perspective and lifestyle.

And, if you are not yet an OWC member, may I suggest you read along so that you may be inspired to begin to pursue these qualities? One thing is certain. When you turn 50 you are not zapped with godliness. These are things that are learned and pursued, by God's grace, over a lifetime. And yet, if you are a new believer (or an older believer), despite years of living otherwise, God is ready to pour out His grace upon you to enable you to pursue these things beginning right now.

If we have been given the incredible gift of salvation through Christ alone, may we all ask ourselves this question, "How shall we now live for the Glory of God and the good of the church?"

And the winner is...

2010-04-03T20:20:00.003-04:00

Leah! Again! Congratulations on winning a copy of our next book: What's the Difference? Catch up with Robin on Sunday to claim your prize.

Hope to see more comments about the impact of Living the Cross Centered Life even though the contest is over.

Thanks everyone!

On the Lighter Side

2010-04-03T00:11:00.002-04:00

Two weeks away from TFC's Silent Auction!!!

Do you have your tickets yet?

I mean, where else can you get a dessert buffet, fun fellowship, and entertainment all for $10?!?! Ask a neighbor, coworker, or friend and come out for the fun!

The proceeds will benefit TFC's Roots to Fruit 20th Anniversary Celebration, as well as, 10 percent being donated to America's Keswick.

Here's a sneak peak of the centerpieces that will decorate the tables--see the 'roots to fruit' theme???

We need your help! We need twenty clear vases for the evening. If you are willing to lend your vase for the event, bring it to the church building and drop it off in the kitchen (just make sure it's labeled on the bottom or identified in some way so that we can label it!)

Hope to see you all at the auction!

Living the Cross Centered Life (3)

2010-04-02T06:20:00.005-04:00

It's hard to think of a better book to have been reading in the month leading up to Good Friday and Resurrection Sunday than Living the Cross Centered Life. We should always be meditating on this stuff, and yet, anniversaries, memorials, and celebrations are wonderful reminders for us to focus and pay attention because this is important. Because today is Good Friday, I am going to hopscotch my way through the book, highlighting a few passages that just deserve to be highlighted any day of the year, but on Good Friday especially.

A holy God can respond only in furious wrath to sin; how much more so when the sin is persistent, intrinsic evil! How could He ever forgive, pardon, save, and be reconciled with those who are entrenched and enslaved in such blatant hostility toward Him? (63)

Because of God's amazingly gracious heart toward those who thoroughly deserve only His wrath, He both planned for and provided this mediator to resolve the divine dilemma. In the mystery of His mercy, God--the innocent, offended party--offers up His own Son to death, to satisfy His righteous wrath and save the guilty party from it. (70)

With whom do you most identify in the events of this dark day? I identify most with the angry mob screaming, "Crucify Him!" Unless you see yourself standing there with the shrieking crowd, full of hostility and hatred for the holy and innocent Lamb of God, you don't really understand the nature and depth of your sin or the necessity of the cross.(86-87)

When we begin to grasp that we joined that mockery--that we are to blame for the Savior's death--we start to understand the seriousness of our sin.(88)

Easter cards are pretty and are nice to send to people. But the cross doesn't grow out of a cluster of spring flowers tied together with ribbon. Let's not skip the horror and bloodshed and guilt of Friday, or we'll totally miss the resurrection-bringing joy of Sunday.

Don't forget to enter our contest by leaving a comment on this post. So far we only have one comment...

Where Does Love Come From?

2010-04-01T06:13:00.003-04:00

Top Five Google Results for 'Love':

1) Wikipedia Definition--"Love is any of a number of emotions related to a sense of strong affection and attachment."

2) "The Love Calculator"--Calculates the chance on a successful relationship between two people
(Who knew it was so simple?!?!)

3) LOVE Nightclub NYC

4) Image Results for Love--a LOT of hearts and a fat cupid

5) The Beatles LOVE--Cirque du Soleil show at The Mirage, Las Vegas

Of course, if you were thinking of something different at the mention of the word 'love,' just keep looking. There were 1,339,999,995 more results. Apparently, love is a popular topic!

You know, some of the most loving people I know are non-Christians. I would never say that only Christians can love; non-believers can love deeply. The world, in a sense, is aware of the beauty of sacrificial, faithful, and true love.

Love is a human trait. It is a human trait because it is a God trait and humans are image-bearers of God. We love because God loves. Our love, albeit, is a fallen, imperfect love, while God's love is perfect: God is love!

If you read 1Corinthians 13:1-13 to an unsaved friend, they would probably agree wholeheartedly with the text. They might even think it profoundly beautiful. It describes exactly how we want everyone to behave toward us. But actually live this way??? "Come on...we're only human!" is the cry of the age. By their deeds, unbelievers deny their God-given conscience.

So here are five thoughts on 'love' and the reality of its' origin:

1) The Bible is beautiful and speaks to the heart of man.

2) A loving atheist and a hateful Christian are both living contrary to their respective worldviews.

3) Being a 'loving person' does not merit salvation. Christ loved perfectly and it is in His obedience alone that we stand before God.

4) Non-Christians love because they are image-bearers and because God restrains their hatefulness. Christians love because they are image-bearers and because Christ breaks the bond of sin and frees them to live in obedience to God.

5) Evolution provides no explanation for love. The Bible does.

Just a few random thoughts about the reality of love and the witness it bears to a beautiful Creator.

"In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins" (1 John 4:9-10).

Don't forget to enter our contest by leaving a comment on this post. If you'd like to order a copy of our next book, What's the Difference?, please make sure to email Bruce THIS MORNING so he can have it for you on Sunday.

Memory

2010-03-31T06:50:00.006-04:00

When I was little I loved playing the classic card game, Memory. I got great satisfaction out of remembering what cards were where when other kids couldn't. In school-age years, I could often remember where on the page a particular piece of information was, and thus correctly answer test questions. It's the way I'm wired.

1 Corinthians 4:5 says that love is not resentful. My Bible says that "resentful" could also be translated "does not count up wrongdoing." Love has a bad memory when it comes to things done against it. It's not that it doesn't choose to flip over the memory cards and see what's there. It throws the cards away. There is no place in love for a list of wrongs.

2 Corinthians 5:19 says that in Jesus Christ, love incarnate, "...God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation." It isn't that he doesn't count your trespasses against you because he doesn't know them. It's because he chooses not to remember them.

When we forgive someone for a particular offense, it means that we're never allowed to bring that offense up again. If we do, it means we've never truly forgiven. It means we've kept a record. It means we haven't loved.

Thanks be to God that in his perfect love, he has declared me righteous in his sight, never to remember my sins again. He has forgiven me and therefore my offenses are gone. They were laid on his Son, Jesus, in my place.

May this be what I remember next time I'm tempted to keep track of someone else's sin.

How is your memory?

Don't forget to enter our contest by leaving a comment on this post. If you'd like to order a copy of our next book, What's the Difference?, please make sure to email Bruce TODAY so he can have it for you on Sunday.

Calvary Love

2010-03-30T07:30:00.026-04:00

The Bible's "love chapter" often reminds me of one of the greatest little treasures of a book, Amy Carmichael's If. She helps me expand the sentences, clauses, and phrases of 1 Corinthians 13 into real situations that demand "Calvary love." Here are four "Ifs" that illustrate our memory verse (1 Cor. 13:7), taken from our meditation passage (1 Cor. 13:4-8a) in the RMMR schedule.

Love bears all things.

If monotony tries me, and I cannot
stand drudgery;
if stupid people fret me and little
ruffles set me on edge;
if I make much of the trifles of life,
then I know nothing of Calvary love.

Love believes all things.

If I do not give a friend "the benefit of
           the doubt,"
        but put the worst construction
           instead of the best on what is
           said or done,
then I know nothing of Calvary love.

Love endures all things.

If I feel injured when another lays to
           my charge things that I know
           not,
        forgetting that my Sinless Saviour
           trod this path to the end,
then I know nothing of Calvary love.

Love hopes all things.

If I do not look with eyes of hope on
           all in whom there is even a faint
           beginning,
        as our Lord did, when,
           just after His disciples had
           wrangled about which of them
           should be accounted the greatest,
        He softened His rebuke with those
           heart-melting words, "Ye are
           they which have continued with
           Me in My temptations,"
then I know nothing of Calvary love.

"That which I know not, teach Thou me, O Lord, my God."

Amy Carmichael, If (Christian Literature Crusade, Fort Washington: Pennsylvania, 1938), 27, 44, 47, 53, 78.

Don't forget to enter our contest by leaving a comment on this post. If you'd like to order a copy of our next book, What's the Difference?, please make sure to email Bruce by Wednesday so he can have it for you on Sunday.

The Best Kind of Progress

2010-03-28T16:07:00.004-04:00

I am unable to fulfill my responsibility to you with a new Titus 2 post. Instead, since we are in the middle of discussing the OWC, I have copied a post from Girltalk by Carolyn Mahaney on the subject of menopause. This is just one in a series having to do with women's hormonal cycles and the emotional and spiritual struggles that can come with that. I highly recommend this series for your consideration. Here is one of the posts to get you started:

There are few times I feel less spiritual than when I face physical and hormonal challenges such as PMS and (now) menopause. I feel tired and irritable, my sin sometimes spilling over onto those around me.

My strategy has often been to try and wait it out. Once this is over, I tell myself, then I’ll get back to making progress in the Christian life. I forget that I am smack in the middle of God’s plan for my life! God has ordained these hormonal days along with all the others! Menopause isn’t simply a trial to get through. It’s an opportunity for testing faith and spiritual growth.

Elizabeth Prentiss beautifully expresses this point:

“God never place us in any position in which we can not grow. We may fancy that He does. We may fear we are so impeded by fretting, petty cares that we are gaining nothing; but when we are not sending any branches upward, we may be sending roots downward. Perhaps in the time of our humiliation, when everything seems a failure, we are making the best kind of progress.”

The best kind of progress. Far from precipitating a spiritual decline, we often grow more in these difficult seasons than when life is easy, and we feel like we’re flourishing (remember, those feelings can’t be trusted!)

That’s why the apostle Paul sees weakness as an opportunity for boasting in the Lord:

“But [God] said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:9-10).

For the sake of Christ, we are to boast in our weaknesses, we are to be content in menopause or PMS or postpartum depression. For when we are weak, it is then that His power rests on us. What an opportunity!

Don't forget to enter our contest by leaving a comment on this post. If you'd like to order a copy of our next book, What's the Difference?, please make sure to email Bruce by Wednesday so he can have it for you on Sunday.

Contest #2

2010-03-27T09:30:00.000-04:00

We've decided to do it again.

We're going to be giving away a copy of the next book on our reading list, John Piper's What's the Difference?.

All you have to do is leave a comment about how our current book, C.J. Mahaney's Living the Cross Centered Life, has impacted you.

We'll announce the winner next Saturday, so you have a whole week to leave your comment. We'd love to hear from you.

*Please note the contest is NOT limited to TFC members/attenders--it's open to all of our readers!

Living the Cross Centered Life (2)--One Day At A Time

2010-03-26T12:03:00.004-04:00

Reading Living the Cross Centered Life by C.J. Mahaney has been a refreshing 'splash' of grace on my soul. Chapters 10 and 11 were an extraordinary blessing to me and met me where I needed grace. Which chapters ministered to you???

It really struck me when C.J. says, "A cross centered life is made up of cross centered days" (p. 132).

Just like the growth of a child is imperceptible on a given day, but at the end of a year (or a month, like my 6'8" brother...) the growth is evident. So our spiritual progress cannot be measured every single day, but after periods of faithfully practicing the spiritual disciplines.

Mahaney has a short list of ways to help us stay cross-centered day after day: (pp. 133-145)

1) Memorize the Gospel
2) Pray the Gospel
3) Sing the Gospel
4) Review how the Gospel has changed you
5) Study the Gospel

I'm not espousing a do (a), get (b) methodology; rather, recognizing helpful advice--advice that has changed my spiritual walk for the better.

I have a box of 3x5 cards--verse on one side, reference on the other--to help me make memorizing Scripture a routine discipline. My lunch break at work is a perfect time to refresh myself in a good book (current read: The Glory of Christ by John Owen.....cannot recommend enough!). The more I meditate on the person and work of Jesus Christ, the more my prayers become cross-centered--my tongue releases the truths that are developed in my mind.

Any suggestions for how to incorporate more of 3) and 4) into my daily routine???

I would LOVE to hear what practices and disciplines have helped you in your spiritual walk.

Training for Godliness

2010-03-25T11:30:00.000-04:00

Right around Easter-time last year, I wrote an entry called Running Well about the need for discipline in the life of a runner, both literally and spiritually. And now I'm back with a year's worth of further perspective.

I haven't run much since last April. There's this thing called Life, and it got in the way. A lot of good things of much higher priority came into my schedule; running went out. Probably not the best idea I've ever had, but that's life. But now I'm working exercise back into my routine, and I'm seeing spiritual lessons that I need to learn.

Like last year, I have two big thoughts.
1. We don't exercise once a month and think that it will suffice. We go to work to train muscles for endurance. A once-a-month workout won't make a lick of difference to anyone. Sometimes we think that we had a great experience in church, or we had a great quiet time and really engaged the Lord in prayer. It doesn't really matter if I have a full time tomorrow or pray every day. No, it does matter! The less we exercise, the harder it is and the less effective it is.We need to daily lace on our sneakers and go at it, or we'll be fooling ourselves.

2. The only way to build endurance is by keeping at it day after day after day, each day working harder than the day before. The point of exercise is not so that the workout will one day be easy, but so that you can tackle harder and harder workouts. We don't skim the Word and float through prayer in the hopes that someday we'll have so much wisdom and understanding that Christianity will all be really easy. We study and dig down deep so that more and more our minds and hearts will belong to Christ and will long for His appearing; and so that as we do grow in wisdom, we will be of more use in the establishing of His eternal kingdom.

If you put these things before the brothers, you will be a good servant of Christ Jesus, being trained in the words of the faith and of the good doctrine that you have followed. Have nothing to do with irreverent, silly myths. Rather train yourself for godliness; for while bodily training is of some value, godliness is of value in every way, as it holds promise for the present life and also for the life to come. The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance. For to this end we toil and strive,because we have our hope set on the living God, who is the Savior of all people, especially of those who believe. (1 Tim. 4:6-10)

We're all in this together

2010-03-24T14:32:00.003-04:00

Lately God has been teaching me that I can't do this alone.

I realized not long ago that I've kind of been drifting through life, always with some vague awareness of the sovereign reign of God and the support of others in the body, but rarely pursuing those things with vigor. It's not been the best course of action (or inaction?). God has been showing me a better way.

The first person I definitely can't do this without is God. Just within these past few weeks I've been changing around my schedule to make sure that most mornings I'm up before our son, cracking open my Bible and getting into the day's RMMR reading. It's not that I wasn't doing it before, it's just that it definitely wasn't as consistent, and rarely was it in the morning before things got going. Along with that I've been trying to do my 15 minutes of WBD blog reading then too. Does reading in the morning guarantee that I'll have a good day? Of course not. But it does mean that I'll have at least started out my thoughts with God, and I do know that He is faithful to redirect my focus back to His grace throughout the day.

The second "person" I can't do this without is others. One person is my husband. He married me because he loves me and because he wants to do life with me. So I need to let him into my life, and I'm beginning to understand that I haven't done that very well as of late. Next to God, he knows me best, and is therefore in the best position to help me.

Another "person" is friends. I've become increasingly aware of the need for at least one truly deep friendship within my peers. The kind of friendship where we actually talk to each other about what's going on in our lives, what we're struggling with, where we're seeing grace, and then actually remember that person in prayer, and follow up with where we're encouraged and where we're seeing growth.

A third person is a mentor, affectionately dubbed by Gayline as a member of the OWC. During a conversation in which I said, "I need someone to show me where I need to grow," a friend said, "you need a mentor." Within a week I had asked what I felt was a rather awkward question to one of the older women in the church--"would you mentor me?"--and was greeted with an enthusiastic response. I've never experienced this kind of relationship before, and though it's a bit on the scary side, it's something I'm definitely looking forward to.

I can't say that I've arrived. I can say that I'm learning and I think I'm growing. By the grace of God alone, may this new awareness bring lasting change and further my sanctification.

Rain Shouts of the Glory of God

2010-03-23T08:35:00.008-04:00

I love rain. I love the smell, the sound, the look of rain. One of my favorite things about Spring is the thunderstorms that come with it!

Every time it rains, I think of Job 37-38--God blows me away with His sovereign reign over His creation. He did not just 'wind the clock' and let things go; no, He is actively sustaining the universe. Every storm, every drought, every individual raindrop is made by God and used for His wise purpose.

The snowflakes that fall on solitary mountain peaks and the spectacular thunderstorms that light up the dark recesses of the jungle with clashes of lightning and the brilliantly-colored sea creatures that thrive in the ocean's expansive depths--none of it is meaningless; all of it is glorious!

Perhaps some of you have read John Piper's article "The Great Work of God: Rain." I love it because it helps me see, in some small way, just what an amazing Creator our God is.

Is rain a great and unsearchable wonder wrought by God? Picture yourself as a farmer in the Near East, far from any lake or stream. A few wells keep the family and animals supplied with water. But if the crops are to grow and the family is to be fed from month to month, water has to come on the fields from another source. From where?

Well, the sky. The sky? Water will come out of the clear blue sky? Well, not exactly. Water will have to be carried in the sky from the Mediterranean Sea, over several hundred miles and then be poured out from the sky onto the fields. Carried? How much does it weigh? Well, if one inch of rain falls on one square mile of farmland during the night, that would be 27,878,400 cubic feet of water, which is 206,300,160 gallons, which is 1,650,501,280 pounds of water.

That's heavy. So how does it get up in the sky and stay up there if it's so heavy? Well, it gets up there by evaporation. Really? That's a nice word. What's it mean? It means that the water sort of stops being water for a while so it can go up and not down. I see. Then how does it get down? Well, condensation happens. What's that? The water starts becoming water again by gathering around little dust particles between .00001 and .0001 centimeters wide. That's small.

What about the salt? Salt? Yes, the Mediterranean Sea is salt water. That would kill the crops. What about the salt? Well, the salt has to be taken out. Oh. So the sky picks up a billion pounds of water from the sea and takes out the salt and then carries it for three hundred miles and then dumps it on the farm?

Well it doesn't dump it. If it dumped a billion pounds of water on the farm, the wheat would be crushed. So the sky dribbles the billion pounds water down in little drops. And they have to be big enough to fall for one mile or so without evaporating, and small enough to keep from crushing the wheat stalks.

How do all these microscopic specks of water that weigh a billion pounds get heavy enough to fall (if that's the way to ask the question)? Well, it's called coalescence. What's that? It means the specks of water start bumping into each other and join up and get bigger. And when they are big enough, they fall. Just like that? Well, not exactly, because they would just bounce off each other instead of joining up, if there were no electric field present. What? Never mind. Take my word for it.

I think, instead, I will just take Job's word for it. I still don't see why drops ever get to the ground, because if they start falling as soon as they are heavier than air, they would be too small not to evaporate on the way down, but if they wait to come down, what holds them up till they are big enough not to evaporate? Yes, I am sure there is a name for that too. But I am satisfied now that, by any name, this is a great and unsearchable thing that God has done. I think I should be thankful - lots more thankful than I am.

--John Piper

"Who has cleft a channel for the torrents of rain
and a way for the thunderbolt,
to bring rain on a land where no man is,
on the desert in which there is no man,
to satisfy the waste and desolate land,
and to make the ground sprout with grass?

Has the rain a father,
or who has begotten the drops of dew?
From whose womb did the ice come forth,
and who has given birth to the frost of heaven?
The waters become hard like stone,
and the face of the deep is frozen."

Job 38:25-30

The Time of our Lives

2010-03-22T03:51:00.005-04:00

Thinking about the OWC (Older Women's Club) I recently saw this statement: "Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional!" I think this pretty much summarizes the spirit of the age. People of all ages are running from the responsibilities that attend their aging. Even a retirement community slogan reads, "this the time of your life to have the time of your life."

This approach to aging is antithetical to biblical teaching. We will see in coming weeks what are the responsibilities of older women but for today we will answer the question: Who is an "older woman"?

As we have said before, everyone is older than someone and can therefore be a teacher to someone, and everyone is younger than someone and therefore we all can learn from someone. But who, exactly, is Paul referring to in this passage? Is there a particular group of women that bears the greater responsibility to teach younger women?

I think it is women who have completed or are nearing completion of their childbearing and child rearing years. Paul wrote in 1 Timothy 5:9,10 that widows could be put on a list for receiving support from the church at the age of 60. A few verses later in that chapter Paul says that "younger widows [are to] marry, bear children, manage their households." So it seems there is a line of distinction made between younger and older based on their biological ability to bear children and manage them.

Believing women who are no longer having babies or raising those babies have experienced much in their life. They have experienced God, learned from His word, experienced the good of the Gospel in their sin, and witnessed God's promises to be true. They have lived through trials and joys, and seen God's sovereign hand in both. They have learned what is of greatest importance and are abiding in Christ. They have learned what are the best ways of home management, learned lessons in marriage and parenting. They are a rich source of spiritual and practical counsel. Also, women in this season of life have more time to spend with younger women because they are not so easily distracted by the demands of a young family.

And so, here is my question for the members of OWC: Are you ready to embrace the call of God for you in this season? Or is "growing up" still optional for you? Are you resisting the spirit of the age that insists we can now have "the time of our lives"? Or do you need to re-evaluate your preferences and priorities to allow you the freedom to fulfill your responsibilities in the OWC?

Actually, I do think we will have the time of our lives when we embrace our call as the older women of God. This is where we will find the great joy and blessing.

Living the Cross Centered Life (1)

2010-03-19T05:27:00.000-04:00

What is the most important thing in your life? What is the one essential that you absolutely could not live without? Where does your mind go in your free moments? What does your mouth speak of when someone is listening? What is the one word that someone thinks of when they think of you? What is the one goal you are working for? What catches your interest and keeps your attention? What cause gets your most passionate work? What is the lens through which you view life and history? What gives you the greatest joy and contentment? What angers you? What motivates you? What, above all other things, has the priority?

These are a few of the questions with which CJ Mahaney begins Living the Cross Centered Life. I don't know about you, but that's intimidating to me. My honest answers are a little scattered--a hobby here, a talent there, a friend, a doctrine, a cause, a feeling, an experience. Mostly good things. But as one of Mahaney's friends says, "Take a good thing; make it a god-thing--that's a bad thing."

Mahaney writes on pages 14-15, "Nothing else--not even things that are biblical and honorable--are of equal or greater importance than this: God sent His Son to the cross to bear His wrath for sinners like you and me. If there's anything in life we should be passionate about, it's the gospel."

I'm excited to dig deeper into this book, not that the book will do anything in and of itself, but that God will use it to soften my heart and reveal to me my sin and draw me closer to Him.

If you don't have one already, I hope you pick up a copy of the book at the TFC bookstore on Sunday! Read fifteen minutes a day, and by God's grace we'll come out in the end more in love with Him than when we began.

Teach Your Children

2010-03-18T08:05:00.006-04:00

Dear Sisters in Christ,

Brooke asked me to contribute a post on modesty. After giving this much thought and prayer I felt compelled to address the subject of modesty and little girls. There were many directions I could have chosen, such as modesty and sons (teaching them to respect women and teaching them to dress modestly themselves - which is a responsibility I've had for many many years). But that topic and other aspects of modesty will have to wait for a future time.

I am sure you will all agree with me that our culture places an inordinate emphasis on beauty. Join that with the message of building self-esteem and we get a culture of young girls who are bold, self-absorbed and immodest (inwardly and outwardly).

Compare that with how scripture describes a beautiful woman: "Do not let your adorning be external - the braiding of hair, the wearing of gold, or the putting on of clothing - but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious" (1 Peter 3:3,4).

This verse is not telling us we cannot wear jewelry or braid our hair. If it was saying that, then it would also be saying we are not to put on clothing!! What this verse is telling us is that our clothing, hairstyle and jewelry, (nail polish, makeup, tattoes, etc) are not to be what we give our primary attention to. Neither is it to be what draws the attention of others.

The adornment that is valued by God is a gentle and quiet spirit. If it is valued by God, this should be where our values lie as well.

I will leave you now, with a series of questions, with very little comment. I hope and pray you will find these helpful:

- How well are you adorning your young daughters?

- Do you find yourself thinking overly much about your daughters' physical appearance?

- Are you as concerned to pray for your daughters' heart as you are concerned about their outward appearance?

- What do your daughters hear most from you? Words of praise for how pretty they look or words of praise when they demonstrate humility?

- Are you instructing your daughters in having a gentle and quiet spirit? Or are you unwittingly encouraging them to be bold and demanding of their own way and choices?

- Do your daughters observe in you a godly balance between adorning the outward and developing inward beauty? They learn by your example.

- Do your little girls wear styles that will have to change when they enter puberty (bikinis, short-shorts or halter tops or exposed bellies)? What may be worn innocently now may be difficult to change when they are teenagers.

- Most importantly, does your daughter understand (or at least hear you speak and demonstrate) the connection between pursuing modesty and developing a gentle and quiet spirit, and the Gospel of Jesus Christ?

- Do you share these convictions with your friends and find encouragement from other moms of daughters? "Let us consider how to spur one another on toward love and good works" (Hebrews 13:24).

I have a tremendous respect for the mothers of young girls. Yours is a very high calling. I hope that in some way this post further equips you for fulfilling your God-given responsibility to teach your daughters in the truths of God (Deut. 6:4-7).

With love,
Gayline

Helpful Modesty Resource

2010-03-17T08:39:00.004-04:00

The most helpful resource I ever encountered on modesty: "The Soul of Modesty" by C.J. Mahaney. Go to Sovereigngraceministries.org--the sermon can be downloaded for free in the resource section.

A dear college friend directed me to this sermon--I will be forever grateful.

Soli Deo Gloria!

Getting Practical

2010-03-16T18:00:00.002-04:00

"Perception is reality."

It's a phrase we hear often enough. How does it apply to modesty?

My perception of the appropriateness of a particular piece of clothing often becomes my reality. It's cute. It's in style. The color looks good on me. Really good. So that becomes enough for me.

I've learned it's best to have at least one other set of eyes check it out before it's a go. This is often my mom. She and I have developed quite a system and it makes shopping, well, a breeze. But as many of you know, my mom doesn't live around the corner, or even within driving distance. She's a plane ride away.

So I've also learned that I have to make reality come to life in an effort to override my perception if necessary. I think about the things that I do every day and the movements I make (I have a toddler, so there's a lot to think about!). Then I test out the clothing by doing those very things in the dressing room. I bend over. I raise my arms. I squat. I sit down. T-shirt, jeans, sweater, skirt, it doesn't matter--everything has to pass these tests or it doesn't come home with me.

It's not over when I leave the store. I get home and do the same thing again. The lighting is different, and there's a little more room to move around. And the ultimate safety valve is there: my husband. Not only is he another set of eyes, he's another set of eyes on a man. We all know that men and women see things differently. And when it comes to clothing, a man's perception is reality, whether we like it or not. Don't have a husband? Your dad or your brother or your son can fulfill this role for you.

Modesty takes a bit of work, but in the end it's worth it. We're loving our brothers in Christ when we take the time to dress appropriately. More importantly we're loving Christ. And he gets the glory.

And the winner is...

2010-03-15T21:27:00.003-04:00

Leah! Congratulations on winning a copy of our next book: Living the Cross Centered Life. Catch up with Brooke on Sunday to claim your prize.

Hope to see more comments about the impact of Dug Down Deep even though the contest is over.

Thanks everyone!

The OWC

2010-03-14T07:56:00.004-04:00

Do you get a little inward shudder when you read the words, "older women?" I never thought I would, but I do.

From my teen years well into my thirties I always wanted to look older. When I was a mother with 4 small children, people often thought I was their babysitter. I guess I should have taken this as a compliment but I didn't. I wanted to appear appropriately mature for the role and responsibilities that were mine. The last thing I wanted was to look like a teenager!!

I've learned that I must be careful what I wish for! My hair began greying in my early forties and now I am completely grey (or silver, as one son describes it: a silver crown).

It is time for me to recognize I have joined the OWC (Older Women Club). I do not mind "looking" old. What makes me drop to my knees is the attending responsibilities of membership in this time honored society of seasoned womanhood (but more on that in future posts). For now I want to ask you how you feel about the OWC?

Are you frightened by the thought of belonging to, or someday becoming a member of the OWC? If so, what do you fear?

Might it be the loss of youthful beauty: skin tone, muscle tone, loss of hair color? I find it interesting that where hair pigmentation is lost, skin color deepens, as spots appear and veins show through (the same son who told me I have a silver crown also affectionately said my hands look like raw turkey skin). I also am finding that hair thins where there should be hair, and it grows where it shouldn't!!

Might it be physical weakness or forgetfulness, or a host of age related infirmities? I can put a check mark by each of these.

Might it be the sense of loneliness that can come with aging, as the house is quieter and cleaner and you face empty nesting and the likelihood of becoming widowed.

Might it be a fear of feeling useless?

Might it be a fear of financial insecurity?

Might it be a fear of dying? not death itself, but the process of our "outer nature wasting away" (2 Cor. 4:16).

My dear sisters in Christ, we need not fear. The same God who led Sarah on a journey into the unknown with Abraham, and provided for Naomi in her old age and blessed elderly Anna for her service in the temple, is the same God we serve. These women were not very much different than we are. They were tempted to fear just as we are. Surely Sarah worried about giving birth in her 90s, and surely the widows in the early church wondered where their next meal was coming from. But God was with them and God provided for them.

Proverbs 31:25b tells us that the woman who fears the Lord, "laughs at the time to come." How can older women laugh at the time to come? It is by having a rock solid understanding of God's sovereign and personal care of us (Isaiah 43:1-3b). It is in reminding ourselves of all what Christ accomplished for us on the cross (He who did not spare His own Son, how will he not freely give us all things? [Romans 8:32]). And after that, by living according to His purpose for us. It is in the humble faith-filled living out of Proverbs 31, Titus 2, 1 Timothy 5, 1 Peter 3, Matthew, Mark, Luke and John through Revelation, we are promised the presence, protection and provision of God.

This is where we will find eternal meaning and a present fulfillment for our lives as older women.

Will you join the OWC? or at least learn what it is about? I feel humbled and honored that God would call me to join the ranks with charter members such as Sarah, Naomi, Anna, Eunice, Lois and the godly women still alive who are faithfully and humbly keeping their membership active. I hope you do as well.

Next week: membership age requirements!!

Our First Contest

2010-03-13T10:00:00.002-05:00

Yep, you read that right: a contest.

How do you enter? It's simple: leave a comment and let us know how Dug Down Deep has impacted you.

The prize: a copy of our next book, Living the Cross Centered Life.

Already have the book? Don't fret. We'll reimburse you for the cost (if you just bought it) or we'll make sure you get a copy of the next book on the list that's not yet in your collection.

The winner will be selected randomly by numbered drawing, which is code for "we'll pick a number out of a hat."

We'll announce the winner on Monday night, and the clock starts... now!

So, go ahead, leave a comment. You might just win a book.

Dug Down Deep (4)

2010-03-12T10:15:00.003-05:00

For our final post on Dug Down Deep, I'd like to cover the concepts discussed in chapters 7-11. If you missed the summary of chapters 3-6, you can check them out here.

We begin in chapter 7 with The Doctrine of Salvation.

Also known as redemption applied, or how Jesus' accomplishment (see chapters 5 and 6) connects to us and how it reaches and saves us. Our condition pre-salvation: "We are not just weak, we are spiritually lifeless, dead (Ephesians 2:1)" (p. 125). What happens during the salvation process?

1. Regeneration - What Jesus speaks of when he says "born again." It is "new life brought about by the work of God's Spirit" (p. 130). We cannot do this in ourselves.
2. Repentance - To turn away from something, renounce it.
3. Faith - Believing "that Jesus can forgive and, by his death, cleanse us from all our guilt" (p. 136).
4. Justification - Declared righteous, because Jesus is righteous. We are given new legal status--we are given Christ's righteousness, He is given our guilt.
5. Adoption - God makes us part of his family--his sons and daughters--and he becomes our Father.

Now what? Sanctification.

Sanctification is "the ongoing process of change that begins the moment a person is saved and continues until that person's last breath. Sanctification is the journey of becoming holy, becoming like God" (p. 149). It is not an optional endeavor, for by it we show we know and love Jesus--though it has nothing to do with earning salvation. "We are saved only by grace (Ephesians 2:8). But the way we live proves the reality of our salvation" (p. 151). In short, we have been changed with a new life, a new family, and in our status by the work of Christ; we are being changed through repentance and faith and sanctification; and we will be changed fully and forever at Jesus' return with new bodies free from sin.

However, we are still enticed by our old desires, what the Bible calls "the flesh" and what theology calls indwelling or remaining sin. "Jesus broke the power of sin, but until we're in heaven, we still live with the presence and influence of sinful desires. Don't think it's a stalemate" (p. 159). It's not something we can live at peace with. We must fight it. It may be tempting to feed the flesh because we've already been freed from sin by the cross, but the flesh can grow into a huge problem and stifle our sanctification. Instead we should starve the flesh. "The reality of God's grace should never be an excuse to be unconcerned about holiness.... Grace doesn't lull us into indifference toward righteousness. It trains us and compels us toward self-control and godliness" (p. 164).

What's great is that being aware of sin gives us hope when we connect it with the gospel.

1. It explains life - why we are not free from temptation
2. It gives patience towards other Christians who are also fighting against indwelling sin
3. It brings humility - we become aware of our weakness, God's ongoing work, and that sweeps away self-righteousness

Okay, so what is sin? It is rebellion, "a willful choice from the heart to make something besides God our ultimate concern" (p. 166). Part of dealing with sin is repentance, which we discussed earlier (the other part is grace). But what are we turning to? Obedience based on convictions, "heart-level, settled belief[s] before God that [don't] change with our environment.... something we believe... because we are convinced it's what God would have us believe (p. 170). We must strive to become like Jesus, not just by not doing wrong but by pursuing obedience--"actively doing righteousness" (p. 171). We do this because we love Jesus and that's what it's all about.

Question: Are you aware of an area in your life needing sanctification that you've been avoiding? Maybe it's how you talk to your kids, or showing respect to your unbelieving husband, or gossiping at work. Does the idea of obedience as loving Jesus change your sense of need for change?

The Doctrine of the Holy Spirit

Whether you're cessasionist (believe the gifts ended with the last apostles) or continuationist (believe the gifts continue today), Harris focuses us on our common ground as believers: the Holy Spirit exists. So what do we know about him?

1. The Holy Spirit is God
2. The Holy Spirit is a person
3. The Holy Spirit partners with the Father and the Son in the work of salvation
4. The Holy Spirit is active in our sanctification

Jesus himself referred to the Holy Spirit as another Helper or Counselor. The Greek words is "paraclete," which means "one who advocates for, defends, counsels, encourages, comforts, and helps" (p. 192).

Question: "There is no greater gift that God bestows than the gift of his Spirit. Are you aware of how he is working in you?" (p. 186, emphasis added). Start paying attention even in the "mundane" things in your life and see where God shows you his Spirit actively working.

The Doctrine of the Church

Harris says it best: "Most Christians neglect the doctrine of the church.... How can we claim to know and love Jesus and yet be indifferent toward his bride, his temple, his family, his own body? Can I say that I love Jesus but hate the wife he cherishes? Can I say I enjoy spending time with him but refuse to enter his house? Can I claim friendship with Jesus but think his body is repulsive? It's not possible.... What if we learned that the church was so precious to Jesus that he was willing to shed his own blood to obtain it?" (p. 197-199).

Many treat the church as a gas station--a place to fill up on Sundays and then move right along. But as Harris puts it, "It's the bus I'm supposed to be traveling on" (p. 203). And it's not a trip we take alone, but rather with other believers.

There are two essential elements of a church:

1. Right preaching of God's word - this means presenting the gospel, "Jesus' substitutionary death and resurrection for sinners as its central message" (p. 203).
2. Right practice of baptism and communion - these things "[reemphasize] the necessity of the church being a defined community fixated on the gospel of Jesus Christ" (p. 203).

"Christians are to join an assembly not just for their own spiritual health but so that the world around them can clearly see the reality of Jesus Christ" (p. 205). "God's purpose for me is inextricably tied to his purpose for his people" (p. 207). The world can't see God. The church is how they see him. We are representing him to the world as we join our lives together in the church. But we can't do this only by hanging out in our local church. We must go into the world and show them a different way, a better way: the transforming power of the crucified, risen Christ. "The advance of God's kingdom takes time. And contact" (p. 213). And love has to fuel this mission: "He told us just to love him, love each other, and love the world by telling them about him" (p. 214).

Question: What is one way you can advance the kingdom of God this week, even from the boundaries of your home, in the way you teach your kids, or your attitude at your job?

Humble Orthodoxy

To refresh, orthodoxy means right thinking about God. What's he getting at with the humble part? "Whether our theological knowledge is great or small, we all need to ask a vital question: what will we do with the knowledge of God that we have? Will it lead us to an ever-growing desire to know and love the Lord? Will it practically affect the way we think and live? Will we have the courage to hold on to the truth even when it isn't popular/ And how will we express our beliefs? With humility--or with pride?" (p. 218).

Okay, so we want to be humble in our knowledge of God, but what does that look like?

1. Strong commitment to sound doctrine
2. Courageous standing for biblical truth
3. Gracious in words and interaction with other people - "Genuine orthodoxy--the heart of which is the death of God's Son for undeserving sinners--is the most humbling, human-pride-smashing message in the world. And if we truly konw the gospel of grace, it will create in us a heart of humility and grace toward others.... The humility we need in our theology is first and foremost a humility before God" (p. 225).

Question: In your teaching of your children, in your living of life before unbelieving coworkers, in your handling of conflict with your husband, are you putting the beauty of God's truth on display or are you obscuring it?

Next week, Jenny will kick off the discussion of our next book, Living the Cross Centered Life, by C.J. Mahaney, which we start on Monday, March 15. Make sure to stop by the bookstore this Sunday to pick up a copy.

Blind Spots

2010-03-11T05:23:00.000-05:00

At my job I see hundreds and hundreds of people every day. If you were looking for someone with a keen eye to pick out what's modest and what's not on women aged 4-70, I'm your girl. One of the strangest phenomenons that I've noticed is when you see what looks like a seventeen-year old standing with her back to you--and then she turns around and you realize that she's forty-three. Or nine. It's sad. But not my point. That was for free.

If you want someone to identify and label what's modest and what's not on other people, I'm your girl.

What I'm not so good at is identifying what's modest or immodest for me.

If you've ever read a novel written in the first person, then it's likely that you, as the spectator, know a lot more about the character than the character knows about herself. She has inadvertently revealed herself to you, and she doesn't even know it.

We can be just like that in our lives, totally blind to what is totally obvious to everyone else. That could mean you have a blind spot in your literal mirror. Or it could be something deeper in your character.

I'm blessed to have a sister who is concerned about my modesty, both outward and inward. She is faithful to prevent outward immodesty and to correct inward immodesty. I need it, because I can have huge blind spots.

Find a friend, sister, mother, daughter, cousin, in-law, caregroup member--someone who loves Jesus Christ more than she loves you, and ask her to point out your blind spots. It could hurt. It usually happens that what gets pointed out is something I never expected, or something that was just "me" and my personality, and it stings! But I'm better for it. Or maybe she won't think of anything. Don't relax. This is part of a lifetime of wartime: sanctification.

This isn't a call for us to nitpick and judge each other. It's a call for each of us to take responsibility for ourselves by asking someone else to speak into our lives. This is one-anothering. This is the pursuit of becoming conformed to the image of Christ to the glory and praise of God.

A matter of the heart

2010-03-10T07:43:00.005-05:00

Confession: I have been immodest.

And not in the way you would think.

I had grown up being very conscious of modesty. I never liked anyone to see too much of my body, even if it was covered with clothes. When the school uniform required x-length shorts and skirts, mine were always at least an inch or two longer than the requirement. This was partly because I was short and so things were generally longer on me, but I could have had things shortened. I preferred not to push the limit.

I was on the basketball team my first two years at college. I wore a lot of windpants and tshirts. And if it wasn't windpants it was loose fitting jeans. Let's just say it wasn't very feminine. Even after I stopped playing, I maintained the image for the most part. It was easier. I was comfortable.

In spite of my attire, I received attention from one of the guys, and we began dating. I began to dress less like a jock, although I'm pretty sure I still came up short of feminine. It really just meant less windpants.

We dated for over a year. Then he left me for another girl.

As you can imagine, I was hurt. I was angry. I was desperate to get him back. It was like a switch clicked inside my brain. I began to use my body and the way that I dressed as a weapon. I would show him what he was missing.

Even during that time, I don't think I dressed immodestly, at least not very often. If anything, it was a step towards dressing more feminine. But my heart... oh, my heart was as immodest as it gets. My heart was filled with pride, bent on manipulation, and empty of care for others. I was outwardly clean but inwardly dirty. A whitewashed tomb of sorts. It took me a long time to acknowledge that what I was doing was sinful. I think I always knew it, I just wasn't willing to admit it.

Modesty isn't just about low necklines, exposed midriff, or skirt length. It is first and foremost a matter of the heart. Are you a woman who examines her clothing? Great. But more importantly, are you a woman who examines her heart?

*p.s. Thankfully, I didn't get that guy back, and now I have my husband, Tim--a man far better than the one I thought I'd lost.

Modesty--In and Out

2010-03-08T21:22:00.004-05:00

Warm weather approaches!!!!!

I will be sorry to see the last of the snow melt and to have no more clear, frosty nights. There's something so cozy about Winter. Not to mention, it is a lot easier to find modest clothing when it's cold out!

In anticipation of the fast-approaching warm weather, Women By Design will be doing a few posts on modesty.

Probably nothing will be said that we all haven't heard before. Our desire is to simply bring to remembrance and reinforce Biblical principles you already know in fresh new ways.

So you're probably waiting for a list of 'don't wear this' and 'avoid this.' Well, the reason why conversations on modesty often quickly race toward the issue of clothing is because, well, clothing says a lot about a person. In other words, we can't see what is in a woman's heart, but we can see what is on her outside.

There are helpful guides, such as TFC's modesty handout and Sovereign Grace Ministries' modesty checklist. There are also good books, sermons, and lectures on the subject.

God grant us the grace and the sensitivity to detect any immodesty in our hearts, in our appearance, and in our manner. If there are no places left in our society where modesty is valued or practiced, let the church stand firm. We must "draw others to imitate [us] in good," as Richard Baxter says in his Christian Directory (Soli Deo Gloria Publications, pg. 393).

We have a responsibility toward the world--we must not ease their consciences' regarding their wickedness.

We ought to love our fellow brothers and sisters in the Lord--not tempting our sisters to "envy and to imitate" and our brothers to "lust and wantonness." (Ibid.)

Most of all, we are to obey our heavenly Father, joyfully. The 'want to,' not the 'have to.' The "Be holy, for I am holy" (1 Peter 1:16) kind of living.

There is the danger of outwardly complying, yet inwardly rebelling. There's that thinking, "I can't believe she's wearing that! I would never wear that!!!" Secretly, in your heart, you wish your mom would let you wear that fashion or you wish you were thinner so you could 'pull it off' or you desire the envy of women and the attention of men. God is not mocked; He is not fooled by outward appearances.

There is no limit to the grace God showers upon His children. We can strive for a truly modest spirit because our Father gives us the ability to do what He commands us to do. Has the Lord given you victory in this area? What means of grace did God provide you with to grow in modesty (people, resources, etc.)?

Teachers and Learners

2010-03-07T16:06:00.007-05:00

I'm back from a week of vacation with Tim. It was wonderful. A whole week of vacation, just the two of us. The first time we've ever done that. It was sweet. Very, very restful and a good time of reconnection. Though I didn't come back with a tan I did come back with a smile.

But because there is laundry to do, a menu to plan, groceries to buy and a house to clean (again!) this may be brief. Right about now I'm thinking someone should start a business called, "Vacation Magician". I'd be tempted to pay someone almost anything for me to be able to come home to a full refrigerator, a hot meal and someone to hand over all the unpleasant duties of re-entry into the real world. But, alas, this is life in my real world, and when I finally put my "hand to the plow", it does feel good. This is where I belong. This is my calling and it is GOOD.

If I could jump ahead in this series from Titus 2, I'd have a lot of inspiring words for young women to love their husbands! A romantic get-a-way away will do that! But I am going to try to stay on course with a somewhat systematic approach to this. So today I'll just give you a glimpse of what's ahead.

Paul tells us there are teachers and there are learners. So we will be spending several weeks looking at the teachers: both their character qualities and the content of their teaching. Then we'll look at the learners, who they are and what is to be the attitude of a humble learner.

But before we do, today can I ask you all, no matter what your age or stage of life, to be open to reading and being shaped by Titus 2? You may not be married. You may be a divorcee. You may be childless. You may be a teenager. Believe it or not, there is something here for you. I can guarantee it because it is God's Word and God's word is relevant for us all. For example, if you are single and you read about loving your husband you will have a choice. You can choose to skip the reading because it doesn't seem to apply to you, or you can read it and learn what loving a husband looks like. You can do this because you can prepare yourself for the day you might have a husband, and you can learn what loving a husband means so that you can encourage your married sisters.

I hope to bring application to all women, but please hang in there with me if you do not find an immediate application. We are all teachers and learners, no matter what is our age and stage of life and spiritual growth. We all have women we can learn from and there will always be women, teens and young girls younger than us who we can teach. Even if we've made a lot of mistakes through sinful choices. God is all about redeeming our lives in spite of all our baggage. He wants to turn our ashes into fire that burns brightly for His Kingdom. We are all spiritual Cinderella's: broken, lonely, lost. In Christ we are restored, given a family, a kingdom and a purpose. We all have much we can teach and we all have more we can learn.

How has this been your experience?

I'd love to hear who your teachers have been and who is learning from you?

Gotta go. The "To Do List" is calling.

On the Lighter Side

2010-03-06T14:00:00.000-05:00

Do you ever find yourself in Shop-Rite singing under your breath to a song you haven't heard in twenty years and then think to yourself how on earth do I remember these words?

Do you ever wonder how your kids can effortlessly memorize hundreds of songs, but can't study their history or English grammar?

Do you find yourself wishing you had a Scripture verse memorized for every silly song you knew?

Well, have I got just the thing for you! The folks at Forever Grateful Music have produced a series of albums called Hide the Word. Each album has between 18-25 Scripture verses set to music. They are really good!

And I think you'll like them. Do you enjoy the music we sing on Sunday mornings? Then you'll enjoy these. Pastor Mark Altrogge is the mastermind behind the Hide the Word albums, the same Mark Altrogge who is responsible for many of the worship songs that we enjoy at TFC. Pastor Altrogge ministers at one of our sister churches, Sovereign Grace Church of Indiana, PA, and many of his songs have been featured on Sovereign Grace Music albums.

Here's what Pastor Altrogge has to say:

"I began putting Scripture to music many years ago and found that I was able to memorize the Scriptures much more quickly. Then when I had children, I did the same for them and found that they were able to learn the verses fairly easily. That's what gave me the idea for Hide the Word."

Hide the Word combines the power of music with the power of repetition to make memorizing God's Word easy. Each Scripture, including its reference, is made into a song. Each Scripture is repeated at least 3 times per song. As you play the music while driving, doing dishes, or any other time throughout your day, you will find yourself quickly picking up the verses and recalling them from memory.

This is an investment worth making!

Dug Down Deep (3)

2010-03-05T13:15:00.010-05:00

We've been reading and learning about some serious foundational concepts of the Christian faith in our current book, Dug Down Deep, by Joshua Harris. Bedrock really. I thought we'd take a moment to review some of these ideas, which hopefully now don't look so big and scary.

First up: Theology

In chapter 3, Josh tells us that theology is the study of God--God's church, God's plan of salvation, God's work in us to make us like Jesus, etc. More specifically, there is theology proper, or the doctrine of God--who God is and what he is like. Why is this important? "What we think about God--what we understand about his character and his attributes--shapes our understanding of every other doctrine and even life itself" (p. 39). What are some of these characteristics and attributes?

1. I am created / God is creator
2. I have a beginning / God is eternal
3. I am dependent / God is self-existent
4. I am limited in space / God is omnipresent
5. I am limited in power / God is almighty
6. I am limited in knowledge / God is all-knowing

In short, God is qualitatively different from us. He is holy, which deals not just with moral purity but with God as "separate from his creation in his perfection and power.... transcendent.... above us and beyond us" (p. 43).

Question: How does your concept of God affect your everyday life as an employee, a wife, a mom, a sister, a grandmother, a daughter, a widow, a friend?

The Doctrine of Scripture

What is the Bible? Where does it come from? What are its characteristics? How are we supposed to read and obey it? These are all questions answered by the the doctrine of Scripture. In chapter 4, we see that one major facet in the doctrine of Scripture is the necessity of Scripture--the Bible is "necessary for us to know and obey God" (p. 57). Without it we would not know the heart of God towards his people. Then we read about three major components of the doctrine of Scripture:

1. Inerrancy - "It is totally true--free from error--in all it affirms" (p. 68).
2. Clarity - It is self-interpreting.
3. Sufficiency - It gives us "all we need to know for salvation and eternal life" (p. 69).

Josh sums it up best: "The Bible is the story of what God has done for us. We don't come to it to receive instructions on saving ourselves. It's not a list of rules and guidelines that we must follow perfectly in order to earn our way into God's favor. The Bible is the story of what he has done. It's the story of how every man-made effort at salvation fails and only the grace of God can rescue and redeem sinners" (p. 72).

Question: Does a limited view of Scripture cause you to refer to other sources for answers to the situations in your life: a conflict with a co-worker, a misbehaving child, an unbelieving husband?

The Doctrine of the Person and Work of Christ

The person is who Jesus is. The work is what he has done for us. In chapter 5 we see that in order to rightly understand the person of Christ, we must see that he was both God and man at the same time. He was truly God, and proved his divine nature through the virgin conception, supernatural miracles, and his own claims of equality with God. And he was also truly man, born by a human mother, grew and developed, hungered and thirsted, experienced human emotions, grew tired, etc. What did this God-man come to do? "The work he came to accomplish is nothing less than the setting right of all that is wrong--in our relationship with God, in our hearts, in creation, in the whole universe.... Jesus didn't come only to save me, forgive my sins, and improve my life. He does all this, but this is only a small part of a much bigger picture" (p. 87).

Question: How often are you affected by the fact that God himself died for your sins?

Atonement

Atonement "speaks of how sinful, guilty men and women can have a restored relationship with a perfectly good and righteous God..." (p. 98). It's part of what the work of Christ accomplished. There are three keys to understanding atonement. First, the trinitarian nature of God. "The Father, Son, and Holy Spirit worked together to save mankind.... at the cross, God himself both delivered and received the blow" (p. 101). An amazing concept. Second, the holiness and justice of God. "Because God is holy and just, no one will get away with anything in this life" (p. 104). God must punish sin, because if he doesn't, he ceases to be holy and just. Third, our own guilt and sin before God. "We all carry around some sense that we've done wrong, that we haven't measured up to the standards of others or to our own standards--much less the standards of God.... Our problem is far greater than we imagine" (p. 105, 110).

"The unimaginable message of the Bible is that God's love for us is so great that he made a way for us to be good again though the atoning life and death of his Son" (p. 111). As we saw earlier, Jesus came to reconcile us to God--that is the work of Christ. He did so by penal substitution--he paid the penalty for our sins. He died taking our punishment upon himself. And what is the result of this work? Propitiation--the satisfying and turning away of God's wrath. This could not be done of our own will or power or work, it had to be done by Jesus himself.

"There is a way to be good again. It is to trust in Jesus and his atoning death" (p. 115).

Question: Are you constantly trying to "be better at," "work harder at" overcoming anger at your child, disrespect towards your husband, or gossiping at work? Or are you trusting in Jesus' atoning work to cover your sins and to change who you are from the inside out?

Next week, we'll take a look at the concepts covered in chapters 7-11. And we'll start up with our next book, Living the Cross Centered Life, by C.J. Mahaney, on Monday, March 15. Make sure to stop by the bookstore this Sunday to order a copy.

How to Love Your Sister Pt. 2

2010-03-03T21:42:00.005-05:00

I was the bully. Jenny was the drama queen.
I cut holes in Jenny's afghan...just 'cause. Jenny wailed as if her world, and not just a blanket, was crumbling around her.

I was the tomboy. Jenny was the little princess.
I collected frogs and slugs. Jenny dressed up in princess outfits to visit the library.

I was the logical mathematician. Jenny was the creative writer.
My world had to be explainable and knowable. Jenny delighted in the unexplainable and unknowable.

So how in the world do two wholly different people commune peaceably, or joyfully? We have learned to start at the cross and work outward. Forgiveness becomes simple when you know just how much has been forgiven you in Christ.

For me, I only found the desire/strength/will to love my sister after asking the Lord for it. I didn't want the superficial "she's family so I love her" front, but a real, sacrificial "one-anothering" kind of love. That's a Spirit-given, Jesus-kind of love. The only "answer" to how to love your sister is prayer.

There are, however, several practical "rules" Jenny and I try to practice.

1. No pop psychology! All counsel and advice must come from the Bible! We are not the other's foundation or support. We aim to point each other toward God as our foundation.

2. When we drive anywhere, before we pull out of the driveway we lay down guidelines for our behavior toward each other. The number one guideline is that God is sovereign over everything. Everything that happens is for our good. And we both have permission to remind each other of that as often as needed. Traffic, rainstorms, flat tires, hunger, getting lost, and GPS failure are all under God's providence.

We have set up that whoever is not driving controls the iPod. That's practical. Whoever is driving gets to control the internal temperature of the car (which means an Arctic to Saharan difference). When things break down, we are learning to pray together for our Father's forgiveness. No more blameshifting and excusemaking! Sin is sin.

3. We cook together, which can be a challenge! Remember what I said about the logician and the dreamer? Different kitchen worldviews! We have a joke that our cooking together means I cook while Jenny watches from her stool in the corner. God's grace has shown me patience and even a chuckle or two, like when she can't measure water or burns the kitchen floor or explodes half of dinner in the blender. It's funny. We laugh together, knowing that in light of eternity, it's just not a big deal. (In fact, we're both giggling as I write this remembering how just a few hours ago Jenny sent dinner all over the kitchen.) Godly love doesn't just overlook weaknesses, but seeks to strengthen it. So now we cook together, and I teach her technique. And she reciprocates in her area of strength.

4. We enjoy each other, forgiving when necessary, correcting when necessary, always preaching the Gospel to each other. We read good books to each other and listen to good preachers together. Our fellowship is in Christ.

We have far to go, but I'm so thankful for the grace that has brought us farther than we would have thought possible. There a hundreds of ways to show love to "that person" in your life. Many are practical, but those practicalities will only flow from the love that Christ has given you. Are you praying for a God-given love? The other person may not respond. God knows. He loved us while we were enemies and hated Him. Only He can give us Christ-like love. Pray!

How to Love Your Sister Pt. 1

2010-03-03T06:30:00.004-05:00

She is your mirror, shining back at you with a world of possibilities. She is your witness, who sees you at your worst and best, and loves you anyway. She is your partner in crime, your midnight companion, someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark. She is your teacher, your defense attorney, your personal press agent, even your shrink. Some days, she's the reason you wish you were an only child.
Barbara Alpert

I get this exclamation a lot, from heavenlings and worldlings alike, that Robin and I are so close! I guess it's rare to see two relatively young* sisters get along so well. It saddens me to think that Robin and I are the exception to the rule, that so many sisters are missing out on the great gift that God has given them. So maybe as an encouragement, Robbie and I thought we would share a little bit about the grace God has given us to be able to overcome our natural enmity, because as we will both tell you, we weren't always close. In fact, we didn't even like each other.

We're only twenty months apart and so share many of the same experiences, which is not at all the same thing as experiencing the same thing.We have very different personalities, very different ways of thinking, and very different quirks--hence, mutual dislike and irritation. Except sisters are sneaky--because we couldn't avoid each other, we learned how to use and manipulate each other. Our relationship was a breeding ground of selfishness.

It wasn't totally bad. You wouldn't look at us and think that we hated each other. We got along tolerably well in public and even enjoyed each other's company--to an extent. I don't feel bad speaking for her, as we've repented about this to each other, but we both used each other. Robin had a car, which meant freedom for me. Robin was really shy, and I was bolder and willing to lead, which meant freedom for her. Privately, we fought over everything, and inflicted cruel words and acts upon each other. As time went on, I began to not know how to live without her--my entire selfish life was bound up in what I could get out of her, whether emotionally or financially.

So, we went off to college together and shared a tiny shoebox-sized room with a third person. That was fun, you betcha. Then we did it a second year. And we did get better, just through the natural maturing process. But our hearts were still selfish and we still used each other and we still fought.

Then everything changed. Through the teaching of one Bible professor on campus, the Holy Spirit began convicting my heart and stirring a desire for holiness in me. I saw my sin as I had never seen it before--my sin, not her sin. I saw my Savior as infinitely dear, infinitely precious, infinitely loving. All of the selfish motives for which I used my sister were revealed as idolatry. I wanted her to be as God to me, and when she failed, I despised her for it.

But once I saw Christ as supremely precious and gloriously sovereign, worthy of worship and adoration, I was freed to love my sister as a fellow creature and as a fellow heir in Christ.

And Robin will continue tomorrow!

*Just for the record, contrary to popular belief, I represent the younger half of this young duo.

Making the Bible Believable

2010-03-02T07:00:00.002-05:00

Frequently when women are given teaching from Titus 2, I've heard them say to me, "Oh no! Not this again!! Can't we move on to other things? Can't we study the deep things of God?"

I appreciate their desire to study Scripture. It is God's will that we be students of His Word (theologians), for it is only the truth of the Gospel (as found in the whole of Scripture) which establishes us firm in our faith, equipping us for every good work, and for every spiritual battle (2 Timothy 2:15,16; Ephesians 6:10-20).

So, why, out of all the books in the Bible, should Titus be one book that women keep coming back to? Shouldn't it be a book that is read once a year like all the other books as part of a "through the Bible in a year" reading program?

Good question.

First of all, the book of Titus isn't a "for women only" book. It is a book that should be often referred to by pastors, older men, young men, and people who work for a boss. There is truth in this book for everyone, no matter what their gender, age, or position. But this book does contain a specific focus for women where we find a specific command to teach and learn and live the Titus 2 way.

Also, there is nothing in this book that isn't taught elsewhere in the Bible. The book of Titus is consistent with the doctrine of manhood and womanhood found throughout scripture. Though this book is short, and could be easily overlooked, it packs a punch with its concise presentation of the Gospel and application to life. When we study the book of Titus, we are being theologians. We are studying theology. This is deep stuff. And it is mysterious. For in this book we learn specifically how the conduct of our lives makes a difference for the effective advance of the Gospel.

Paul realized the only way for the message of the Gospel to be communicated effectively in a culture steeped in a mix of religiosity and secularism was for the believers to live it in such a way as to validate the words spoken. In other words: Live in such a way as to make the Bible believable.

Some women get hung up on the specifics of the "Titus 2 woman." They quickly jump to conclusions about matters like submission and working outside the home. There are extremes in both directions and a lot of fuzzy thinking in between. Some will dogmatically assert that Titus 2 teaches that submission means wearing gingham jumpers, no make-up, homeschooling, and never expressing an opinion. On the other hand, there are others who are quick to assert that Christian women must not be governed by a list of do's and don'ts. They maintain that they must live in the "freedom of Christ" and be all that they can be (just like unsaved women only with Christ's name pinned to the lapel of their business suit). But this is not what makes the Bible believable.

So, what does make the Bible believable? The answer is found in chapter 1:16, "They profess to know God, but they deny him by their works" and 2:5 "... so that the Word of God may not be reviled." The way we live makes the Bible either believable or unbelievable.

Let me put it to you with some questions as food for thought:

Do my children (young or grown) observe my overall lifestyle as being consistent with my profession of faith?
Do my neighbors see a difference in me, other than that they see me pull out of the driveway for church on a Sunday morning?
Do my unsaved family members see what faith looks like?
What do my girlfriends hear me talk about most?

Or:
Do my children think that God is not worth trusting since mommy still worries, frets, and gets angry with daddy?
Do my girlfriends wonder what difference Christ makes when they see me eating too much, talking too much, sleeping too much, and "dissing" my husband?
Do my neighbors wonder if I really mean what I say when I tell them, "God is enough" when I am scrambling to work in order to pay for more stuff?
Do my unsaved family members hear that the husband/wife relationship is to reflect the God the Father and Son's relationship (1 Corinthians 11:3), but get the impression from my marriage that God the Father and God the Son must be in conflict and competing with each other for their own rights?

As Carolyn Mahaney points out: Usually unbelievers are not interested in our doctrine. They are more interested to see if our doctrine works (paraphrase from Teach What Is Good).

For example: One thing most everyone knows about the Bible is that it tells us to "love our neighbor." Many years ago my neighbor changed the placement of her garbage can at the end of her driveway, which meant we needed to change where we placed ours. This really irritated me, and so, rather than love her, I began competing with her for garbage can placement. I thought if I put my can out before she did, then she'd get the point. Well, to make a stupid story short, I was not demonstrating Christ-like love for my neighbor. After several weeks of this silly game I did end up having a helpful, and humble conversation with her where I admitted my anger and asked for her forgiveness, which did open up a conversation about Christ.

Another example: Have you ever had the experience of receiving praise for the kind of marriage you have, or the good kids you have? These are powerful opportunities to witness for Christ. We must clearly communicate to people that it is ONLY because of what Christ has done for us and in us that we can even begin to have a marriage and family that is praiseworthy. When we do not (and I'm sad to say I've been guilty of this as well) we take praise onto ourselves and people lose an opportunity to hear about the Gospel.

"... the church is to have a godly impact on an ungodly world. This is what makes our evangelistic efforts and impact effective and fruitful.

You may claim to have true doctrine, biblical doctrine. In your head you may know true biblical doctrine. But if you’re living in a way that is contrary to the true biblical doctrine, then what you really believe is not true doctrine. Doctrine and life have to match each other (Nancy Leigh DeMoss - Revive Our Hearts ministry).

That's how we make the Bible believable.

Monthly Wrap-Up: February

2010-03-01T14:23:00.004-05:00

Well, it's been one month since the relaunch of the Women By Design blog. We hope you've been blessed this month and that you're feeling comfortable in our new home. Here's the month in review:

We began the month looking at what it means to be a woman by design.

- Gayline encouraged us to embrace our sovereignly designed womanhood
- Brooke talked about her early-life struggle with femininity
- Jenn wrote about her battle with her inner-feminist
- And Robin wrapped up our intro week with a look back at the Garden of Eden and pitfalls we should avoid

After a snowy weekend, Gayline began her Titus 2 series, something you'll want to keep tuning into just about every Monday. Jenn, Robin, and Brooke filled out the week with a series on Proverbs 31.

We also kicked off our What Are You Reading? series, beginning with a new book from Joshua Harris, Dug Down Deep. We hope that you've been reading along and trust that you are enjoying the journey.

In week three, we looked at the implications of theology on everyday life, parenting, and worship. Last week we capped off the month with three posts on humility, pulled straight from TFC's RMMR reading plan.

We hope you'll join us this month as we continue on in Titus 2 and Dug Down Deep, and take a look at sisterhood, modesty, the love of others and more!

On the Lighter Side

2010-02-27T15:32:00.005-05:00

Another two feet of snow???

Dug Down Deep (2)

2010-02-26T16:00:00.002-05:00

How's the reading going? What are you getting out of Dug Down Deep?

One thought in particular grabbed me this week from the chapter, "Ripping, Burning, Eating." On page 64, Josh says, "I guess all humans have wondered, 'When I pray, does God hear me?' But what this story teaches is that the questions we should ask are, 'Am I hearing God through his Word? Am I listening to him? Am I trembling before his Word?'"

This struck me because it has been true of me. I know there is a definite connection to the "bouncing off the ceiling prayers" and my not "listening" to God. Why am I more concerned that God hear me? Shouldn't I be more concerned to hear Him?

Unity and Humility

2010-02-25T18:00:00.003-05:00

I love using my ESV study Bible for my daily reading. The footnotes really help to broaden my thinking about a particular verse, sometimes even a single word in a particular verse. Today I'd just like to share some general thoughts I had about this month's RMMR meditation passage, Philippians 2:1-11, with the help of some of those footnotes.

In Philippians 2:1-2, Paul is encouraging people to unity in the faith. To some this would conjure up toned-down visions of public mind control not unlike George Orwell's Nineteen Eighty-Four. Everyone just think the same way and don't ask questions. But consider this: "[Being of the same mind] does not imply a drab intellectual uniformity; rather, the Philippians are to use their diverse gifts (cf. 1 Corinthians 12) in an agreeable, cooperative spirit, with a focus on the glory of God" (ESV Study Bible, p. 2282). How do we do this? Look back to verse 1 and ask yourself this question: "Are the qualities of encouragement, participation in the Spirit, affection, and sympathy evident in my life?" These are the things that unite us in the faith.

Then in Philippians 2:3-4, Paul goes even further. How can we encourage, love, and sympathize with others when we're all so different? "...Everyone naturally looks out for his or her own interests. The key is to take that same level of concern and apply it also to the interests of others" (ESV Study Bible, p. 2282). I think it's easy for us to say that we think about others, that we esteem them highly. Sure, I extend concern for others in their times of trouble. But do I do so to the same level that I do for myself? Something to think about.

And what does that look like anyway? "Such radical love is rare, so Paul proceeds to show its supreme reality in the life of Christ (Phil. 2:5-11).... Jesus is the paradigm [model] of genuine spiritual progress: not a self-aggrandizing struggle for supremacy, but a deep love for God and neighbor shown in deeds of service" (ESV Study Bible, p. 2282). It looks like the gospel. It looks like being willing to lay your life down for another in the face of great pain and suffering because you know it is ultimately for their good and God's glory.

As a wife, laying down your life might look like making dinner for your husband instead of asking him to pick something up on his way home. As a mom, laying down your life might look like getting down on the floor and playing with your kid(s) when you'd rather be checking out Facebook or watching Hulu. As a single, laying down your life might look like devoting your extra time and money to the church rather than spending it on yourself.

How are you laying down your life?

Practical Advice on Practicing Humility

2010-02-24T20:29:00.008-05:00

I think most Christians know what humility is. We know it when we see it. We most certainly know the opposite of humility when we see it.

We have a perfect example--Christ.

What seems to be difficult is to know how to pursue humility. Doing so with the proper attitude and motivation is always a challenge. But perhaps a greater challenge is intentionally pursuing humility in practical daily ways.

Most of you are familiar with C.J. Mahaney--he exudes practical advice. His book Humility is no exception and is full of practical advice that is applicable, imitable, and extremely helpful.

Mahaney starts with the following words: "I'm a proud man pursuing humility by the grace of God. I don't write as an authority on humility; I write as a fellow pilgrim walking with you on the path set for us by our humble Savior" (p. 13).

So this is what a 'fellow pilgrim' offers as advice on how to 'weaken pride and cultivate humility':

Always:
1. Reflect on the wonder of the cross of Christ.

As Each Day Begins:
2. Begin your day by acknowledging your dependence upon God and your need for God.
3. Begin your day expressing gratefulness to God.
4. Practice the spiritual disciplines--prayer, study of God's Word, worship. Do this consistently each day and at the day's outset, if possible.
5. Seize your commute time to memorize and meditate on Scripture.
6. Cast your cares upon Him, for He cares for you.

As Each Day Ends:
7. At the end of the day, transfer the glory to God.
8. Before going to sleep, receive this gift of sleep from God and acknowledge His purpose for sleep.

For Special Focus:
9. Study the attributes of God.
10. Study the doctrines of grace.
11. Study the doctrine of sin.
12. Play golf as much as possible.
13. Laugh often, and laugh often at yourself.

Throughout Your Days and Weeks:
14. Identify evidences of grace in others.
15. Encourage and serve others each and every day.
16. Invite and pursue correction.
17. Respond humbly to trials.

C.J. Mahaney, Humility: true greatness (Colorado Springs, Multnomah, 2005), 171-172.

Seems easy right??? These suggestions are not put before us to discourage us, but to encourage us toward godliness.

Knowing that the grace needed to grow in humility comes from the Lord and that He graciously gives to His children, let's ask and ask and ask for grace. God delights in conforming His children into the image of His Son.