30 years ago

Thirty years ago today I became a mother for the first time (well, technically I became a mother 9 months earlier). How can someone as young as me have a thirty year old child??? Wasn't it just 5 years ago I was thirty?

I sit here remembering that day when at the Birthing Center Tim and I labored together. We had been trained for this. We knew the phases and stages of labor and knew how to breathe, relax, focus and push. All that was left for us was to hold our baby. That was long before ultrasounds could be used to tell the gender of the baby. The anticipation of finding out girl or boy was for us a big part of the fun of pregnancy. What a moment of joy it was when we heard, "It's a girl!!"

I wish I had been as prepared for parenting as I was for labor and delivery. In many ways we had to learn as we went along. I did not have older women to teach me but we proudly (albeit naively) brought our baby home before she was even 24 hours old. We were so happy, so thankful it didn't fully sink in to us how little we knew about how to care for this little life. It took both Tim and I to change the first few diapers; a rather comical scene it was. Thankfully, God brought us through and kept Alina alive!!

During Alina's first week the Lord gave us Psalm 139:1-24. The truths in this psalm about God have been the anchor for my mothering. It is in this psalm I read of God's handiwork in creating my children. Because all their days (and mine) are fashioned by God I realized it is not up to me to keep my children free from every germ, every danger, every trial. God is the One who orders their days. I am simply His instrument to accomplish His will in their lives.

In this Psalm I am also given precious promises for my own heart which strengthen me when parenting days are tiring, nights are sleepless or the future seems uncertain. God not only knows, God not only orders our days and nights, but God is actively thinking of us. His thoughts of me are vast, and numberless and very, very personal.

When I was feeling alone, far away from the help of family, and without older women in my life to come alongside me, it was a great comfort to know that God was always with me. And, for those many, many moments when I was experiencing the joy of motherhood (which were by far more than the difficulties) it was good to know that my kind God ordained them for me as well.

Thirty years ago I began the great adventure of parenting. Never is one day the same as another. No child is like another. But my God is the same, His promises are still true, and by His Grace and Mercy my children have survived my many failures and mistakes. Isn't He Good?

My Mom

As we are nearing Mother's Day, I thought I would reflect on my growing up years and life with Mom. I do this for the blessing of my own soul as I know God wants me to remember the days gone by so that I can give Him glory for how He has blessed me and so I can learn from what was good and from what was not. Not all memories are sweet ones but I know that God was at work throughout my life and used all things for my good. I also write as a reminder to myself to learn from my mother's example. I still am a learner.

When I think of Mom many things come to mind. Her laughter, her tears. Her tireless labors in our home. Her love for Dad, her faith in God. Her love for children and her care of the needy. These are some of the things I will be writing about over the next week or so and as I do I hope to highlight some of the women in my life today who also demonstrate these qualities.

I was the 4th child in our family; the next to the youngest. My mother gave birth to me when she was 28. Seven years later my little sister was born (I was very happy to hand over the distinction of being the baby of the family).

The thing that stands out in my mind in my early years was my mother's laughter and tears. I LOVED hearing my mother laugh. I still do. When my mother laughed, as a child I thought all was well with the world. I loved it when she would play games, read to me, sing silly songs to me and push me in the swing. Because she was a very busy stay at home mom, any time I had with her was treasure. Once in a while she would keep me home from school "just because" and we would have a day together. I loved being her "only child" for those days.

Many tears are a memory as well. The Lord did not save my mother until I was 13. I remember often seeing tears stream down her face, or I heard her quiet sobs. As a child and even as a teen I thought these tears were because of something I had done to disappoint her. I never knew the reason for the tears back then but now I know that it wasn't because of me, but rather it was the Lord producing in her an awareness of her need for Him. My mother had many sorrows but she didn't know how to find relief from them until she met her Savior.

There are many moms I know who laugh with their children. Ladies, I cannot tell you enough how important this is. It is too easy to get caught up in the day to day routine of life and not enjoy the funny little ways of our children. I want to encourage you to slow down the pace, and just have fun with those little ones (and growing ones.) Paint, make play dough, make mud pies,walk in the rain with an umbrella and step in puddles and sing. Play games and LOL!!!

And when there are tears, I want to encourage you to communicate with your children what Mommy is sad about. No details needed. Just an explanation that it isn't because of anything your child has done. Or, if it is because of something they have done, have a good long talk that leads to the Cross and the way of forgiveness.

I thank the Lord that He has taught me much through both the laughter and the tears. God is faithful.

A Throwback

I recently had the responsibility (privilege) of caring for my 8 month old grandson for three days and two nights. Everything went really well, but I am tired!! I have a renewed appreciation for the work involved in caring for babies. How easy it is to forget the work that goes with that season of life.

During Timothy's visit I had a deja vu experience. I packed up the baby, with food, bottles diapers, change of clothes, toys, little-guy music, etc. We drove to PA where Joel and Ashley live. Tim had an appointment with another pastor from Covenant Fellowship, so, I jumped on board and used the trip to visit with Ashley and the kids. I was a little apprehensive as I was preparing for the trip. How would the baby travel? How would he handle the disruption in schedule? How would I be able to visit with Ashley if the baby was fussy? Would it really be worth the effort? But once in the van and on our way, I was increasingly excited to be out of the house and enjoying a change of scenery.

What a fun change it was!! I was thrust back in time as I found myself doing what I had done so often 20+ years ago. How often I spent an afternoon with a friend with our babies in our arms or our children playing at our feet. Rarely were these visits a free flow of conversation. There were always spills, tears, dirty diapers, arguments, etc. But that was part of the fun. Sharing motherhood, fellowship and usually a cold or hot drink with another mother.

So there I was yesterday doing exactly that. Only this time I was the grandmother with my daughter-in-law, and grandchildren at my feet. I was freshly aware of how blessed a woman I am.

As I close, I want to encourage all mothers of young children to get out and visit with other moms. Enjoy fellowship. Talk about the books you are reading. Share what recipes you've tried and like, or which ones were flops. Laugh together. Encourage the one who is down. Receive care from the one who can give it. Walk. Drink tea. And change diapers together.
It will make this season not quite so tiring, lonely or stressful when you have a sister in Christ making memories with you.

Have this Mind

"Have this mind among yourselves which is yours in Christ Jesus." (Philippians 2:5)

Why do I do what I do? What motivates me? What should motivate me?

Yesterday we were led to behold two pinnacles of truth. Christ, the everlasting God, high and lifted up, seated on a throne ruling over His creation with a mighty arm. And the exalted Christ To Whom every knee will bow and To Whom every tongue will confess that He is Lord.

In between these pinnacles we were led to the valley of humiliation through three stages of descent: Christ's humble attitude while still with the Father, the emptying of His glory (not His deity) by taking on the form of man, and His obedience to death, even to being cursed by God on the cross. Can you picture again with me how Tim demonstrated this descent into humiliation?

The Apostle Paul in this passage is giving us the motivation for living the Christian life. No Golden Rule religiosity here. No doing good to a neighbor with the expectation that they will do me good in return (if truth be told even with that kind of selfish motivation I fail). No, Christ is the example to follow. But I cannot follow that example unless Christ Jesus has given me the mind (will) to do so. It is only because Christ took my sin upon Himself and was cursed by God, that I am given the motivation and the ability to humbly serve others expecting nothing in return from them.

So, what am I going to do with this? What is one area of my life where I need to "have this mind"? By the grace of God, and relying on the exalted Christ and His Holy Spirit to help me, I am going to serve someone who is unlovely, or difficult to love. Christ did this. Can I do any less? If I claim the name "Christian" which means "Christ's one" then the answer is obvious.

"Is the servant greater than His master?" (John 15:20)

The stages of descent for me will include humility but I doubt it will lead to death. And thanks be to God that I have no curse to dread for that has already been experienced for me by another.

Servant-fighters: serving others by fighting worldliness

Go Humans Go.

Man at his Best

You Deserve the Best Life

Money

Look Your Best


Notice a trend? I was taking a long car drive and thought I would grab a magazine to read--bad idea...I was bombarded with the above headlines (as well as far worse covers!), none of which would have helped me to focus on the Savior, but only on myself. And I admit, it was tempting. (I mean, who doesn't want to "lose weight without dieting" and to "make money without working"...it sounds too good to be true, doesn't it? It is.)

Ladies, we must combat the prevalent view of our culture...that man is good, is entitled to the best of everything, and is never going to face judgment in the afterlife (if there is an afterlife).

We have to fight! Kind of become "servant-fighters." Oxymoron it seems--but Biblical, I believe.

Serve people. Love people. Pursue people.

Then fight for their souls with all of our being. For this we are created and saved by grace. We must pray. We must speak unabashedly of Jesus. We must live and breath the Gospel. All this while humbly acknowledging that without grace we can do nothing.

How sad an existence to live only for yourself and what you can get out of this world. I am reminded of some weeks ago when we were taught that true joy comes when you are part of something much bigger than yourself.

It is not a coincidence that America, the land where everyone is free to pursue "self," is one of the most depressed, selfish, overweight, cruel, insecure, idolatrous, miserable nations on the planet.

We are soldiers. Soldiers in a fierce battle. Battle with eternal significance. All for God's glory.

And as we have heard John Piper say often, "God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him."

Love Him. Treasure Him. Be satisfied in Him. Have joy overflowing in Him.

Only then will people look at our God and glorify Him. And it is for God to be glorified and praised which His children long for--we love Him so.

Isaiah says that one day "we will search for our enemies, but we will not find them...they will be as nothing at all." How great and terrible a promise. God grant that we live to see many of our "enemies" become fellow heirs--for this reason we toil on this earth.

And we know that one day we will see Him in His full glory.