Women By Design

For a long time I struggled with being a girl.

I had an older brother and wanted to do everything he did. I played with G.I. Joes, Legos, Micro Machines, etc. I climbed trees, played t-ball, took karate instead of tap dancing, and would have joined the Boy Scouts if they'd let me.

Don't get me wrong, I did play with my fair share of girl's toys: mini-kitchens, Barbie, and Cabbage Patch Dolls. But I always played with the Ken doll and my Cabbage Patch Doll was a boy. Truth be told, my Nana tried to give me a girl doll and I told her I didn't want it.

My parents had their hands full to say the least.

Honestly, at that age, I don't know that it was any big deal, and I don't really remember what my motivations were or where my heart was. I think it really might have been as innocent as just wanting to be like my older brother, my only sibling. There's certainly nothing wrong with girls playing with Legos and Ken dolls!

But there was always a lurking uncomfortableness with femininity all the way into my college years. It wasn't until after college that I really started to see that God made me female for a reason, and that that isn't a bad thing. In fact, it's a special blessing bestowed upon about 50% of the world's population, and it comes with its own set of strengths and weaknesses, emotions and thought-processes, victories and downfalls.

In today's culture, it's really no wonder to me that so many girls have a distorted view of their femininity. Between the TV commercials, the billboards, and the magazine covers on the racks at the grocery store, women are objectified. To be "accepted" as a female, they must look and act a certain way. They have to be tall enough, skinny enough, blonde enough, high-cheek-boned enough. More often than not, women "falling short" of these qualifications are only declared confident and powerful--a woman's woman--when they flaunt their femininity. They shove it in everyone's face like their provocativeness is the only asset they've got. Little do they know, they're feeding the machine and further objectifying women as eye-candy for the masses.

There are exceptions. We should be exceptions. We older women should be teaching the younger women (girls) that despite what the world says, there's nothing wrong with being female and it's definitely not something they should be afraid of or despair over. God made women as women for a purpose. He considers us no less worthy, no less important than He does men. He's even given men and women unique characteristics, personalities, emotions, thought-processes, etc. that perfectly complement one another.

Let's learn what those are, embrace them, and live them out as females by God's design.

Why Women by Design

Have you ever wished you were different? I've always wished I was taller. At age fifty-two I've pretty much come to accept the the fact that I stopped growing forty years ago. But even now there are times when I find myself wishing I was at least three inches over five feet (6' would be ideal). But it is pointless for me to imagine having long legs. I am 4'11 3/4" short because this is precisely God's design for me.

From the first days of life in the Garden of Eden until now women have chafed against God's plan for them, and have desperately tried to create a better way.

Sadly, women, like Eve, would rather believe a lie than submit to the truth. But in this blog, we want to boldly proclaim the truth of God's creative design; thus the name: Women By Design. While we want to be bold in our commitment to God's word, we at the same time want to humbly plead for God's grace to help us embrace this truth with joyful obedience for the glory of God.

How many of us, at one time or another have complained about womanhood? Beginning with the first menstrual cramps, to not being allowed to play on the boys' high school football team, to not getting the promotion we thought we deserved, to labor pains and staying at home with the children while hubby is at work enjoying lunches in restaurants with clients, to dealing with hot flashes in menopause, we have all at one time or another wished we were not female.

But if you believe God created this world and everything in it, then hopefully you will agree with me that it was created with a design (purpose). I was created female for a purpose. There is a sovereignly created design for my life. When I embrace my design I find joy and freedom, fulfillment and fruitfulness. When I resist my design there is envy, anger, frustration, and all manner of joy-deadening responses and actions. Worst than that, we are setting ourselves above God and accusing Him of making mistakes.

You turn things upside down! Shall the potter be regarded as the clay, that the thing made should say of its maker, "He did not make me"; or the thing formed say of him who formed it, "He has not understanding"? (Isaiah 29:16)

Commenting on this verse Martin Luther wrote:

It is as if the work should say of him that made it, "He made me not; I made myself." If God made us, he certainly knows us as the psalmist shows in Psalm 139:13-16: "I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there were none of them." Proverbs 16:4 also tells us, "The Lord has made everything for its purpose.."

Ladies, will you join me as we seek to grow in our understanding of how and why God made us female? We want to encourage each other to joyfully and passionately embrace our design and find God's blessing in it. I invite you to become a "Woman by Design;" a woman, who no matter what age or stage of life, will echo Samuel: "Speak Lord for your servant is listening," and know as Eli knew, "It is the LORD. Let him do what seems good to him."

We're back!

Hi there! Welcome to the new and improved Women By Design blog!

The WBD bloggers (Gayline, Brooke, Jenn, and Robin) have spent the last month praying, talking, planning, and yes, even doing a little redecorating. We hope you like it.

To kick things off, we'd like to give you a little preview of what you can expect here at the WBD blog for the month of February. First, we'd like you to notice the reading section in the right hand column. TFC's resident book worm, Bruce Bradford, has developed a WBD reading plan for 2010. Now, before you say "there's no way I could read all those books in 11 months!" let me give you a few stats.

The average person reads 250 words per minute. The average book has about 70,000 words in it. If the average person read for 15 minutes three times a day, that's 11,250 words per day. Multiply that by 7 days, and you've got 78,750. Yep, you read that right: that's one book per week. When I heard this at TFC's first PURSUE meeting this year, I couldn't help myself--I said "wow" out loud.

Granted, some of us would have a difficult time finding even three 15 minute slots per day, so we're going to tone it down a little bit. We're just asking for one 15 minute slot a day. At that rate, we should easily be able to cover one book per month. We're dedicating each Friday to talk about the book of the month, so make sure to tune in and let us know your insights and/or questions. First up: Dug Down Deep by Joshua Harris. You can purchase a copy at TFC's bookstore or online at Amazon. If you'd like to get at the TFC bookstore, you'll need to email Bruce by Tuesday morning. He'll have it for you on Sunday. We'll start reading on Monday, Feb 8 to give everyone a chance to grab the book.

Second, we're excited about some regular series we'll be doing. Most Mondays, Gayline will be taking us through the various exhortations in Titus 2:3-5. We'll also be offering our thoughts on the RMMR meditation passage at the end of each month. And you'll want to be sure to check in on Saturdays for our "on the lighter side" posts.

We hope you'll join us for the journey and share your thoughts along the way. Let's get started!

Where'd you go?

Sorry about that. We haven't meant to go silent on you. At least not unexplained.

We (Gayline, Brooke, Jenn, and Robin) are in the process of taking a step back and looking at how we want to proceed with the blog in 2010. We're looking at everything from topics to design.

That being said, would mind taking a moment to let us know what kinds of things you'd like us to be talking about? Are you a homeschooling mom who needs encouragement to keep at it? Are you a single woman who's feeling lonely? Are you a single mom struggling with disciplining your kids? We'd love to be able to speak to where the women of TFC (and hopefully others!) are right now.

And while you're at it, it'd be great if you let us know what you think of the current design. Does it display well on your computer? Is it easy to navigate?

Thanks in advance for your input.

Look for us to come back in full swing on February 1!

New Year--Old Resolutions

I love New Years' Resolutions. I am awesome at making them...just not as successful at keeping them...I'm resolving to work on that.

My list of resolutions for 2010 is shorter than previous years. My focus this year is in making relevant resolutions, accompanied by carefully-laid plans (the hardest part!) on how to move toward attaining the end results I desire.

It is a good mental exercise--resolution-making...sitting down and thinking.

Speaking of 'thinkers'...New Years' Day is too perfect of an opportunity to not do another Jonathan Edwards 'resolution post.'

Rather than listing for you my resolutions for 2010, I think that you would be much more profited by hearing from one who has stood the test of time.

Here are eight choice resolutions from Jonathan Edwards to start off the new decade.

1. Resolved, that I will do whatsoever I think to be most to God's glory and to my own good, profit, and pleasure, in the whole of my duration, without any consideration of the time, whether now or never so many myriads of ages hence. (Resolution 1)

2. Resolved, never to do anything that I should be afraid to do if it were the last hour of my life. (Resolved 7)

3. Resolved, to study the Scriptures so steadily, constantly, and frequently that I may find, and plainly perceive myself to grow in the knowledge of them. (Resolution 28)

4. I frequently hear persons in old age say how they would live if they were to live their lives over again. Resolved, that I will live just so as I can think I shall wish I had done, supposing I live to old age. (Resolution 52)

5. Whenever I hear anything spoken in commendation of any person, if I think it would be praiseworthy in me, resolved to endeavor to imitate it. (Resolution 54)

6. Resolved, to endeavor to my utmost to act as I can think I should do if I had already seen the happiness of heaven and the torments of hell. (Resolution 55)

7. Resolved, when I fear misfortunes and adversities, to examine whether I have done my duty, and resolve to do it; and let it be just as Providence orders it. I will, as far as I can, be concerned about nothing but my duty and my sin. (Resolution 57)

8. Resolved, very much to exercise myself in this all my life long, that is, with the greatest openness I am capable of, to declare my ways to God, and lay open my soul to him: all my sins, temptations, difficulties, sorrows, fears, hopes, desires, and everything, and every circumstance; according to Dr. Manton's sermon on Psalm 119:26. (Resolution 65)

Happy resolution-making!