Walking in the Light

Have you ever stumbled in the dark? Here in NJ it is never really dark at night what with the street lights and the glow from nearby cities, it is rarely possible to walk in the dark.  In Maine, however, it is an entirely different experience. When the sun goes down, it is pitch black.  You literally cannot see your hand.  One benefit of this darkness is that it allows you to see a massive number of stars (I'll post about that some other time.)

How many times have you awakened in the night to take care of a crying baby, or a sick child or for some other reason? Did you stub your toe?  When I was in Maine recently, I had to walk from one end of the campground to the other, alone in the dark.  You can be sure I walked very slowly, cautiously and with my hands out in front of me.  What I would have done for a flashlight!!  Then there was another time when Tim was walking with me.  He was holding my hand, walking slowly just ahead of me telling me what was next: "a dip here", "bend a bit for this low branch", "step up a bit here".  What a help he was!!

I was reading Psalm 119:105:  "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path."  It made me think of the many times I've made a mess of things; when I've stubbed my toes.  Like when I've tripped up in my relationships with others, or in my decision making, or in my parenting, or in my marriage with Tim, or when I'm making slow to no progress in my spiritual walk. After spending time in this psalm I was made to "see" again that I need God's words to shed light on my day to day living.  I can always see a direct connection to how I'm handling life, and how I'm making decisions to how I am spending time in the presence of God in prayer and in His word.  

I Timothy 3:16 reads, "All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent equipped for every good work."

This verse tells us that there is truth available to us for every good work we want to do.  How does God's Word come to bear upon my day to day life? When I'm making a purchasing decision do I stop and ask myself if there is a biblical principle I need to apply to this decision?  When I am homeschooling is there a biblical promise that will encourage and motivate me? When I am in conflict resolution what Scripture governs my thoughts and attitudes?  When I am sinking into a state of discouragement is there a word for me?  When I'm tempted toward anger, selfishness, pride do I process this temptation through the truths of the gospel?

Often I cannot do this on my own.  I need the help of another.  My heart is so deceitful I can easily "spin" my thoughts and reasoning to suit my own way.  I think I'm seeing clearly but if I'm not being directed by God's Word I inevitably fall.  So, I need to ask for help.  I need a husband, an older woman, a sister in the faith to shed the light of truth into my heart.  My pride resists this initially, but when I'm taken into the light I'm thankful for this means of God's grace in my life.  

Is there something you are struggling with?  Are you stumbling?  Are you walking in the darkness of your own reasoning rather than the light of God's Word?  Do you need to ask someone to come alongside you to steer you towards Scripture for help in making a decision?   God's word has something to say about how we are to think, how we are to dress, how we are to spend money, choose our friends, manage our time - in other words:  "our training in righteousness."

I'd love to hear how the Lord is shedding His light on your path.

“Biblical Theology of Singleness”

It was a privilege this week to listen to a wonderful sermon on ‘singleness.’ Considering the plethora of single ladies at TFC, the topic is pretty relevant. :)

As one who has felt a clear and distinct desire to serve the Lord as a life-long single, I embrace the unique opportunities and blessings singleness affords (more time to study, read, evangelize, serve, etc.).

And though many of my Christian sisters desire marriage and children, they are, by God’s grace, committed to ‘make the most of their singleness,’ not wanting to waste their current calling. (For if we waste our singleness by incessant longings for marriage, we are setting ourselves up to waste our marriage by longing for ‘fill-in-the-blank‘…)

And so…my notes on the sermon…


“Single in Christ: A Name Better than Sons and Daughters” (Isaiah 56:1-7) by John Piper

4 ways in which Christ-centered single hood displays, more clearly, truths about Christ and His kingdom:

1)The family of God grows, not by propagation through sexual intercourse, but by regeneration through faith in Christ.
2)Relationships in Christ are more permanent and more precious than relationships in families.
3)Marriage is temporary and finally gives way to the relationship it was pointing to all along; namely, Christ and the church.
4)Faithfulness to Christ defines the value of Christ and all other relationships get their significance from that.

Piper says, “Both marriage and singleness offer unique trials and opportunities for sanctification. There will be unique rewards for each, which are dependent on the response to each.”

Is. 56:4-5 God promised the eunuchs, who chose things pleasing to the Lord, that they would be given a monument and a name better than sons and daughters.

1 Cor. 4:15 and 1 Thess. 2:7 Singles can be spiritual ‘fathers’ and ‘mothers.’

Matt. 19:12 and Mk. 10:29-30 If you can receive it, receive it. If you can receive it, it is your gifting and calling--there will be a reward.

Piper says that asking for ‘both’ (reward and marriage) is like asking for the ocean and a thimble--why would you want a thimble when you have the ocean?!?! Christ will be so far greater…marriage will be a distant memory.

Conclusion: Summoning all Christian singles to radical devotion to Christ


Very encouraging to me…a sermon on ‘singleness’ that preached Christ-centered life service to the Lord (and not just how to crochet doilies while waiting for a husband…)!!! It fed my soul...hope it feed yours. :)

Blue Sunshine Muffins

Preheat oven to 425 degrees.

Grease well a muffin tin.

Melt 1/2 cup butter in sauce pan.

After the butter has cooled slightly, add and stir:

1/2 cup orange juice

2 large eggs (beaten)

1/2 tsp. vanilla

Combine in a mixing bowl:

2 cups all purpose flour

1/2 cup sugar

1 Tablespoon baking powder

1/4 teaspoon cinnamon

1 Tablespoon orange peel (optional)

Toss 1 Tablespoon of the above dry ingredients with 2 cups of fresh blueberries in small  bowl.

Add the butter mixture to the dry ingredients.  Stir only until combined.

Stir in blueberries.

Spoon into muffin tins.

Sprinkle 1/4 tsp. *orange sugar on the crown of each muffin. 

Bake for 12 minutes.  Let set in muffins tins for 10 minutes before removing.

*add a few drops of orange juice to 2 Tablespoon sugar and stir well.

peas and carrots

I don't know about you, but as a mom I struggle almost daily with discouragement. Why won't he eat this food or that food? Where did this tantrum throwing come from? I must be doing something wrong.

Yesterday, for the umpteenth time, I tried giving Timothy some cooked peas and carrot pieces during the finger food part of his dinner. I had no hopes for him eating them, as since the very first time when they were introduced and he loved them, he won't eat them. After chowing down on the puff cereal and cheese that I had also put out, he turned to the veggies. He picked up a piece and squeezed it between his fingers with his usual "I'm not going to eat this" look. And then, surprisingly, he put it in his mouth. And then he reached for another one. And another.

You may think me awfully silly, but my heart immediately soared with praise to God. It had been an unusually discouraging day, and God decided to reach down during my son's dinner time and lift my eyes.

I do none of this child-rearing and parenting on my own. God is in control even of what Timothy eats and doesn't eat. God doesn't allow these difficulties so that I will become discouraged, look down upon myself--look to myself at all, really. He provides them as opportunities to look to Him for strength, guidance, and comfort. I often don't respond correctly. Yesterday, however, was different. And I am thankful.

Side by Side

At our family meeting last night we voted on two new members of the diaconal ministry. Frank and Cathy;  a husband and wife.  Time was limited for how many words of commendation and appreciation for Frank and Cathy could be spoken.  I didn't raise my hand soon enough and lost my chance.  So I thought I'd post my thoughts (in an extended form).

When Frank and Cathy first came to TFC two years ago it was obvious right from the start that these two individuals had hearts to serve.  

Frank loved serving men through personal man to man care. Frank has often provided rides, had lunches, etc. for men in need.  Frank has also served the whole body of men through the monthly Saturday morning "Men Ahead" breakfasts, and as an usher.  Basically whenever there's a job to be done Frank is there.  

Cathy has a heart for spiritual mothering.  I think many of us have felt Cathy's motherly love and concern.  Many, many times Cathy has asked me specific questions about my family which I thought would have been long forgotten.  But she hadn't.  Cathy also has served the women in the kitchen, in her caregroup, through the Lydia Ladies and in countless other ways .  

The thing that has really captured my attention about this couple is their growing desire to channel their ministries together.  They are seeing how they can serve Christ and the body with their God-given gifts, together.  Side by side.  Partners.  A team.  

Many times it is easy for a husband and wife to follow separate tracks of ministry.  They each enjoy what they are doing and encourage each other in the other's ministry.  This is good, but I believe, it could be better.  I believe Frank and Cathy are an example (and there are many other such examples in the church) of what it means to be "complementarian".   Each man and woman has value for how God has created them, and each has infinite value in how God has redeemed them. Each has strengths that helps the other.  Each has gifts given them through the Holy Spirit. Frank is the head of his home and Cathy as his wife, follows his lead.  Now the "completing" that has been functioning in their home is functioning in the life of our church.

Frank and Cathy you are a testimony of God's grace in your marriage.  Thank you for joyfully being willing to serve the body, side by side.   You are an example to us all. 

"Sister, Take Off the Graveclothes!!"

This morning we heard a message from Tim on the doctrine of regeneration.  We are alive in God!  A miracle greater than the raising of Lazarus from the dead has been granted to us who believe.  We were spiritually dead.  Dead.  Not "mostly dead" as Miracle Max described Wesley in Princess Bride.  We were all dead.  No ears to hear the truth.  No desire to have ears to hear the truth.

And then something changed.  Can you remember when that was and what that was like?  Each believer's story of responding to God's voice to "Come Forth" (as was spoken to Lazarus while he was 4 days in the tomb) is different.  But we all know the thrill of the Spirit doing His good work in us to enable us to hear and understand God's truth.  We all know the joy of seeing our sin for what it really was, and seeing our Savior for Who He is and for what He accomplished on the cross.

Over a year ago a dear sister in Christ was given a prophetic word by someone proven to have the gift of prophesy.  I had the privilege of being present for this.  The one giving the prophetic word did not know my friend.  But as I sat there and listened, I worshiped God with wonder and amazement at God's specific care for his daughter.  

God at that moment was wanting this woman to know that she had not been living in the reality of her regeneration.  She was still wearing the graveclothes of guilt and condemnation. She had been functioning with a reversed order of things.  She was more aware of the imperatives than she was of the indicatives of the Gospel resulting in repeated episodes of disobedience, and the guilt and condemnation that disobedience produces.  

The person giving the prophetic word told my friend, "Sister, it's time to take off the grave clothes!!"  In other words, if Christ had given her new life, she need not walk around like she was "mostly dead."  She was not dead at all!  The life she had been given in Christ came with Spirit of God who lives within her.  She was no longer dead.  She was alive and could, with the help of the Holy Spirit, live according to the Spirit, and experience all the fruit and blessings of regeneration.  

Why do I share that story with you?  Because it hits home to me today.  Once again I've been given eyes to see the sin that remains in my heart.  This week I've come to recognize how I live in unbelief towards God when it comes to my interactions with people.  I live in fear.  This is dishonoring to God and it has brought harm to my relationships.  After hearing the truth this morning, I am thanking God that because He has made me alive and His Spirit dwells within me, I can approach this sin (and others) with faith toward God to put this sin to death.

My sisters, are you living in the reality that you are alive in God?  Are you seeing your sin as a reason to despair (condemnation -which is just where Satan wants you); or are you seeing your sin as something you can put to death because you are alive and you no longer want to wear the grave clothes?  

As we walk about our days, in our home, in the workplace, or in school, may others observe a bounce in our step which comes from our confidence in our life in God.  And may we be part of God's life giving process whether it be to an unbelieving husband, a wayward son or daughter, a "strong-willed" child, the woman next door, a parent or a coworker as they observe our "life."  

Can you think of one sin area where you've been saying, "I can't change" that you need to reconsider in light of this truth?  How will living within the indicatives of the Gospel help you?

belly full, diaper dry--but still crying?

I got to babysit my baby nephew last night. He is a little more than seven weeks old, and he enjoys sleeping, eating, and making dirty diapers. He likes his back rubbed, and he thinks that his aunt Jenny heats up one good bottle! He's not that into church history yet and thinks Philip Schaff is pretty boring (we're going to work on that one). He sleeps through prayer, but to be fair, he slept through the ninth inning of a perfect game, too. He's one cute little sinner.

So Jaden (Jaden Austin is the full name) and I were chilling out, watching some baseball. Milk for him, Diet Coke for me. All was well with the world. He finished the bottle and endured the burping like a martyr (his face is the funniest thing to watch when he's getting burped--so resigned!). Slapped a new diaper on, got him some pajamas because the house was chilly, and went back to the living room. He was just the happiest little camper.

Then I sat down.

Every mom and babysitter out there knows exactly how that little face got all puckered, and then a little red, and then the little I'm-just-whining-now-but-if-you-don't-stand-up-and-walk-around-this-is-gonna-become-screaming whine. So I stood up once to test the waters. Silence. Sat down--screaming.

So I said, "Jaden, I love you, but your belly is full, your diaper is dry, and you're not in any pain. Therefore, you're crying because you're not getting what you want. I'm not going to walk around the house all night for your pleasure." I don't know how much of that he grasped, but I guess it didn't mean much to him. He cried for a little bit before deciding that it was more fun to chew his bobo than to cry.

I share this story because it reminded me so much of James 4:1-3, especially verse 3: You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions. In his little way, Jaden was communicating to me a strongly desired "need" that he knew I could meet if I so chose. What I basically told him was, "You have food and you have clothing--with these be content!"

How often I am the wailing infant, convinced that God could and should meet my needs because He loves me, when He is saying, "I do love you, and I will supply all your needs... but there is great gain in godliness with contentment, for you brought nothing into the world, and you cannot take anything out of the world. You have food and clothing, with these be content." (1 Tim. 6:6-8)

Of course, this evening came in timely fashion for me: I am right now reading Calvin's chapter on prayer in the Institutes. I highly commend you take a look-see at that chapter.

"Resident Theologians"

Reading Pastor Tim's "Resident Theologian" blog entries over at FreeTruth has had me thinking about the missional implications of sound theology.

First and foremost, studying theology ministers to our own souls. John Frame said, "Apologetics confronts unbelief in the believer as well as in the unbeliever." We study theology to learn Who our Savior is and to strengthen our faith in Him.

So how important is theology to missions? It is vital!

I believe that one of the main reasons that Christians (especially women) do not witness to unbelievers is because of wimpy theology.

We don't have much to say to people other than "Jesus loves you." That's not good enough. When people ask the hard questions...that simply not good enough. And it scares us into silence.

Evangelical Christians, as a whole, know shockingly little about their faith--about their God. I believe that the shallowness of this "faith" is the prime reason why we have so many de-churched among us.

Paul Washer, missionary and founder of Heartcry Missionary Society, often says, "Eternal life begins the day we are born again. The endless pursuit of 'getting to know God' begins NOW!"

Here are a few questions that are commonly asked by unbelievers (and believers).
1. How can there be a God when there is so much evil in the world?
2. How can Jesus be the only way to God when there are countless millions who have never even heard His name?
3. Why would God punish me? I'm a good person...
4. Why should I worship a God who has given me nothing but grief?
5. What kind of God would demand to be worshiped?

These are questions (and there are a million more) that require much thought and study and prayer to answer meaningfully and Biblically.

We have to know the Word of God. What can we do without our Sword? It would be as foolish as going to battle without a weapon--only this battle is over eternal souls!

God has also given us amazing resources. We, more than any generation of Christians ever, have the greatest theologians of the church age 'at our fingertips' (literally).

If we take seriously the call to be 'fishers of men,' we must take seriously the command to always 'have a reason for the hope that lies within..."

So lets become thinkers, readers, listeners...

Three great resources: TFC bookstore, Desiringgod.org (John Piper), and sermonaudio.com

(Practically speaking, one of the greatest investments I have ever made has been my ipod. Download sermons...redeem commutes, chores, walks, etc!)


Joshuaproject.net 'unreached people of the day':

Please pray for the ...

Chrame of China

Population:	46,000
Language:	Pumi, Northern
Religion:	Buddhism
Evangelical:	0.00%
Status:	Unreached

Cooking with Tears

Today is my first day back in the kitchen after being in Maine for a week.  It is always hard getting back into the routine of meal planning and preparing.  I've always thought if I lived by myself I would only eat cold cereal.  But I do not live by myself and happily there are those that depend on me to prepare their daily bread.

As I was fixing dinner (one of the family favorites passed on to me from a good friend - Spicey White Chicken Chili) I came to the slicing/dicing part of the prep.  This had always been the dreaded task; for up until recently I'd never found a preventative for the burning and tearing in the eyes when handling onions.  Believe me I've tried all the supposed cures.  Up until recently I thought the most effective one was chewing peppermint gum while cutting the onion.  But now I have the final answer and I'm passing it on to you.  Take it from me.  It works!!

You must remove the skin of the onion by peeling it back from the top, down to the root. Do not cut off the root end. You will find that as you slice the onion down to the end, you are not in pain.  It's wonderful, and because I love all you cooks who labor in love for your families, I thought I'd share this discovery with you.  Free of charge.  Happy cooking!

sweet water and words seasoned with salt

If a sudden jar can cause me to speak
        an impatient, unloving word,
    then I know nothing of Calvary love.*

*For a cup brimful of sweet water cannot spill even one drop of bitter water, however suddenly jolted.

Amy Carmichael, If (Fort Washington, PA: Christian Literature Crusade), 46.

Isn't that a piercing little dart? This is my tentative response to the recent excurses on sanctified speech over at the FreeTruth blog. Those posts are so good--aren't they helpful? When Pastor Tim started, I was like, "Right on!" And by the time he finished, I was like, "Woe is me, for I am undone!"

For me personally, my struggle with my mouth is in the arena of interpersonal communications. I purposed a while ago not to curse or use vulgar speech. That's great. But I can cause a lot more destruction with a bad attitude and some legitimately fine words than with any single "bad" word ever spoken. I memorized Colossians 4:6 a long time ago and am still pondering through the ramifications of what would happen if every single word I spoke was with grace and "seasoned with salt."

How do I go about making my mouth a means of grace? How do I season every word with salt? How does this become a deep, inner change, becoming sweet water that is not afraid of a spill, and not just an outer change, hoping that when jarred my bitter water won't spill too badly or maybe not at all?

1. Take it seriously and believe that I speak "out of the abundance of the heart," whether good or evil.
2. Repent.
3. Pray specifically that God will show me when I am speaking words that are brash, obnoxious, disrespectful, irreverent, argumentative, unthoughtful, arrogant, and rude.
4. Memorize Scripture. Ps. 19:14, Ps. 141, Mt. 12:33-37, Eph. 4:29, Phil. 2:14-15, Col. 4:6, James 3
5. Pray the Scripture that I've memorized. (Ps. 141:3 over and over again!)
6. Ask people to correct me and determine to accept humbly what they say (ouch! cringing just at the thought).

I'm a huge hypocrite in this area (just ask anyone who lives with me!). But Augustine rightly prayed, "And all my hope is nowhere except in Your great mercy. Grant us what You command, and command us what You will." (Confessions 10.29)

A Martyr's Faith

This account so deeply moved me that I would like to share it with you all. It is the July 15th entry in The One Year Book of Christian History.

Julins Palmer was the son of the mayor of Coventry, England. He went to Magdalen College, Oxford, distinguishing himself as a student. He spoke Latin with great facility and excelled in Greek as well...after receiving his bachelor of arts degree in 1550, he began teaching logic at Magdalen College.

Palmer was a committed Roman Catholic in what had become a largely Protestant university. Edward VI, the teenaged king of England, was a committed Christian and firm supporter of the Reformation. During Edward's brief reign, the Reformation accelerated throughout England, and so Palmer's views were not popular. Palmer was not bashful about his beliefs. As a result, he was often called before the officers of the university and disciplined for his aggressive Catholicism.

Shortly before the death of Edward VI in 1553, anti-Protestant signs attacking the college president were put on the walls and doors. Julins Palmer was the prime suspect. When questioned by the college officers, he denied that he was responsible. Yet in the interviews he attacked college leadership so aggressively that he was removed from the faculty. Palmer was forced to take employment as a tutor for a wealthy family.

Then Edward VI died, and the new queen, Mary Tudor, was an ardent Roman Catholic. She sent representatives to Oxford to get rid of the Protestant professors and to replace them with Roman Catholics. Julins Palmer promptly got his job back at Magdalen College.

Back at his teaching, Palmer became fascinated by the behavior of the many Protestants who were being burned at the stake by Queen Mary, who was earning her name "Bloody Mary." Under Edward VI, he had often said that the Protestants would never die for their faith, but now they were. He investigated in great detail how they were arrested, what beliefs they held, and how they died. He learned how brutally the martyrs were treated and how valiant they were in death. When the burnings started in Oxford, he went to see for himself.

Palmer was present when Latimer and Ridley were burned at the stake. God used the experience to begin to change his heart. Then as he earnestly began to study the Scriptures, God completed Palmer's change of heart.

Realizing he could no longer teach at Oxford, he resigned and became the schoolmaster of a grammar school in the town of Reading. Roman Catholics in the town, suspecting he might have become a Protestant, entered his study and found documents he had written against the Catholic Church. They threatened to expose him if he would not leave Reading.

Leave he did, not being able to take with him his belongings or his last payment for his work. He returned home to his mother to request the funds his father had left him in his will. His mother told him, "Thy father bequethed nought for heretics."

Returning to Reading to try to reclaim his belongings, he was arrested. On July 15, 1556, Julins Palmer was condemned to death for his faith. The sheriff gave him one last chance to recant, telling him that if he did, the sheriff would see that he had financial support for life. He even offered to find Palmer a wife. Palmer very graciously declined, saying that he had already given up two positions for Christ's sake and was now willing to give up his life.

The next day at 5:00 P.M., Palmer and two other martyrs were brought to the place of execution. The three dropped to their knees, and Palmer prayed Psalm 31, ending with the words, "Be strong and take courage, all you who put your hope in the Lord!" As the flames engulfed them, the three lifted their hands to heaven crying out, "Lord Jesus, strengthen us; Lord Jesus, receive our souls."

May we respond with like faith, by the grace of God.

John Calvin's Wife

I am in Maine with Tim, serving at a youth camp this week.  I wasn't planning on blogging while here, but since there is internet access, and since I came across this post from another blog I read, I thought I would share it with you.  Read and give thanks to God for godly women as this.

Idelette: John Calvin's Wife
by Janis Shank

I love biographies! There is something powerful about reading the entirety of a person’s life journey that inspires faith toward God while I am still living mine. Most recently, I have been deeply affected by the life of John Calvin, who was born 500 years ago July 10. Many worldwide tributes devoted to his remembrance and the impact he made on church history are occurring this year. John Piper explains how we honor God through appreciating Calvin in particular:

"I am eager for people to know Calvin...because he took the Bible so seriously, and because what he saw on every page was the majesty of God and the glory of Christ. Calvin continues to inspire me because of his relentless focus on the greatness of God....

In the end, Calvin’s manifold ways of inspiring us have the effect they do century after century because he saw the gospel so clearly and made Christ so central....

If Jesus Christ, in all his majesty and excellence, is kept in clear view, the church will be kept from many errors. Therefore, Calvin continues to inspire and serve the church five hundred years after his birth.... " (taken from Desiring God blog).

We thought we would honor John Calvin indirectly by taking a peek at his dear wife, Idelette. She, like us, was married to a pastor, called to be a helper to a man devoted to the service of God and His people. What can we learn from this “older woman” of the faith?

Idelette lived from 1510 to 1549. We are introduced to her when she and her first husband converted to the Reformed faith from being Anabaptist, and along with their two children joined John Calvin’s church in Strasbourg, Germany. In the spring of 1540 Idelette’s husband died of the plague. Surprisingly, by August 6 of the same year, she married John Calvin, the pastor who conducted her husband’s funeral. Calvin’s ideal in a wife is revealed in his words to a friend: “But always keep in mind what I seek to find in her; for I am none of those insane lovers who embrace also the vices of those with whom they are in love, where they are smitten at first sight with a fine figure. This only is the beauty which allures me, if she is chaste, if not too fussy or fastidious, if economical, if patient, if there is hope that she will be interested about my health.” John found this ideal in Idelette as their brief and devoted union proved.

After six months of marriage, John and Idelette moved to Geneva, Switzerland where her husband assumed his new duties serving the Savior whom he so deeply loved. They kept a lively home, offering hospitality to many and it was said of Idelette, “Your hospitality in the name of Christ is not unknown to anybody in Europe.” She certainly assisted her husband’s ministry by keeping an open heart and an open home, often helping the poor and devoting herself to deeds of charity.

During the next few years Idelette had two miscarriages and gave birth to precious son, Jaques, who lived only two weeks. Deeply weakened and ill from his birth, she took comfort in God and in the words of her husband, “The Lord has certainly inflicted a severe and bitter wound in the death of our infant son. But He is Himself a father, and knows what is good for his children.” 

Their marriage didn’t last long by today’s standards, and in 1549, after only nine years, Idelette finally succumbed to the illness that plagued her most of her life. John was at her bedside when she died and heard her triumphantly exclaim, "O glorious resurrection! O God of Abraham and of all our fathers, the believers of all the ages have trusted on Thee and none of them have hoped in vain. And now I fix my hope on Thee." She certainly was a true companion to her husband and shared his deep conviction in the sovereign love and grace of God. Her very last words proclaim God’s greatness and her trust in Him!

John Calvin’s grief was profound, and his words reveal the depth of his love for his wife, “I have been bereaved of the best companion of my life, who, if our lot had been harsher, would have been not only the willing sharer of exile and poverty, but even of death. While she lived she was the faithful helper of my ministry. From her I never experienced the slightest hindrance.”

What can we learn from Idelette’s brief journey while we are still living ours? Here are a few take-a-ways for our encouragement.

1. She loved the Savior and served Him by loving her husband, children and God’s people entrusted to their care, often through hospitality and deeds of love. She devoted herself to the advancement of the gospel in her lifetime. We have the same calling and privilege.

2. She endured loss and physical suffering by trusting in the sovereignty of God. Though we live in an age of modern medicine and many modern conveniences, we too suffer in various ways and can find our comfort in the same Sovereign Love.

3. She was a “faithful helper” of her husband’s ministry and “the best companion” of his life. There is something so inspiring about this simple yet profound commendation by her husband. By God’s grace, I can do this day by day; faithfully helping and seeking to be my husband’s best companion. 

4. She maintained a robust hope in God, even at her death. By God’s grace, may we be ever growing stronger in this hope, now in life and all the way to our dying breath.

As you enter a new week, I pray you are inspired and encouraged by this ancient pastor’s wife to trust and serve our Savior. May God give us grace to live in such a gospel advancing way as to leave a legacy for those who will follow after us, just like our friend Idelette.

happy birthday, John Calvin!

Today, of course, is July 10, the 500th birthday of John Calvin. John Piper says that we all ought to have one dead hero and one living hero, whose lives we should study as carefully as we can. Calvin, for me, is quickly becoming the dead hero. Biographies, especially this year, are legion, and our own newsletter is featuring an excellent article on the importance of Calvin. Ephesians 4 speaks of the gifts that God has given to men--one of those gifts is teachers. Today I celebrate God's goodness to mankind, in that He extended His mercy and grace to a blinded and shepherd-less people by raising up a man like Calvin.

One of things about reading Calvin that has amazed me is that the issues he dealt with are the same issues we are dealing with today! There is truly nothing new under the sun. Therefore, his sense of urgency and his need for God ring loudly with me. This following prayer has a sense of exhortation and rebuke that I, you, we would do well to heed.

Grant, Almighty God, that as thou shinest on us by thy word, we may not be blind at midnight, nor willfully seek darkness, and thus lull our minds asleep, but may we be roused daily by thy words, and may we stir up ourselves more and more to fear thy name to thus present ourselves and all our pursuits as a sacrifice to thee, that thou mayest peaceably rule, and perpetually dwell in us, until thou gatherest us to thy celestial habitation, where there is reserved for us eternal rest and glory through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

John Calvin, Steward of God's Covenant: selected writings, ed. John F. Thornton and Susan B. Varenne (Random House: NY, 2006), 329.

Resolution #2

How much do you think about heaven?

Better yet, how much do you think about hell?

Jonathan Edwards thought a lot about both. In fact, he believed that meditation on the realities of each would result in appropriate Christian actions.

Resolved, to endeavor to my utmost to act as I can think I should do if I had already seen the happiness of heaven and the torments of hell. (July 8, 1723)

In what ways would our actions be different (and more Biblical) if we meditated more on the "happiness of heaven" and the "torments of hell?"

1. Meditating on heaven produces genuine joy and contentment for the believer, affecting all areas of life and all resulting actions.

2. Meditation on heaven and hell produces a sobriety of manner and a seriousness in the necessary practice of self-examination (lest we deceive ourselves), befitting a war-time soldier.

3. Meditation on the terrifying reality of hell compels us to grow in mercy toward the unbelieving, knowing their eternal misery if they remain unrepentant.

4. Meditating on the glories of heaven produces humility, knowing that it is through Christ's work alone that we are already "seated in the heavenly places"--humble people serve others.

5. Meditation on hell forces us to overcome any fear of man we might have--the more we think on the horrors of hell, the more we are necessitated by compassion to speak to anyone and everyone we can about the gospel.

These are only five (and there are countless) ways in which we would be affected by resolving to act as though heaven and hell are realities. Did you catch that? Act as though heaven and hell are realities!

We believe they are. We just don't act like it. I certainly don't. And I can pretty much guarantee that every interpersonal "issue" I have, every wrong attitude I have toward another person, every disgruntled day I spend complaining about "whatever" would be completely done away with if I meditated more on the realities of heaven and hell.

We know that we must combat the desire to sin with a greater desire--the desire for God. What better way to whet our appetites than to look forward to the day when we shall finally see Him "face to face."

Three Words

I have observed two opposite approaches to submission.  

One:  do whatever the husband says, no questions asked.  Most likely the wives that fall into this approach wouldn't go so far as to actually commit sin for their husband (in Acts 5:1ff).  But anything other than sin that the husband asks (or demands, commands, bullies) is hers to do.

Two:  submission is only theoretical.  The wife would agree that submission is taught in scripture but she rationalizes her responses (demands, tantrums, pouts) as being acceptable in her situation.

It seems to me the three words used by Mr. Hurley in his article in yesterday's blog would help us avoid these extremes (and anything in between that isn't guided by the biblical teaching of complementarianism).  

Discussion, prayer, consultation.  I could spend a day blogging on each word, but because I'm leaving town soon I'll have to just give some quick comments to get your thoughts going.  

Discussion.  This means communication.  Communication that is guided by Scripture.  Loving, without anger, open to listening to the other's viewpoint, not using exaggeration or generalization, humble enough to admit when the other's position is valid and worth following, and clear enough to communicate fully your thoughts.

Prayer.  This means before, during and after the "discussion."  Prayer for the Lord to give you a humble, gentle, loving spirit and the clarity to speak well all of your thoughts.  Prayer for the husband's leadership, and his "submission" to God and Scripture.  Prayer for the Lord to give you a submissive spirit (it doesn't come naturally!!).  Prayer that the Lord will use this as an opportunity for both you and your husband to grow in godliness.  Prayer for the results to be successful (regardless of who "wins").   Prayer for a humble, gentle, loving spirit to handle the results in a godly way.  

Consultation.  This is one that I think is often overlooked.  This is when couples find themselves at a stalemate and cannot move ahead.  They need to get outside help.  The book of Proverbs tells us there is wisdom in counsel.  Many times couples are so emotionally involved in the decision-making that they cannot "see the forest for the trees."  This is where a care-group leader's or a pastor's insight needs to be sought.  This is NOT a time for a wife to be making phone calls or emails trying to "build her case" until she gets the support she wants. NEITHER is it a time for the husband to manipulate his wife to "not make him look bad" in front of the counselor.  

Most day to day interactions between husband and wife do not need consultation from another party.  But, if discussion and prayer are not a part of any decision there is the very real danger that sin will occur.  The husband may "cower" from his wife's rants, or the wife may "shrink" away with what she believes to be submission.  The husband may use "power" to demand his way, or the wife lose control of her emotions in an angry outburst or flood of tears.

Though the world thinks complementarianism is archaic, it is God's way, and God's ways always work.  There is peace, joy and order in a marriage that functions with godly leadership and loving submission.  

May God's grace abound to you.

Leadership and Followership

How does this morning's message apply to our lives as women in marriage?  Tim referenced marriage as well as other leader/follower relationships as he was building a case for biblical roles in the church.  I found Tim's definition of a follower is helpful:  "Spiritual followership is embracing those who are called to lead you to wherever God wants you to be, by sharing their vision with loving honor, joyful affection, ready obedience and humble service, all in devotion to the Lord."  

The key phrase:  "all in devotion to the Lord" gives us the motivation to follow a husband's decision either when there is sin in our own heart, or sin in the husband's heart, or when the husband doesn't have perfect insight or omniscience or access to all necessary information.  We follow a higher leader than our husband.  We follow God.  In God we put our trust.

But what happens when a husband and wife cannot reach agreement on a decision?  I have been helped by this excerpt from Man and Woman in Biblical Perspective by James B. Hurley.

Headship and leadership most often involve initiative rather than command.  There are however, situations in which differences come between a leader and those who respond to him or to her.  These can often be resolved by communication.  For Christians in such situations there is the added guidance of Scripture and the peaceful work of the Holy Spirit.  Prayer and Scripture have their place alongside talk.  Our sinfulness, ignorance and sheer diversity will nevertheless still lead to situations in which differences are not resolved and in which neither side is willing to yield to the other.  In marriage, such situations can be severe crises if the situation is such that a decision must be made even if there is not agreement.

The Scripture is the guide for faith and life in the Christian home.  A husband's authority in the home is derivative:  as a servant of God, his authority comes from God.  He is, therefore, subject to Scripture in all that he does, and has no freedom to guide his family in ways, which contradict it.  Should he clearly do so, individual members must follow God before man.  The example of Sapphira's willing sin and personal accountability makes this clear (Acts 5:9).

There are, however, other situations, not involving contradiction of biblical teaching in which husband and wife, even after discussion, prayer and consultation with other, remain irreconcilably committed to different courses of action and are not prepared to give way for the sake of the other.  There need not be many such cases, but in a fallen world there will be some.  In them, the responsibility of the husband to lead and of the wife to respect his initiative requires her to yield to his decision.

The manner in which such situations are handled is crucial.  The husband may not be high-handed and stubborn, knowing that she will finally have to give way.  That is not the model of Christ's headship.  Neither may the wife be grudging and resentful.  That is not the manner of our response to Christ.  In the last analysis, when the two can devote no more time to individual and joint seeking of the grace of God to permit them to come to one mind or to be willing to yield to the other, an exchange along the following lines is in order:

Husband:  'Not because I am inherently wiser or more righteous, not because I am right (although I do believe I am or I would not stand firm), but because it is finally my responsibility before God we will take the course which I believe right.  If I am being sinfully stubborn, may God forgive me and give me the grace to yield to you.'

Wife:  'Not because I believe you are wiser in this matter (I don't) or more righteous, nor because I accept that you are right (because I don't or I would not oppose you), but because I am a servant of God who has called me to honor your headship, I willingly yield to your decision.  If I am wrong, may God show me.  If you are wrong, may he give you grace to acknowledge it and to change.'

Such decisions must be made.  They can be steps of commitment to God which cement a relationship and assure both partners of the other's loving commitment. They can alternatively be times which show sinful abuse.  The sort of commitment outlined above can be used to preserve the dignity and honesty of both partners by setting matters in their proper context.

How does your heart and mind respond to this?  Did you read the part about discussion, prayer and consultation?  I have found over the years that many (including myself) have created sparks in the marriage when the process is short-circuited by not including these three key elements. But even with these in place, the disagreeing wife must follow the leader.  

More tomorrow.

Death is not dying

You may or may not have heard of Rachel Barkey and her message that death is not dying. (If you haven't watched her video, you really should consider redeeming the time from some other activity and taking an hour to watch it.)

Rachel was dying of cancer. Yesterday God took her home.

The world wants us to feel the tragedy - to wonder why God would take someone so young - to mourn over her faded beauty - to give her husband an excuse to neglect Christ and his family - to give her children an excuse to hate God. The world wants us to excuse her joy and peace in dying as something that dying religious people do, not as something supernatural and the result of a life lived in Christ. That's the world's view. I know it from experience.

Christians need to respond differently. Unfortunately (and I know this from experience, too), often we don't respond any differently. Here are four ways (there are more!!) that I am purposing to respond to Rachel's home-going.

1. Praise God for glorifying Himself and making His great name known through her life and death.
2. Thank God for giving her rest and reward from the suffering, and for giving her the strength to endure to the end.
3. Pray earnestly and consistently for her husband and two children. Don't forget about them in a week, but mark it down somewhere that I'll see as a reminder to pray for them, especially for the children, that God will use this to bring about their salvation.
4. Pray that God will use this testimony as a means to do something revolutionary in my life.

"Of course there is but one real preparation for Christian dying, and that is Christian living. . . . We must not forget that God is honored or dishonored by the way a Christian dies as well as by the way in which he lives. There is great significance in the description given in the Bible of the death by which John should 'Glorify God' (John 21:19); to my mind it implies that to die well is to live well."

Elizabeth Prentiss, Stepping Heavenward, Barbour Publishing, Inc., 1998, p. 227