This morning's message and the responses to it make me think of an interaction I had ten years ago with my then 4-year old son, David. Let me share the story, then I'll share why it rings a bell with me today.
David is the youngest of my six children. At the time, my oldest was 20 still living at home going to college, my next was away at college, and the remainder were being home schooled. It was a distracting time in my life to be sure, but it was during a short period of time when I was especially preoccupied with life beyond the walls of my home that I had this exchange with David. You see, he'd been disobeying. A lot. But in my distracted state, I gave in to selfishness and laziness and did not address the disobedience as I should have. I was verbally snapping at him, scolding, complaining. This went on for several days. One night as I was tucking him in to bed he said to me, "Mommy, you've been upset with me a lot lately." To which I replied, "Yes, because you have not been obeying Mommy. What I should have been doing is spanking you instead of scolding you." To which David responded with these very instructive words: "Mommy, I would rather you spank me than be upset with me."
David was accustomed to the approach to discipline which Tim and I believe to be biblical: disobedience requires loving discipline which brings about repentance, which leads to reconciliation. Without that, there is a general unpleasantness that pervades the atmosphere creating tension between parent and child. The beauty of biblical discipline done in love is that the air is cleared with lots of cuddles exchanged. The child no longer wonders where he (she) stands in mom's eyes. He is confident in his place as a son under the authority of the parent.
How does this relate to this morning's message? Despite the nature of the message (killing sin), there seemed to be a collective sigh of relief. "Ahhhh, this is the help my soul has needed." Without the Good Shepherd giving me a good shepherd to lead me, to teach me and to put the crook of the staff around my neck to get me out of danger I, like a dumb sheep, often find myself wandering into danger. My conscience tells me I am being disobedient. But I try to suppress this conviction by busying myself with other things. This results in a general unpleasantness in my spirit. I feel distant from God and do not experience the joy and peace of fellowship with Him. What I really need is to receive the rod of correction that brings me to repentance so that I can experience the forgiving grace of Christ and a conscience cleansed.
I was given ammunition this morning for fighting my flesh. May God grant me grace to have my gun loaded with my finger on the trigger so that I will be ready when the enemy appears yet again.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
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2 comments:
There is only one thing worse than being disciplined incorrectly, and that is never being disciplined at all.
Feeling ignored or uncared for is worse, I think, than being 'yelled at.' And yet, so many pastors take this 'I don't see or won't say anything' approach to shepherding.
The result is despondent sheep, rebellious sheep, or wolves among the sheep.
It is better to be spanked and know where you stand. "Open rebuke is better than hidden love."
Your story illustrates this beautifully.
Having never experienced the joys & trials of motherhood can sometimes make me feel like I am at a disadvantage among women...I admit it. But, I want to say here that I feel so blessed to be a part of a group of women who can share their stories honestly in such a way that illustrates to me, the 'parenting' of my Heavenly Father. I can so relate to what you are saying Gayline, even though I have never been a Mom.
Another illustraion, in both yours and Robin's posts, that speaks clearly to my mind & heart, is that of the shepherd and His sheep. It not only speaks to the shepherding of our Lord, but also to the necessary shepherding by our pastors. We are truly fortunate that we have pastoral shepherds who listen carefully to the Great Shepherd, and seek to guide us in the way which we should go. This little lamb desperately needs the guidance given by both her pastors, and the mature Christian women which is so freely and lovingly provided here. So I say 'BAA-AMEN' to you, and thank you!
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